My boyfriend broke up with his ex right before we started dating. Though they had dated for 3 years and lived together for 1, he said he'd really been out of love for the past 6 months. He did say, though, that she's a very good friend, and he wants to maintain that friendship. He met me after moving halfway across the country to go to school (so she's really far away). He's seen her once since we started dating (over break), and he says that he told her about me. I'm not sure, though, because he said she was really upset when he told her, and I found a few text messages from her on his phone, and she seemed really upbeat and happy. I know they talk a lot, but, then again, I talk with my ex a lot too. I'm worried that he might still be in love with her. What do you think?
2006-11-07 04:20:04 · 7 answers · asked by skichamonix515 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
When people are together that long, they usually do try to stay good friends if the break up wasn't horrible. I know many people who have successfully done this.
It's also hard to not have feelings for someone you were with that long, and who you lived with, but it does happen all the time. People do genuinly fall out of love. If these two were still in love, they would probably not have broken up.
The truth is, there really is no way of knowing for sure whether or not he still has feelings for his ex. You have to trust him, or your relationship will go badly. Without trust, there is no relationship.
Her texts to him may be upbeat, but it doesn't sound like they are romantic at all. He also has only seen her once, so it doesn't sound like you have too much to worry about. Just try to trust what he says and enjoy your relationship.
2006-11-07 04:25:03 · answer #1 · answered by Jitterbug 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well.. this is really hard for me to answer.
okay hunnie put it this way.. is he the same person as u?
is he a good man? a loyal one? faitful? does he seem to be the one?
does he treat u like a princess? if yes to all those questions. forget about their communication because they are just friends.
have u guys had have some bad encounters in the past?
has he cheated? does he lie? is he "playerish"? does he treat u good at some points?
then maybe you should start keeping your distance.
if he gets defensive about it when u talk to him
stand up. dont show him that ur scared. make it clear that shes either out of his future or u guys dont have no future.
2006-11-07 12:30:11 · answer #2 · answered by ily_______&?; 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have one question for you. Do you have trust in your relationship? If not...move on. I believe trust is one of the most important component when it comes to two people. You can also bring up your concern about this in a non pushy way and see how he reacts. But if you can't trust the one that you are with it's best to move on...
2006-11-07 12:30:27 · answer #3 · answered by tonaloha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I used to have this problem if it bothers you talk to him about it. Do you think you would be able to maintain a relationship with your ex on a friend basis and see him again and nothing happens. I didnt like my husband talking to his ex and he respected me enough to quit, but that doesnt mean i still talk to mine. If you want him to give her up you have to give up yours also.
2006-11-07 12:24:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
as long as you know they're not seeing each other then what are you worried about? she lives so far away it's not like he's meeting up with her secretly or anything. if it bothers you that much ask him if maybe he can reduce the number of times he talks to her....
2006-11-07 12:23:49 · answer #5 · answered by *KiM* 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you want him to stop his friendship with her so you could feel more secure while you continue yours with your ex.
2006-11-07 12:23:40 · answer #6 · answered by JC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds shady, you should talk to him.
2006-11-07 12:21:52 · answer #7 · answered by Hannah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋