My partner and I have different views on 3somes.
He believes if a woman was to have a 3some with 2 blokes (1 being her partner) that having s*x with the other bloke is not regarded as cheating.
I believe that having any form of contact with another bloke in a sexual way - whether your partner is in the same room or not - is cheating.
i would like to know what everyone else thinks.
thanks
2006-11-08 00:01:31 · 56 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yes. It is cheating! And in any case, there are all sorts of problems related to 3 somes.
Ask you bf what would happen if you fell for the other bloke? What kinda bloke would agree to bang his mates girl!!?? Or if he wants a 3some now with 2 blokes, how long will it be before he expects you to have a 3some with another girl. What about S.T.D'.s? Especially in this day and age, I mean, come on! And then what! What if He falls for the other girl. It is really not worth going down that road. Rather suggest you get some "toys" to spice up the bedroom. There are alsorts of wonderful gadgets around. Far safer, and much more satisfying in the long run.
2006-11-08 00:21:02 · answer #1 · answered by dragonfly 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If both parties of the couple have agreed to the 3some then no one is cheating. Any 3some has to have rules and I suppose it depends on what rules you are both setting. I take it that you are thinking about this as something for you both to do. If you are not happy with there being physical contact with anyone other than your partner why not find a voyeur, they can watch and there will be no comprimising.
2006-11-08 00:27:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it dont really matter what he considers to be cheating or not on this subject. 3somes are something that a couple should both agree with and if you dont feel comfortable about it then he should respect it.
having a 3some would be cheating to some people and not to others. there is no right or wrong just your own opinion. but doing do something you dont agree with for the sake of pleasing your partner is wrong.
2006-11-08 00:07:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If both partners are consenting to the act it can't be construed as cheating.
But just because it's not cheating doesn't necessarily make it OK, you're obviously put off by the idea so for you I'd say it was a general no no.
Unless of course it's just this cheating thing that makes the idea repugnant to you, in which case it's fine and I'll come be your third....
2006-11-08 00:42:10 · answer #4 · answered by garfet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that cheating can be defined as deception, or betrayal.
If there is dishonesty or somebody is not consenting, then you have cheating...or abuse. No matter what the gender of the person/people involved.
If everybody willingly consents to a given situation then it is not destructive, the problems come when people lie.
I urge you to be careful, not everything we imagine to be good in fantasy is as good in reality, nothing can ever live up to a fantasy or be as perfect in your mind as it is in the cold light of day.
You will find that in reality situations such as this are beset by emotional pitfalls and unless you enter with your eyes wide open with very good communication and trust between all, there could be a long long list of problems.
Also, never ever be talked into something sexually which you are not wholeheartedly happy to particpate in
S
x
2006-11-08 00:48:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's going to depend on you two as a couple. There are many couples out there that don't regard 3somes as cheating. Note, that many of those relationships don't last because sooner or later one person takes it personal and gets hurt. If you consider it cheating, don't take part in it or allow your partner to... not if you want it to last.
2006-11-08 00:18:18 · answer #6 · answered by zaniest1 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Cheating means doing something without someone's knowledge, well in the respect you mean it anyway. And if your partner is there, then it OBVIOUSLY aint cheating, its consented by both of you. Having a 3some without him there and him not knowing is cheating. but if he knows then it aint cheatin. Coming into contact with another bloke whilst with one is just called slutty.
2006-11-08 00:05:28 · answer #7 · answered by london lady 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I see both points of view. My take on it is this; if you and your partner were planning on having a 3some the other man/woman is a prop. That 3rd person becomes a sex-toy like a vibrator. However do to your opinion on it, you shouldn't allow him to talk you into it.
2006-11-08 00:06:41 · answer #8 · answered by Floss 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it would be cheating simply because 3some works both ways if you consider your man cheating if he has a 3some then that is your opinion. I you all consent to it then it is not wrong be open minded
2006-11-08 00:25:36 · answer #9 · answered by Sarah M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think cheating is anything you do that you don't want your partner to know you did. 3sums are not cheating different people like different things my fiance and I are swingers and we have been together for five years and have a wonderful relationship. We regard ourselves as loyal and faithful to each other and our relationship. Neither of us would dream of doing anything behind the others back. The point is you have to decide for yourself what your relationships rules and boundaries are you cant expect a bunch of people from all over the world, who have never met you, to do it for you.
2006-11-08 00:17:34 · answer #10 · answered by tntstroup 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋