2006-11-07 04:28:28 · 15 answers · asked by 13th Floor 6 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I'm afraid that that would appear callous and discourteous, ma'am.
Being a Friend, you'd be expected to display concern for the unfortunate loss.
Besides, it would be unnatural for someone to try to look away from it, ma'am.
I'd say, be natural and don't hesitate to show you care.
Have a nice day.
2006-11-07 04:59:53 · answer #1 · answered by Daimyo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are pretty close friends with the person, chances are that you probably knew that they were sick or something, so it won't be a complete surprise to you. With a person you have a history of friendship with, it wouldn't be completely awful for you to acknowledge it like, "I didn't realize your arm was gone. So, what's new?" (Depending on your sense of humor, you can even make a joke out of it.) If the person wants to tell you about the circumstances of the amputation, they can, but if they don't, they won't.
If it's a person that you're not really friends with, no need to mention it.
2006-11-07 10:22:22 · answer #2 · answered by drshorty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Pretending not to notice would probably make them feel more uncomfortable. Living with only one arm is part of who that person is now. You don't have to make a point to mention it, but you can ask how things are going in their life and if you treat them the way you always did, the conversation will steer itself.
2006-11-07 04:33:39 · answer #3 · answered by stacye5398 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, you should immediately notice or risk looking like a fool. A simple "Neil, I haven't seen you in years!- My goodness, what happened?!" will suffice. Act completely shocked at whatever the explanation is, remark something along the lines of "Well that is awful!", then immediately follow it up with a change of subject, such as "How is your Mom doing?", or "Have you been back to the old school?" ... do not mention it again unless the person specifically brings it up, and be sure to tell them to take care of themselves at parting.
2006-11-07 05:17:35 · answer #4 · answered by Lirrain 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How can you pretend not to notice?
Just ask how it happened. They're probably used to being asked the question and have some sort of standard answer.
Be sensitive to how they answer. If it seems like they don't want to talk about it, don't. If they're ok, ask away. People always like talking about themselves.
2006-11-07 06:14:45 · answer #5 · answered by CandyCane 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO, you should not pretend anything. Just don't zone in on it. I'm sure you are not the first person they have confronted on the issue. Sometimes its just better to get it out in the open and over with.
2006-11-07 06:35:19 · answer #6 · answered by corinasanc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Greet them warmly (if you are happy to see them) and ask about their lives. If the person doesn't bring up the amputation, you don't have to.
2006-11-07 04:31:02 · answer #7 · answered by kja63 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think the honest, concerned question "What happened?" lets them tell you as much or as little as they are comfortable with.
OBVIOUSLY you are going to notice - and be curious - it's human nature.
Be polite & don't be pushy. Leave them the out if you want, and tell them, "You don't need to tell me, but ..." and if they don't choose to answer, don't ask again.
It's a strange world we live in, isn't it?
2006-11-07 04:38:07 · answer #8 · answered by tigglys 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, I would immediately ask "what happened to your arm!" is a warm and loving way though!
2006-11-07 04:31:09 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it's the right arm, don't go to shake their hand--they might not understand and take offence
2006-11-07 04:34:34 · answer #10 · answered by bandit 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋