He is the best but sometimes he can be sorta controlling/jelious. How can I prove to him that I'm not going to cheat on him and that I really do love him? And get him not to be so controlling. Whats hould I do?
2006-11-06 17:52:35 · 13 answers · asked by XOXO Brittany 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Everytime he tries to control you, do not try to explain. Make a sad and hurt face and look away. You may pout a little too. Do not say anything, even when he asks once or twice. Then, relent a little, look into his eyes and say seriously, "You don't know how you hurt me with that insecurity of yours. I love yo so much and your doubts hurt me. That shows that you can never trust me." Stop and refuse to say anything more. Then, perhaps some other time, say similar things like, "You will never believe me, will you?", "I doubt that you never really trust me.", "Is that insecurity behind your statement or do you really think that I will do something to hurt you?" Perhaps, slowly, your sincerity will win him and he will learn that being a controlling freak, will just make you more distant, sad and difficult to communicate rather than trying to explain to him, you feeling guilty or something. May be, he learns with time. Wait for at least a year and study whether his behavior changes towards positive or negative, before getting committed.
2006-11-06 18:02:20 · answer #1 · answered by Smriti 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he's controlling and jealous as a boyfriend imagine him as a husband. Talk to him about it. Tell him how unfair he is being to you. Tell him to him you the benefit of doubts. Tell him to put himself in your shoes and see how annoying it could be. Of course he can't change over night. Give him some time to work on this and within a couple months if he continue with this attitude than you gotta say good bye to him. You are an adult already you don't need someone to control you. You have parents already and don't need another one.
2006-11-07 02:05:08 · answer #2 · answered by uniqaznmeg 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It wont get any better. Guys who are controlling and gets jealous easily just want you for them its not that they suspect you all the time but its just that they want to own you all the time.
One good thing is that he would love you all the time and would be really excitedly planing your future together.
On the other hand, It's a hard relationship that you need to tolerate a lot.
Your choice to take it leave it. Hard to change them. Be in it if you are ready.
2006-11-07 02:02:44 · answer #3 · answered by Anne H 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you really love him then talk to him. Tell him how you feel and how you cant stand the way he acts at times. People do change, sometimes they just need a push... If in the end he can't change then he isn't the one for you and you will find someone better for you. I wish you the best of luck!
2006-11-07 01:59:47 · answer #4 · answered by pinklipstiiick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't change. I've had plenty of boyfriends like this and you can't waste your time trying to prove that you're not going to cheat or do something wrong. Continue on like you normally do and if he can't handle you, then he's gonna have to move on!!! Tell him he needs to accept the way you are or find someone else.
2006-11-07 01:57:24 · answer #5 · answered by ashstrom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you should do is leave him. As fast as possible. He is controlling and manipulative and probably a potential abuser into the bargain. Already he has you believing that it is somehow your job to "prove" to him that you're trustworthy. No, honey, it's not your job at all to cure him of his unrealistic expectations. Next he'll probably try to separate you from family and friends, and when he has you completely isolated, the abuse will start in earnest. I am serious, run don't walk away from this one.
2006-11-07 01:56:36 · answer #6 · answered by Liz 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
TALK! relationships r based on talking just tell him its uncomfortable for you that kind of behavior or in the other hand learn to deal with it, remember that you trully love someone when you accept them with all their flaws and still you wont do anything to change them
2006-11-07 01:57:22 · answer #7 · answered by lysa24 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't. If he is super controlling he wants to dominate you, or he is a cheater. Best to get out now. Love is not jealous or controlling.
2006-11-07 01:57:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him straight out that you would never cheat on him and if he can't accept that than maybe the two of you don't need to be toghether
2006-11-07 01:55:41 · answer #9 · answered by Greg M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It will never happen. Most men that our controlling in the begining only get worse. Sorry, been thare done that!
2006-11-07 01:55:55 · answer #10 · answered by Nani 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋