Do you think this mean and rude?

Question

When I am at work, I don't talk about my love life like everyone else. A coworker is telling people work with that I am a virgin, even though I never said I was and she never even asked. Do you think that she was being mean? I really think that she has no business talking about my life like she knows me. Should I be mad? Not that being a virgin is bad or anything, but I just think she was being mean and nosy, and was trying to get me to talk about something I don't want to talk about.

Answer 1

Yes she is mean and childish. I don't think talking a bout ones sex life at work is appropriate. I once had to work with a women 20 years my senior, she had recently remarried, after a long divorce, any way she drove everyone crazy, by relating all the not to o juicy, and gross details of her sex life. One day, I couldn't take it anymore, and very loudly announced, "I don't want to hear any thing, I can read better in a bad romance novel".Everyone laughed, end of sex stories, but I must admit she rarely spoke to me after that.{Thank God]

Answer 2

No, you don't have to be mad. Telling people that you are a virgin is indeed inappropriate. The best idea is probably to leave it alone, let it die out. It may sound ridiculous, but in some aspect (physical or psychological) she could feel at least mildly threatened or jealous of you. Just leave the comment as unprofessional and keep the higher ground. If she really starts to press it, look into confronting it privately as harassment. Most workplaces have strict policies on that.

Answer 3

There you go. Basically you have answered your own question, sweetie. She knows you dont talk. And she is just one nosey parker who wants to know. And since she touched on a subject that is sure to invite great debate, she might be hoping this somehow and someday will hit your raw nerve and you will start talking.

As an aside, I like the idea that you dont talk about your love life at work. I do the same thing; I just dont see the point having my life story being scrutinized and taken apart for observation and the object of gossip at my workplace.

Answer 4

First of all, if you don't wish to share the details of your love life with your co-workers, that's your business. Secondly, your co-worker sounds like a case of arrested development. That is so childish and immature! It's none of her damned business if you're a virgin or not. I would try to ignore her if at all possible. And if you are a virgin, be proud of the fact and hold your head up high.

Answer 5

ASK HER, PRIVATELY, IF SHE IS TELLING PEOPLE AT WORK THAT YOU ARE A VIRGIN! ASK HER WHAT THAT CONCLUSION, [IF IT IS TRUE THAT SHE IS TALKING ABOUT YOU TO OTHERS], IS BASED UPON.
MAYBE, SHE IS THE TYPE OF PERSON THAT JUST TALKS ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE....[BE ON YOUR TOES]!!!!!
I DO NOT THINK IT IS MEAN OR RUDE....BUT, I DO THINK THAT SHE HAS TO KNOW YOUR THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS ABOUT THIS!!! MAYBE, SHE IS JUST CLUELESS. ASK HER IF SHE WAS JUST BEING MEAN, NOSY, OR WHAT. [AGAIN, IF, SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOU].
I AGREE, SHE HAS NO BUSINESS TALKING ABOUT YOUR LIFE!!!
SHOULD YOU BE MAD? THAT IS FOR YOU TO DECIDE...ARE YOU?
ALSO, TELL HER WHAT YOU FEEL WHEN THIS HAPPENS! IF SHE ASKS YOU THOSE QUESTIONS THAT YOU ARE NOT 'COMFORTABLE' WITH...YOU CAN ALWAYS RESPOND WITH SOMETHING LIKE...'THAT IS PERSONAL'...' I AM NOT COMFORTABLE ANSWERING THAT!'....'WHY DO YOU ASK'?.....ETC. GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 6

Maybe this co worker is jealous, maybe she lost her virginity is a way she didn't enjoy or regrets. It may be mean and rude but instead of looking at her like shes annoying and rude i'd personally just feel sorry for her since she had nothing better to talk about then your virginity.

Answer 7

I think the social dynamic at work is very often similar to that of high school. Often times the best thing to do is laugh and walk away. Getting angry never solves anything - it makes you look guilty or overly sensitive and certainly unprofessional.

If I was you I would simply ignore her comments. Show that you have the class, maturity and professionalism that your coworker lacks. After all, very few of us go to work to make friends. We are there to do a job and then get back to our life - and your private life is no one else's business.

Peace!

Answer 8

Hon, NOTHING that woman does or "means" should matter to you. She's trash and has already proven it. Just ignore her and her talk.

If people talking about your sex life (or lack thereof) bothers you, then its sexual harrassment and she has NO RIGHT TO DO IT. Simply talk to your boss, she should be called into the office and told to shut up and leave you alone. However, that will probably ostricize you more. If it doesn't really both you, then pretend you are a virgin, that way you can pretend you don't have a sex life to talk about!

Good luck!

Answer 9

I think your coworker went too much. She's spreading something that is really personal. I would be mad if I were you. Maybe she just wants the attention and gossiping about other people is her daily routine. I hate those kind of people messing with other people's personal business. It's just so annoying.

Answer 10

i think ur co-worker is trying to tease u and get u to talk about ut personal life like everyone else. You could say to her just because i dont talk about my personal life here doesnt mean im a virgin or dont have a personal life!