Between Two Choices, What Is Love?

Question

Before I begin, let me tell you something.

Don't give me any answers that are related in any way to the following
a) Subjective experiences without anything objective. I'm not a mind reader
b) Acronyms. Don't post things here unless you think you're going to get that 10 points. And acronyms, I assure you, won't.
c) Anything stupid. Use your own discretion based on my two other unwanted answer types.
_________

So.

I was pretty sure I knew what love was.

I had had this crush on a girl for... 6 years now.

And now this other girl comes into my life and i like her too.

I used to think they were two entirely different people, but apparently they're pretty close friends.



So now they're pretty much alike, and I like them both for the same reasons (some more for one, some more for the other).

How do I "choose" correctly?

is there a "right" way to do this?

Also, I don't think seniority has anything to do with this.

To keep their identities anonymous, let's call them A and X, A being the "senior" one and X being the other.

You know, I remember something from a book.

It's concept called "chaste".

If I keep having "chaste", how will i ever be able to choose?

What if those two same people go to the same college as me?

With other people that I probably will like also?

How will I do it?

Is there a "right" choice?

Or is it whoever came first?

Whoever is easiest?

Is this why people date so much and still get divorces?

And if I get rid of chaste.... won't I still have those exact same problems?

The concept of love implies that you and someone else like each other.

But I've never heard a part of it that actually explains who is better than another if you like more than one.

Alright, thanks for answering me on the "choosing" part.... but you're not justifying your answer by telling me what love is specifically and WHY it is that way.

Answer 1

To be honest with you. It is not about the choice of the two ladies. It is you. What you see in both these women is your ideal partner. You may not be able to make a choice because whichever one you choose will disappoint you a bit. But having a crush on someone for 6yrs is something to cherish. Do you feel guilty liking the new lady because you are so familiar with your 6yr crush? To make a choice I would be thankful to know what I want in a partner through meeting these 2 ladies and move on and find her. If I was to be with one of them I will have feelings for the other as you said, they are pretty close friends. So they both would always be in my life. And the same 'what if' would be running in my head.
Love is something you can't explain in words. It is a overwhelming feeling that will never die. It is knowing that you would do anything for that person and that you can picture yourself with them till death. Love is like sharing with someone happiness, pain, experiences. Love has no judgment. You can love many people at the same time but you only fall in love one at a time.

Answer 2

I think you are talking about like and not love. There is an Elizabeth Barret Browning sonnet, which I will add a link to here, that says love is only love when it is for its own sake. You are saying you like certain things in one or the other in various degrees, but this is just one part of what makes love. I think the trick with love is when you love that person despite the things you do NOT like about them. Love is not a matter of degree, it is something you say this person has this much of it and so I love her. It is not easy or light most of the time, it requires hard work and so love is when you are willing to put up with all the attendant nonsense that comes with being human in another person. I mean I like bread and butter, and I also like bread and jam, for mainly the same reasons but I would never remember them and smile in the middle of a totally unrelated activity. The point is, with love you cannot "choose" because if you love, the problem is you cannot really.

http://www.frazmtn.com/~bwallis/lovlost.htm

Answer 3

Love could nicely be very thrilling for a youthful female! i think of i'm going to be waiting to assist! So it sounds such as you're on the area the place you're snoozing around a lot. 2 adult men on the bypass and be an quite sticky mess, and the single situation you do no longer prefer to enable take place is enable them to make certain approximately one yet another. you have gotten your self a "combat-to-the-dying" form duel on your hands in the event that they do or a lot greater possibly the two one in all them may even see what form of female you relatively are and leave you. I say basically shop having exciting for now and getting as a lot in you because it is likewise possible to as your nevertheless youthful because of the fact once you attain 30-40, no person is gonna wanna beef that, so have your exciting on an analogous time as you nevertheless can girlie! -LOVE PATCHES

Answer 4

Liking someone does'nt mean you're in love with them. Love is more than liking, it's a deep feeling towards the person you love. How do you prove which one you really love? Even if that person hurts you, you'll still have that same feeling of love towards her.

Just give it time, be patient, dont rush things. Time only will tell whom you love among the two. For more details about love, if you're a christian, even if you're not, read The Bible, the book of 1st Corithians chapter 13. It tells us all about true love.

Wish you well.

Answer 5

if you have liked this other girl for 6 years now why are you not already with her? there must be something keeping you apart. either she has always been involved with someone or else she dose not return your feelings. this other girl dose she return your feelings? love is not about who comes first.

close your eyes and picture your life without girl A. how do you feel. now do the same with girl X how do you feel?
which one makes your heart pound almost brings a tear to your eye if you think of loosing her. thats your answer
hope this helps, i didn't know to many details
good luck

Answer 6

you begin with the word "crush"...i had this dilemma a few years back..what?closing your eyes and just imagining without girl A or girl B wont work, you have to act on it.. the only thing I did is to be more close with both of them..spending more time with the two of them and that's when I get to know them more...and then I discovered that they are far more different from each other and that's when I made my choice..I was never wrong, until now we are still together...

Answer 7

If you like them both,but for different reasons then surely you're not in love with either of them enough to choose between them. Let them both go and move on to someone who entirely fits your ideal partner.

Answer 8

Between the two given choices, NONE of them is love. Sorry, don't have time to elaborate (don't want the 10 pnts)/ Just trust me on this one.

Answer 9

Dude if their friends like you say, your gonna end up hurting one bad, or your gonna end up with none of them. So you should prolly pick the one you been dealing with longer. But no matter what, if you get one of them, one of them is getting hurt and your gonna feel like ****. No matter what your screwed. Sorry.

Answer 10

i'm sure you love neither.. love can only have one...
you can love all you dogs, but you will have one favourite...
love, when it comes to human, you will like all, but love only one..
choose the one you really love most and is comfortable with...
choose the one that you think if she's no longer around , you will kill yourself...
choose the one you communicate the best, and you can accept all her flaws....