I have made comments on my girlfriends weight. Is it wrong for a guy to comment on their partners physical appearance in the event that the partner has: 1. Chosen to let themselves get out of shape. 2. Claims they are working on it but their actions (such as attempting to work out, no diff. in weight) says otherwise.
Is physical appearance important in a relationship?... and is it wrong to point out or state my concern to her? She says I point it out a lot, but I point it out because she's not doing anything to fix it. Hence, she is concerned about her weight, and insecure about the stability of our relationship, rightfully so, because I have voiced concern over her physical appearance. Her weight issues make me less sexually attracted to her, causing less sexual desire How can you love somebody you have stopped being attracted to? If I am simply not attracted to overweight (no insult intended) people, and she's not doing anything to fix it, what should i do
2006-11-07 12:36:40 · 9 answers · asked by Sweet Revelation 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Shallow!? You show me a girl that would take a fat nerdy looking guy with a great personality, vs a good looking attractive looking guy who also has a great personality. So far, the advice sucks. I can't change what i'm attracted to. So how is it wrong? Girls say one thing but their actions do another. Girls make moral judgements of what should be done, or the way something should be, but then turn around and contradict themselves. Aren't I lowering my standards if I'm with a girl who isn't on my level anymore and her fatness doesn't make me attracted to her? What about the judgement by other people like "why is he with her" or from a females point "why is she with him."
2006-11-08 08:40:16 · update #1
Wow. Where do I begin? First, don't ever mention her "weight" again, or you'll burn in hell. Second, express that you want her to be healthy and to feel good about herself. Third, try to get her excited about some kind of class. I found that Bikram Yoga really helped me get back into shape after gaining 68 lbs with my pregnancy. I felt just awful about my weight. My husband, of course, always told me (and still does) how beautiful I am everyday, regardless of what the scale said that day. Helping your girlfriend feel attractive and loved will help her to be motivated to love herself enough to be healthy. Remember it's not just exercise, it's diet too. Make sure when you eat together that you are eating well-balance nutritious meals full of fresh fruits, vegetable and whole grains. Sounds like your girl needs to work on getting her body healthy, and you may need to work on getting your mind healthy. She deserves someone who will love her no matter what she looks like. Remember that looks will fade, no matter what. There's got to be something else to your relationship or it will surely not survive. When you are 80, you will look 80. What if she's not attracted to old farts??? What will you do then? Good luck.
2006-11-07 12:46:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you need to grow up and stop being shallow. What you need is a hot chick that you are attracted to (and so is everyone else) and she'll sleep around on and not give a damn about anything else including you. Looks isn't the only thing. She needs to break up with you and find a real man that will treat her right.
2006-11-07 12:42:49 · answer #2 · answered by briansbutterflygirl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok, dude, re-read what you just wrote under details!!! Seriously, if you feel no 'sexual attraction' then why should you care? Relationships are about more than just sex! If you don't like her for what she really is, then what's your problem?!?!?! It's her issue if she doesn't want to lose weight, and you shouldn't be the one who's telling her she's fat!!! In a relationship, you should be helping to boost her self-esteem instead of insulting her everyday! Seriously, what's your problem!?!?!?
2006-11-07 12:41:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-15 12:25:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ur a very tactless person. it is a MORTAL SIN in a relationship to comment on your girl's weight!!
U know u dont have to tell her she's fat more than once. she'll remember that for sure. but it's not an easy job losing weight so cut her some slack.
one last thing, QUIT BEING SHALLOW.
2006-11-07 12:40:47 · answer #5 · answered by zarbhebz_1012@sbcglobal.net 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Seen the movie shallow hal??? She was huge- and usually griping at someone about there wt makes it worse- when they are an emotional eater- she could join wt. watchers- it is about 13 bucks a wk- I lost 50 lbs- and it helps make one aware of what u eat- and you eat regular food- nothing special to buy- D
2006-11-07 12:58:05 · answer #6 · answered by Debby B 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your very shallow.
What she heard was, If your looks change because you had my baby, I will leave you. When your body changes due to old age, I will leave you. It does not matter what you are on the inside, it will never be enough. I will leave you. If I just get tired of looking at you and you have become common place, I will leave you.
I don't know what she sees in your sorry a*s*s. If she had any self esteem at all, she would have told you to go screw yourself.
2006-11-07 12:46:32 · answer #7 · answered by Mr Cellophane 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Is this a serious relationship? B/c if it is, it doesn't seem like you loved her, as her. It sounds like you should talk about the relationship with your girlfriend. And its not your fault you're not attracted to her, but obviously this isn't love...good luck
2006-11-07 12:43:20 · answer #8 · answered by oopsydaisy500 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you only look at the outside whats gonna happen when you cant get it up anymore is a girl gonna dump you ...i think you are shallow to think that way but maybe im wrong
2006-11-07 12:41:17 · answer #9 · answered by acierman2006 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋