God, I have a problem “
“ What’s the problem Eve “
“ I know that you created me and provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, as well as that hilarious comedic snake, but I’m just not happy “
“ And why is that Eve “ ?
“ God, I am lonely and bored and I’m sick to death of apples “
“ Well Eve, in that case I have a solution, I shall create a man for you “
“ Man ? What is that God ?”
“ A flawed base creature with many bad traits, he’ll lie, cheat and be vain, he will be witless and will revel in childish things, he’ll be bigger than you an will like fighting, hunting and killing things, he wont be too smart, so he will need your advice to think properly, he will have a very limited emotional capacity and will need to be trained. He will look silly when he is aroused but since you have been complaining, I’ll create him in such a way that he will satisfy your physical needs and you most certainly will never be bored again.”
“ Sounds great “ says Eve, with ironically raised eyebrows, “ but what’s the catch God ? “
“ Well, you can have him on one condition.”
“ And what’s that God? “
“ As I said, he’ll be proud, arrogant and self admiring….so you’ll have to let him believe I made him first, it will have to be our little secret “
“ You know….woman to woman !!!!! “
2006-11-06 23:10:30 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
yep...seems to have hit a raw nerve with the lads.....awwww shame !!!
2006-11-07 03:44:56 · update #1
ha, that sounds like MY wife... good one
2006-11-06 23:36:14 · answer #1 · answered by vitamin r 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Thats wicked.. Thumbs up Heres another one about men...
A man went to the doctor suffering from severe headaches. After a thorough examination, the doctor
turned to him and said: "Jerry, the good news is I can cure your headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration." "You have a very rare condition, which causes your testicles to press on your spine, and the pressure creates these serious headaches you've been experiencing. So the only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles."
Jerry was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. He couldn't concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he had no choice but to go under the knife.
When he eventually left the hospital Jerry was pleasantly surprised at how good it felt not to have a
headache for the first time in 20 years, but he also knew that he was missing an important part of himself.
As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person. He could make a fresh start and live a new life. He saw a men's clothing store and thought to himself a new suit would be the perfect thing to mark this new beginning.
He entered the shop and told the salesman: "I'd like a new suit."
The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said: "Let's see... size 44 long?"
"That's right, how did you know?" said Jerry, laughing.
"I've been in the business 60 years!" replied the tailor.
Jerry tried on the suit and it fitted like a glove. As Jerry admired himself in the mirror, the salesman
asked: "How about a new shirt?"
Jerry thought for a moment and then agreed.
The salesman eyed Jerry again.
"Let's see... 34 sleeve and 16-and-a-half neck?"
Once again, Jerry was surprised.
"That's right, how did you know?"
"Like I said, I've been in the business 60 years!"
So Jerry tried on the shirt, and it was a perfect fit. As Jerry adjusted the collar in the mirror, the salesman asked: "How about new shoes?" Jerry was on a roll and so thought, why not?
So the salesman eyed Jerry's feet and said: "Let's see... you must be a size nine-and-a-half?"
Jerry was astonished. "That's right, how did you know?"
"Well, young fella, I've been in the business long enough to know these things!"
Jerry tried on the shoes and they were also a remarkable fit. Jerry walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked: "So that only leaves the new underwear. How about it?"
Jerry thought for a second and agreed.
The salesman stepped back, eyed Joe's waist and said: "Let's see... size 36."
Jerry laughed. "Ah ha! I got you! I've worn size 34 since I was 18 years old."
The salesman shook his head. "There's no way. I'm never wrong. You can't wear a size 34."
"Oh yes I can," replied Jerry and have been most of my life.
"I don't understand," said the tailor. "By my reckoning a 34 underwear would press your testicles up
against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."
.
2006-11-08 05:03:52 · answer #2 · answered by miz Destiny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice joke but, what the hell are you talking about? Only 2 or 3 people complained about it so that means all guys dislike this? Oh, and it's a joke... you put it in the joke section. Does this imply that you yourself think it's false? What? What's that? I believe it does. Oh and on somewhat of a random note... anyone that uses the acronym "ROFLMAO" or any altered form of it...is a dumbass and they should eat **** and die. Seriously though I liked the joke.
2006-11-07 14:16:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Feminist joke, but great! LOL
This only proves that God must be a woman.
2006-11-08 04:35:40 · answer #4 · answered by . 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bit of a rant in the middle, but funny ending makes up for it. lol
2006-11-07 12:08:50 · answer #5 · answered by PAUL H 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Cleverrrrrrr!
2006-11-07 07:19:21 · answer #6 · answered by ♥c0c0puffz♥ 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Good one. Funny how it's only men who hate this joke. Why would that be
2006-11-07 09:44:58 · answer #7 · answered by st.uncumber 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Very-y-y interesting!
2006-11-07 07:22:55 · answer #8 · answered by ? 5 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Absolutely Brilliant. I like it, not sure the men will though.
2006-11-07 07:52:43 · answer #9 · answered by patsy 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Quality mate!
2006-11-07 07:21:13 · answer #10 · answered by Coyote 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Amen.
2006-11-07 07:14:06 · answer #11 · answered by Jeni-wren 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋