My last question stated my 29yr old horrible step-daughter problem, well now she is snooping in my things. My 12yr old caught her when I was not home. And her father was outside. I have kept my mouth shut about all this to her father, because she is such a good liar, and manipulator she would turn it all around on my daughter. I never knew that she was this way before I met my partner. She lived in Calif. and just recently moved here. Her mother is just as bad. So I have 2 forces against me. I am really layed back and a loving, caring person. She even has went as far to let me know that she has successfully run off all of her daddys girlfriends. How can I get her father see what is going on, but by her tripping up and getting cought red-handed in her scheme.
2006-11-07 14:53:05 · 22 answers · asked by kachine 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
she is 29yrs old? that alone would drive me nuts!!!! What an immature supposid adult to be living with daddy at 29 for god sakes!!! Get her and your husband in the same room and flat out tell her in front of him, "you may be his daughter, but I AM his WIFE, and I know you have been snooping through my things when I wasn't home, and you have no right".....the look on her face should be evidence enough, that is if your husband isn't stupid, or spineless. Sorry, but 29yrs old, she needs to be out of there, or move in with mommy. I wouldn't tolerate it for one more minute!!!! I could just imagine what drama she stirs up. And I don't even live with you, but I know how some people are, and she sounds like one of those who has to have some sort of drama or chaos to bring attention to herself. Get her out asap!!!!
2006-11-07 15:12:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Up front and honest are always the best policies. You're husband needs to understand that you are his wife and you need to be respected as such. While parents relationships with their children are very important so is the spouses. I'd also put locks on doors or get a hidden camera-just don't let anyone know until you have the evidence. I would remind her that she is a quest in your home. After all she is 29yrs. old. Don't let her scare you like saying she chases his girlfriends away, it's another part of her manipulation.
2006-11-07 15:13:52 · answer #2 · answered by OcenGirl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The thing is ...she is always going to be his daughter and right or wrong and ranks higher than you in his eyes (he can't help that no more than you can help loving your daughter). I can understand what you are going through. I think the only way is to ask her at the dinner table with dad present to respect your privacy as an adult and that you will respect hers. Most likely there will be many fights before the truth is revealed. Hopefully she will get itchy feet and move somewhere far away. Sorry to tell you this but my dad has lost about 5 women because my sister physically abused them. I don't think anything will ever change her....just a bad seed.
2006-11-07 15:00:40 · answer #3 · answered by auntynoall 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why do you feel that you need to trip her up? come out and say it. tell her father what she has been doing. tell him that you are not going to put up with this. also why on earth is a 29 yr. old living with you? she should be out on her own. she knows what she is doing so, tripping her up could take a long time. i say go to her dad tell him and then if the two of you agree set a trap.to prove that this is what she is doing. it will prove it to him even though he was a part of the trap. maybe after the two of you talk, set a trap where you make it seem that you are having an affair with someone. write some letters and hide them where you know she is snooping. and because she will think you are doing this offal thing to her father she will say something. then he will know for sure what you told him is true. then i would tell her she has to go.
2006-11-07 22:09:47 · answer #4 · answered by here to help 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get everyone together that lives under your roof and let them know that as husband and wife you and your husband are a united front and that that anyone living under your roof has to contribute to the mutual benefit of your family. She is banking on the fact that you will complain to your husband about her and drive a rift between the two of you. You need to show her a strong front. Let her know that breaking the two of you up is not an option.
If you want to talk to your husband alone I suggest approaching it from the angle that you are concerned that step daughter doesn't like or respect you and since she is living in your house you want to know how to earn her respect so that you can have a peaceful family. Ask him for suggestions and ask him to be specific and follow through. You won't look like the hateful step mother and if she doesn't warm up to you when he sees you making effort to mend things with her, she will look bad. At that point you have earned the right to say she is harming your family life and endangering your marriage and she needs to think about finding a new place to live.
2006-11-07 15:13:19 · answer #5 · answered by BLANK 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Buy some sexy unwear to wear for you husband make a big deal about it so she knows place a metal moustrap under the sexy underwear in a draw let her go through the draw when your not there her fingers will hurt and hopefully be marked tell your own daughter to stay away lets see if she talks her way out of this one.
2006-11-07 15:07:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't believe that you are laid-back and loving and caring when you call this woman HORRIBLE.
You should ask her not to go through your things. If she refuses you should do what you'd do if anyone went though your things without your permission.
You can install a camera, but leave the 12 year old out of this. She's the only one who should be immature in your household. Let her deal with her own child problems.
If you have the woman snooping around your stuff on film, what exactly will that do for you, though?
2006-11-07 14:57:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Tell her father. He might just believe you. In the mean time anything you don't want her snooping around your stuff, keep everything under lock & key. Also you can plant something that your partner knows to be false & try to catch her in a lie.
2006-11-07 14:58:51 · answer #8 · answered by pmz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh no you probably did no longer!!!! you could desire to take a deep breath, calm down and get an entire life of your guy or woman somewhat of snooping on different human beings. Play with hearth - you're gonna get burned! and you probably did! You needless to say hate your loved ones and your "stable for no longer something husband" (your words, no longer mine) so why the hell might you % the others to flow and depart the two considered one of you on your lives???? seems to me you % all of them long gone! advance up, initiate being well mannered and flow on! heavily!
2016-10-21 11:14:31 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
For a start you are taking the word of a 12 year old and that is wrong ..if you think she is in your stuff catch her red handed and deal with it with your husband.
2006-11-07 21:02:54 · answer #10 · answered by blue_eyed_woman_of_3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋