I've decided that I'm ready to start trying to conceive. But I'm not sure on how to bring this up to my boyfriend, he lost a child several years ago and I think this may be a bit touchy for him. Also he's 38 and I'm worried that he may think he's too old. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
2006-11-07 22:26:40 · 6 answers · asked by amanda 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
You really should get married first but I have no room to talk. All you can do is tell him you want a child and if he truly loves you he will give you a child.
2006-11-07 22:38:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can understand that you feel uncomfortable in having this chat with your boyfriend. Im proud of you though for wanting to have a discussion with him and not just get pregnant and make him deal with it. so with that said.
Tell him the things about him that you see, and that make you want to have his child, tell him how much it would mean to you to be able to carry his child and look into the eyes of the child the two of you made. That you want to be the mother of his child and its a yearning that makes you love him more then you thought you ever could. If he mentions the lose of his child, tell him that you understand his feelings and that you have thought long and hard about it, that being part of the reason you havnt talked to him about this yet. as for his age, Men are more mature and usually financially stable at his age, to have a family.
I wish for you all the best, and if he isnt interested in having a family, you must consider yourself and your feelings towards having a family.
2006-11-08 15:17:57 · answer #2 · answered by Why? ... 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see your problem. I would be as open and as candid as you can. Tell him the reasons why you want a child. Explain to him that you do not want to replace the child that he lost. However, you will be in the situation I was with my ex. If a baby is VERY important to you, and they dont want to have one.. then you have a decision on your hands. Which is more important. I knew that I wanted a baby bad, and I would eventually hold a grudge for him "keeping me " from it. SO I left. It all depends on how much you want one. Do not give an ultimatum, but express your needs and wants with him. Give him time to think about it... he has alot to sort out. Good Luck!
2006-11-08 07:25:54 · answer #3 · answered by WestWife 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the best approach is to be honest with him, if he really loves you he will understand i mean what could be the worst him to say he isnt ready and thats what you expected so then you wait until he is ready... Pain of a loss never leaves someones side and this thing or person can never be replaced and thats something you need to except but to love something that is a part of you could help him become stronger with getting over his loss...you are never to old to have a family i dont think so you go for it and tell him how you feel just be honest and the words will flow....GOOD LUCK
2006-11-08 06:39:15 · answer #4 · answered by Belle 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you aren't comfortable even bringing up the subject it sounds like you two aren't ready to bring a baby into the relationship. In addition, marriage is a good idea prior to having a child. A child deserves two mature, responsible, married adult parents who have the ability to communicate.
Good Luck.
2006-11-08 10:41:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
in my mind u r never to old to have children. they will carry on your name for many gererations to come, and bring so much joy to your life.
2006-11-08 08:46:01 · answer #6 · answered by greengrass 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋