am i ready?

Question

hi im 19 have a two yrs old do you think i should have another baby i love being around babies me and my boyfriend want another child he has a very good job only problem is my family they wouldnt approve they wanted me to abort before i would really value your opinions

Answer 1

Only you and your boyfriend can answer that question. Just remember that every child is different, so if things were easy with your first child, they may not be so with the second. You're still young, so take your time to decide what's right for you.

Answer 2

I don't want to sound judgemental. My personal opinion would be no. Wait.
Is there any reason you and your "boyfriend" are having babies with no wedding rings?
If it's the "we're not ready for marraige" thing, then how exactly are you ready for more babies? If it's because he doesn't want to get married...then absolutely don't have more children with him. It is only going to get ugly later on. It will. One child stuck in the middle will be bad enough.
As far as your family goes...I applaud you for bringing that baby into the world. Good for you for standing your ground. Just remember that your family loves you more than any man will ever love you. Ever. If they are concered for you, it's probably with good reason. Sometimes they see something that you don't want to see.
My suggestion would be to wait 1 year before trying to have another baby, if you decide to go for it. I can tell you that it is so much easier having them spaced out just enough that they can walk, talk, eat and potty all by themselves before you have another one to start over with. Having had to hold a new born in one hand and try to help an 18 month old go potty in a public restroom with the other hand, I know what I'm talking about.
My 1st and 2nd are 3 years apart. It's great. They are close enough to be friends, I didn't have 2 in diapers at the same time, and the oldest got to feel like a big brother and help out. Then we got a big surprise! My daughters are only 14 months apart. It was so hard. Two in diapers. More jealousy issues. Not born with enough hands to go around. It was hard. Did I mention that?
If you really want another child with this man, waiting a little while can only make things easier on both of you. Right?

Answer 3

MY MOTHER always taught me that, if I wanted to have a baby with my gf I should be ready. The Quality is always better than Quantity.

Anyway, the choice is all yours, but if I were you, I will consider my current baby, Is the baby well taken care of? I mean you are only 19, why not take another 1 or 2 years to take real good care of your baby before trying to get another one.

But if accidentally you get pregnant, you shall not abort because it is a gift from the god...

Answer 4

Hon this is your decision, not your familys. I have a friend who aborted because everyone told her to, and she only had me for a support system. She has regretted it every since. We are no longer friends because her baby would have been my son's age, she cant stand to look at him, it reminds her of her own. Dont let other people tell you what to do, make the decision yourself. Personally, if you already have a child, want another, can afford it, I would probably go for it. Any plans to wed? If so, wait till married, if not, maybe rethink the concieving of the child.

Answer 5

im 23 now and pregant with my third. i was 19 when my first was concieved. my husband is an engineer so money is no problem for us. However i would not change a thing we tried for all of our children and wanted to have a big family and be young enough to enjoy them. I think that if you and your b/f wants to have another baby then you should go ahead and do it. Everyone else will just have to understand. you do what you want. good luck.

Answer 6

it depends on how you and your boyfriend feel about having another baby, are you emotionally stable. if you have any friends who have newborns ask them if you could babysit for a day to get an idea of how things will be with your two year old and a newborn. you are still young you have many years to have another child so if there are any doubts in your mind about it then i would wait til everything feels right. but seriously try that a friend of mine thought she was ready for a baby when i had my son she has a year and a half old baby well she was talking to me about wanting another baby and i told her to babysit my son for a day with her little one as well, after about 5 hours of my son crying and her son getting into everything she decided that right now wasnt the best time to have another baby she didnt think she woud be emtionally ready

Answer 7

My personal opinion is no. 19 is very young and one child is much less complicated than two. I have two and they are almost exactly two years apart. I think you should wait till your at least 24. Here's why, not only will you have had plenty of bonding time with the first one and given him/her high quality parenting, but your brain will be much more mature. Speaking from a scientific point of view, your frontal lobe will have almost fully matured. Plus this will in turn give you quality time to spend with your second child.

Good luck : )! Remember, in the end its really up to you.

Answer 8

I am 24 and working on my 4th child. It is all up to you guys. If you plan on being together than why not? People will say your young and not married and all that stuff but you have to do what makes you happy. If being a mother makes you happy and you and your man are ready than why not. You are a grown women and can make your own decisions now. Your family will get over it they always do. If they don't than they will be missing out on a beautiful blessing.

Answer 9

I think you should marry before bringing another child into a broken family arrangement. Its bad enough with your own family has no regaurd for your own flesh and blood, but for a father to have no commitment to the mother in the form of a marriage contract its just unsettling.

Only you can decide if you're ready for another child, because only you are aware of all the circumstances surrounding your situation. However, I would advise you to be mature enough to value the sanctity of marriage and the commitment it provides for both parents to love and cherish eachother and their children.

Its protection for you, and stability for your babies, something thats greatly needed for their correct emotional development.

As for your own family, if you cant separate yourself from their opinions and accept that they are people who are more than capable of failure, not only in thought, but in action, you will never be the parent your children need you to be.

Of course you should plan for more children if you want them, but plan out the rest of your life as well, its not a casual decision. Babies need daddies, but so do adults, you need to provide yourself and your children with as much chance of a participating father as possible. That doesnt come from him claiming he will always be there, it comes from his actions of proving it.

Get married, have babies, be happy.

Answer 10

babies arent toys. You cant just have a baby because you like to be around babies. Is there a reason your family wouldnt be supportive? I think you should wait. Enjoy the baby you have now