All of my mates are boasting about there girl friends and I dont have one, partly because of apperance and also confidance. I dont know where to start, but confidance around girls inst good, I dont have much experiance, and never had sex! Please help
2006-11-07 04:33:06 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
contrary to popular belief, confidence doesn't come from "having sex" ...... it is way beyond that. let's say u have had sex, but u still feel uncomfortable about ur body or something, ur back to the drawing board when ur single again.
so, my advice to u First before u even get in a relationship, is to work on Yourself. your confidence will translate to Way more in ur life; urself, ur ability to speak to others, ur relationships w/ family, friends, teachers, peers, even strangers, and THAT will lead u to find a good person, and THAT will eventually lead u to sex! :) not that it's ur "goal" per se, but what my point is that u need to learn how to be Happy, Positive, and Healthy on ur own two feet, which makes u attractive to others, and it won't matter whether or not u have sex or not, and will open many doors for you.
SO: work on your Appearance! exercise, work out, take care of ur face, hair and body. try on new flattering clothes, get a new hairstyle, etc. the better u feel about your Looks, the less you will feel uncomfortable or shy around girls or guys!
Next: work on your Mind! study, read more, learn more, learn about current events, and excel at hobbies and interests. the more you Know, the more u will have to say in conversations!
Finally: work on your Relationships! first ur family and close friends.... speak out more, be your fun self! practice your new style and knowledge with them... slowly put urself out there with friends of friends at parties, be confident, happy, and comfortable, easy to talk to. speak out more in classes, get to know ur teachers, or if u have a job, work hard and get to know the managers and other co workers. remember, since u are not as stressed about ur looks and ur ability to talk about different things, u will have more opportunities to put in ur two cents! :)
it's a process, won't happen overnight. but trust me, the better u feel about urself, the easier it will be for u to meet new friends and stuff! good luck~~~
2006-11-07 04:42:08 · answer #1 · answered by sasmallworld 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, I was the same way at your age. I was 25 before I was married, and had never dated much. I was a nerd (still am I guess) and not real attractive, so I knew I had to take action. I updated my clothes, and made sure that I dressed neatly. I started visiting churches and other get togethers. I enlisted a couple of trusted friends to help me meet girls. I met some really nice girls. It was trying at first, but as I gained a little confidence, I began to open up and be myself. One day, I met the girl of my dreams in a most unlikely place (supermarket) - we have been married for 35 years. It wasn't all easy, but you just have to be determined about making a change. Good luck on your quest - there is some nice girl out there waiting for the opportunity to meet you.
2006-11-07 12:45:37 · answer #2 · answered by Doug R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The never having sex part isn't exactly a bad thing. But it takes time to get comfortable around girls, my best friend has the same problem. You'll come into it on your own. Once you find that first special girl, it'll get easier from there on.
2006-11-07 12:37:03 · answer #3 · answered by Diagonal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh you poor thing!!!!! all i have to say is to just talk to a girl who you feel really comfortable with. start conversations hang out more be creative funny nice etc. and if appearance bothers you than a new look always helps someone. not to be mean but a new look will work out for you it does for anyone. be patient your tI'me will come be yourself im sure your an interesting guy.
2006-11-07 12:38:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
poor thing all u have to do is talk to the girl u like and later ask her out. i have no confidence but i still talk to the one i like but just be urself and someone will notice ur a great guy and like u too. just be a little patiant
2006-11-07 12:36:34 · answer #5 · answered by Shortie<3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok you need to loosen up around girls and sex is not a biggie a least not for you yet f=girls dont like tight guys and try to be yourself and stay in style
2006-11-07 12:36:06 · answer #6 · answered by braves2rule 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you need to make some "girl" friends. Just like buddies. They are the BEST! at this kind of thing. Who knows, maybe they'll create a WHOLE NEW YOU?!
2006-11-07 12:35:41 · answer #7 · answered by bevey_jane263 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are you? Anyway, if u wanna become confident then the first step is LEARN THE SPELLING.
2006-11-07 12:36:04 · answer #8 · answered by Bond girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋