Does anyone know whether or not grandparents have successfully won visitations rights to see their grandchild?

Question

I have written before and asked for advice regarding my son and daughter-in-law being so stubborn and refusing to visit us. Things have really escalated, but I've found out that my DIL's parents (who they live with), have banned us from seeing our grandchild, the mother in law reads my private e-mails to my son, and the father in law controls all of their money issues.
My husband and myself have not seen my son and grandson in over 2 months now and it appears as though we never will. What caused all this? I sent my son an e-mail that discussed that I wanted to be able to see the three of them on at least SOME of the holidays because for the last 4 years they have been together, they have NEVER visited us on any holiday whatsoever. They always spend it with her parents and I suggested that we could see them one year and her parents the next year. This letter, which actually had tons of "I love you" written to both of them and was actually not bad, caused a huge uproar.

The reaction to the e-mail was that my DIL mother called me a "delusion, psychoid(?), bi*** and banned me and my husband from her home. My son came to pick up some things they were storing here and then I was told that my son and DIL and HER family would not be able to forgive me for a very long time and that I can't see my son or grandson!!!
I've had an operation since then and my son did not even call for that!!
My stress level is at an all time high and now I don't know if I should contact a lawyer for visitation rights or if that would make things worse.

SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY PLEASE..THIS IS VERY HURTFUL TO ME, SO PLEASE DON'T ADD TO THAT HURT JUST FOR A JOKE....THANKS

Answer 1

I don't know how much of this is comon I got to this site because my daughter threatens us with not seeing her one year old son at times that are not to her liking. Though she lived here during her pregnancy and I watched My precious boy while she was in school and paid all the bills until just a few months ago, she had moved out with her boyfriend and when that didn't work out she came back here, we are trying to work through it also, I am sorry for your pain, I can't imagine going more than a week with out seeing my little one, I have even a rougher time seeing my grand daughter who's mother is not with my son anymore and lives an hour away.And her new boyfriend is giving her a hard time about our involvement in thier life though It is not my wish to cause any trouble just to hold that sweet babygirl sometimes. I am diligently searching here in maine for my grandparent rights. Funny how you have to fight for the right to love your grandchildren.. I will pray for you and your healing in this. MomO

Answer 2

I have been in a similar situation, just from the opposite side. I won' t go into the many details of my situation, lets just say that there actually are people out there that DON'T deserve to be grandparents, and I was able to prove it.. They took me to court for forced visitation of my oldest son and lost. (The case was actually thrown out of court. They didn't take it back to court, because of the evidence I had in my favor.)

When those first legal papers came in the mail, that just added fuel to the fire. That was the straw that broke the camels back, so to speak and I was able to distance myself and my family from them. I have since heard that they are glad for this also. But I digress...my advice is, if there is ANY hope at all for this to be settled another way, I think it should be. You don't want the legal system to help drive a bigger wedge between you and your son and his family. That will only cause more harm.

I know that you miss them. I also know that you love them. You will eventually have them back in your life, just give them a little distance to think things out.

Good luck with your situation, and God Bless.

Answer 3

Well sounds to me like your son needs to reclaim his manhood there is no excuse for him allowing his wife and her family to treat you like that you gave him life..... As far as visitation with the grandchild i do not know what state you are in but in my state Arkansas Grandparents have no rights at all check with an attorney most have a free first time office visit

Answer 4

I have a similar problem with my son and granddaughter. Its not quite as bad as yours. I do get to see my granddaughter but only at her mothers discretion. I don't like her mother and I don't like the way my granddaughter is being raised and my son lets her have the say because he doesn't want to cause trouble between them. It isn't that he agrees with her, he just keeps the peace. I could throw a ten-thousand dollar fit and drive a deeper wedge between us, but I keep my mouth shut and take whatever time I get with her and cherish every moment. It's not that I don't sympathize with you and understand your pain, but your son is grown and gone and your grandson is not property. You have no legal right to him. If I were you, I would try to do whatever it takes to prove to them you love your grandson and would be a positive influence in his life. If they still won't let you see him, pray for God's help. Pray every day. Never underestimate the power of prayer.

Answer 5

Looks to me like there's going to be a falling out. There is dissention and mistrust over there and eventually it will explode. Sooner or later you're son's going to have to excape the fallout and guess where he will come running? Just wait for it. Don't bother reasoning with the unreasonable. Let them destroy themselves.

Answer 6

Here in Canada their a law saying that parents cannot stop grandparent from seeing their grandkids....hope there something like that in your country