How do you deal with insecurity when you are dating a guy?

Question

I am dating a guy I think is great. He tells me he likes spending time with me and that he thinks I am pretty. I believe what he says. But there are times when I have such insecure thoughts, like he will break up with me. If he doesn't e-mail me back within a day, I think I will never hear from him again. I know these thoughts are silly, I just wanted to see if anyone else felt this way and how they deal with insecure thoughts.

Answer 1

i have the same feelings they dont go away for me

Answer 2

He may be a good guy, and he tells you these things, but I would be careful. Don't let your insecurities push or scare him away. Have a little patience, a little understanding that he too has a life outside of your relationship. Respecting that will get you a lot further than suffocating him. When you get those thoughts, find something else to do to occupy your time...read a book, call some girlfriends go out for a 'girls night out', anything that will occupy those thoughts of insecurity. I hope this works for you!

Answer 3

hey, your not alone, we all do this. this a normal feeling that women get because there are so many men out there that do things to make you feel insecure about relationships. the best thing to do is try to keep busy and not think about the relationship too much. the more you think about a situation the more you will find something wrong and come up with all kind of senarios about what is really going on. women tend to over think relationships and cause more problems then are necessary.

just give your mind a rest and go out with girlfriends and make sure that your boyfriend is not your only social outing. it's important to keep a social life that doesn't envolve him. and trust me, the more you ACT like your not interested in what he's doing(even though you really are) the more HE'LL make the effort to include you in his life. hope this helps. good luck.

Answer 4

I'm a guy and have the same problem with my new fiance. So far, the only thing I've done is talk to people I can trust about it and get their advise. The last thing I'm going to do is run to her about it and make myself look like a little *****. I think bettedaviseyes gave you good advise; try to distract yourself from those thoughts until you can be with him again.

Answer 5

Sounds like fear of abandonment issues. Same here. I think it started with not seeing my father when I was a kid. Haven't seen him now in 27 yrs. Have you tried some counseling ?