I think about suicide...I'm sure way too often...but I feel too ashamed & shy to speak up so what should I do

Question

(Just backround info. if it helps!:
I've been and still am being abused by my family. This person whom I thought to be my friend tried to rape me. I'm failing out of highschool (in my Sr. year) because I can't cope with the stress...of everything. ...and then I have a mother with no backbone...oh yea and my dads a drunk, so I don't wan anything to do with him anyway.

I feel and it seems like only the little whiney emo kids are suicidal, so I feel like such a wuss (a wimp). Like I don't even deserve to feel this way. I don't want to be compared to all the other teens that cut themselves or are troubled. Not that I don't show sympathy for them, its just that from what I can tell (and the people I know) they do it just for attention; and I don't.

I'm worried what others will think of me.
Like I'm a ragdoll and that I come from...nothin'!
And I'm scared to really do anything on my own...even though I'm 18. :(

BUT PLEASE BE NICE AND MATURE WITH ANSWERS!

Answer 1

First whatever I say don't take it to heart. I would hate to say something that would make it worse. This seems to be a very sensitve subject and I don't want you to necessarily follow what I say. Visit your guidance counselor or one of your teachers. Do you have any friends that you do trust? Really the best thing you can do is talk to someone. Find someone you trust enough to let into your life or your situation. Whenever you feel suicidal it is always helpful to talk to someone you trust or who knows you. I feel for you and will pray for you. And I'm sorry about whats going on .

Answer 2

I know how you're feeling more than most know. There is a lot about my life that ost people don't know. Let me just tell you this even though you can't see it right now there is a reason for your life. I know also the shame and fear you feel when put in a position to talk about this kind of thing but you want so badly to release the pressure. Fight the feelings of guilt, fear, and shame and talk to someone. A counselor at school would be a good place to start. Don't hold back either get it off your chest. It will be hard the first time but you will soon look forward to the time to release. It's your Senior year you need to be putting yourself into a position to leave your current situation behind. It is possible and the student counselor at your school should be able to be a great help. There is hope you just need some support and an ear right now.

You see I too came from a really screwed up abusive home life and my friends brother tried to rape me and I barely made it through high school. The only thing that kept me going was the chance to get out of the situation. You have that chance even if you don't see it right now. God has a plan for you sweetie and live for you to touch, don't give up now.

Answer 3

You're in a really difficult situation. I grew up in a similar situation...a drunk dad, abusive brothers, no-spine mother and didn't think there was any answer. That's just not true. Can you talk to your counselor at school? Maybe not. But there are people who will help you. Try calling a safe house for abused women or a rape counselor...if they can't help they can refer you to someone who can. I really think the safe house is probably a good option for you.

You are not a wimp and none, I repeat, NONE of this is your fault. I can relate to feeling like suicide is your only escape but it's not. Call 911 or a hospital, they can help you get out of your situation and if you need it prescribe meds that can help with the stress and anxiety. You are not feeling this way for attention....Why would you? You don't come from nothing...you've grown up in a crappy situation but you've made it this far. That takes real strength. It's okay to be scared that's normal.

People will listen to you if you give them a chance. If you want to e-mail me you can. Call someone don't suffer in silence anymore. You deserve more. You're worth more.

Answer 4

You have already answered some of your own questions.
1. you are not a rag, 2 Your smart enough to know what you don't want 3. You care about yourself.
Let me just say this, I was in your shoes at one time. Not same situation but just as bad. I sat down one day and wrote down on a piece of paper all the good things I am. Then I wrote all the things I didn't like about myself. Then I asked myself why ??
I was a good person I was intelligent, so why am I being stupid enough to allow others to bring me down. I stood up and I said I was sick and tired of being sick and tired and that I am woth something. I then proceeded to let those who where trying to hurt me know that its NO MORE. You can't do this anymore I won't stay and have you do the things I don't like anymore. STOP THEM IN THEIR TRACTS. You are worth more than this. You will find out that in the long run you will be respected more for your opinions and feelings when you finally get sick and tired of being sick and tired. AND don't let the thought of hurting someones feelings get in your way. You also have a heart and whats fair is fair. They will get over it and you my friend will be a happier person when you take control and stop letting others use you as a door mat. Stand up for yourself. You will reach a point of being really sick and tired. Beat them by becoming the person you want to be proud of. Stop worring what other people think. You are better than that just look in the mirror you are a kind, loving , caring individual that deserves more. Give yourself some credit change is in order, do something. stop feeling sorry for yourself and show the world you are somebody. HUGS Hope this opens your eyes for a new begining. forget the drunks the abusers do something about it. you'll figure it out just get sick and tired enough to do what you need to do and keep your sanity.Life is to short to waste it on losers. Be a winner, you can do this..

Answer 5

Look chickie, school counsellors and teachers are lame, don't go to them for help. What you need to do is call a hotline, pick one out of the phone book. That is the first step. Go to a women's shelter or crisis center. They have people there who can really help you. It's all on your own terms too. You are not obligated to do anything or take their advice if you don't want to. That's the best I can do for you right now. I hope you live a long and happy life once you get through this. It can happen, it did for me.

Answer 6

Just remember that all things pass and you can get a job and move out. If you are 18 and failing school, why don't you get a job and go take your GED. That is what I did. I am 35 now and I own my own business. Think forward a couple of years and just imagine what you can do with your life instead of dwelling on what is going on in the present. You have the power to change it.

Answer 7

Taking your life is not the answer can you talk to a teacher don't be embarrassed they are there to help you if you cant do you have someone to ring like a help line you can be anonymous please ask for help you will feel a lot better if you do it will take time you are not nothing you are somebody somebody that has a lot of life to live and love. there are people who do care and I am one of them so please ask for help I know you can do it
ther is a poem about aelf worth and it is called Im special
I'm special. In all the world there is noboby like me.
Since the beginning of time there has never been another person like me. Nobody has my eyes,my nose,my hair, my hands, my voice. I'm special
Nobody anywhere has my tastes for food or music or art. Noone sees things just as I do.
In all of time, there has been no one who laughs like me, no one who cries like me. And what makes me laugh and cry will never provoke identical laughter and tears from anybody else, ever.
No one reacts to any situation just as I would react, I'm special.
No one in the universe can reach the quality of my combination of talent, ideas, abilities and feelings. Like a room full of muscical instruments, some may excel alone, but none can match the symphony sound when all are played together. I'm a symphony.
Through all of eternity no one will ever look, talk, think, or do like me. I';m special, I'm rare.
I'm special. And I'm beginning to realise it's no accident that I'm special. I'm beginning to see that God made me special for a very special purpose. He must have a job for me that no one else can do as well as I. Out of all the billions of applicants, only one is qualified, only one has the right combination of what it takes. That one is me.
Because ......
I'M SPECIAL!
believe it you are read this over and over againn to see that you are special!

Answer 8

Hi, dear. Know what, life's all what we have. I do understand ur situation. Though I never experienced that, my problem may seemed too big compared to what you are having right now. But remember, God doesn't give us any problem bigger enough for us to carry. He knows we can carry it.
Suicide is the last recourse I could turn to even in my dreams. That's more o psychological. Suicide is not the solution. My advise is, turn to God, He is the only one who can help you right now. Instead of feeling stress, help urself, stand up, carry it. Focus urself into something that might help u in the future. U can do better than anything.. Problems are just problems.

Answer 9

You must talk to a trusted teacher or guidance councilor. This is a problem too big for you to take on. Yes they will contact authorities and Foster care may be what happens but being safe and alive is worth it. There are people who really care and will help you . But they can't until asked . So ask.

Answer 10

You need to talk to someone.....preferably a health professional as soon as possible. NOW. try a help line...one for teens if you would feel more comfortable. But you are not weak or a wuss. You show courage just by asking for help. You are worth it. if there isn't anyone you can trust...trust in yourself. And you are not alone..please just hold one, there are people who care about you... Me for one...start here . I care..and so do alot of others ..wait for your answers you will be surprised! maybe even find the one person you can really talk to. Please honey, hold on...help will come.