If a girl had been molested would that stop you from asking her out, even if she had a great look and personality(like the girl from ur dreams)??? If so why?? If not why??
2006-11-06 12:26:59 · 19 answers · asked by Hott Gymnast 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
What if she was scarred for life?? Would you mind if she wasn't ready 4 sex right away, or would you push her out of her comfort zone??
2006-11-06 12:31:03 · update #1
She would trust you as long as you didn't do anything to break it. Trust me(i am the girl!) It is hard at times to be touched certain ways but I have learned to trust guys again.
2006-11-06 12:32:56 · update #2
I am a vegetarian and 5'1 90lb gymnast. I don't look anorexic cuz im not. I eat all the time but cuz I train it burns off. I am in high school.
Would you ever allow her to tell you what happened when the anniversary of the date came?? Cuz that is the hardest day.
2006-11-06 12:35:13 · update #3
No, it wouldn't stop me.
Why? Because I'm a gentleman. That means I care about her, not her body. It sounds like you need a guy who will be your friend.
A boyfriend who is really a friend will be willing to wait. If you are having a hard day (like the anniversary date) he will be understanding and caring.
If he is just a selfish jerk, he will get impatient for you to "get over it" so he can have sex. Don't fall for a guy who thinks of himself first.
2006-11-06 12:28:50 · answer #1 · answered by crgrier 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow.
This brings me back to my second girlfriend I had a relationship for 6 years.
I was devoted to helping her and being with her. She was great to be around with. Loved movies like I did, but the one thing she had a problem with was sex. She enjoyed it, but afterward she'd go to the other side of the bed and didn't like to be touched. She would get into mood swings and at times, shut people off (including me) when we gathered in social functions. This frustrated me and wanted to break away, but I didn't want to abandon her and leave her on the dust.
That was a mistake on my part.
I would've told her EARLY in the relationship that this wasn't going to work for me and need to be with someone who I can have a relationship with. Not just only the sex, but everything else. What wound up happening is that we got into arguments and fights. All because we weren't honest about our frustrations and what it was doing to us.
No man or woman should be together UNLESS it's a problem that they tackle right away. What happened to her was a crime and she didn't learn to deal with it till much later in her life and the effects of what happened when she was a child still effects her to a degree.
I wouldn't blame any person if they didn't want to be with a lover that frustrates them. It's not fair to them on both sides.
Going out with a person like that carries a heavy burden on the other partner and frustrates them that they can't do but so much.
Lesson learned.
2006-11-06 12:41:22 · answer #2 · answered by monkeymustard 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I wouldn't know about it until she told me right. And she probably wouldn't tell me until after we and already been on dates and were comfortable enough to have that kind of conversation.
At that point I would ask her if she had been to counseling, if she hasn't I would convince her to seek professional counseling, someone who can ask all the right questions and give the most helpful answers.
Wow, I always wanted to meet the girl of my dreams.
2006-11-06 12:37:20 · answer #3 · answered by hankthecowdog 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would take her out as long as it was not a big hang up on her part. My wife was molested as a child and it has only caused problems a couple of times.
2006-11-06 12:31:17 · answer #4 · answered by Richard W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, that would never affect why I would go out with someone. People can't help if they've been molested or not, so why hold that against someone? They are probably better people because of it, you have to be strong to overcome something like that.
2006-11-06 12:28:49 · answer #5 · answered by dumpsterdd90 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I might ask her out, but she would need to have a lot of counselling to help her deal with the molestation before she could have a normal and meaningful love relationship.
2006-11-06 12:30:55 · answer #6 · answered by Jeff W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the girl is will to go out with you, because she has been traumatized, be careful what you do and say. No matter how seductive you perceive her to be, she is hurting inside. She will like you more if you are a gentleman and treat her with the respect that she deserves.
2006-11-06 12:29:15 · answer #7 · answered by kellenraid 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
90lbs is too fat for someone 5'1" and a gymnast. If you shed 5 pounds you'd probably be a better more agile gymnast.
2006-11-08 02:06:19 · answer #8 · answered by Lesleann 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HELL NO. ****, almost all girls these days have. I was viciously attacked in my youth, I ain't got no baggage from it, but I'm a damn hot chica (A model)
Anyways, you should support her through her trying times!!! It's important you know. Sometimes chicks just like to be dramatic and bring it up to do so, and sometimes they sincerely need to get over it. Help her get over it! Be a man!
2006-11-06 12:31:06 · answer #9 · answered by Jenny A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even though I am a girl, I would still ask her out. Maybe you can give her the security she wants and make her feel happy. Go for it!!!
Best of Luck! :)
2006-11-06 12:29:38 · answer #10 · answered by Melanie Smith 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋