We've been together for 8 months, and have been nearly inseparable since the start... My intuition has been telling me lately that he's been untruthful and possibly cheating.. Last Friday night he said he had got called to work to work O/T, and it just didn't sit right in my stomach all night long, something didn't feel right.. The next evening I found some sort of slip for a lodge and I just googled the lodge, to find it was a hotel (stamp-dated for the night he said he had to work O/T). I know if I ask him about it he won;t admit it.. I truly love him (and he says he loves me) but I have been through an unfaithful man before and have stayed single 5 years before this one to avoid it... Is it best for me to just walk away now before he does it again or do I give him a second chance, knowing he may do it again? I don't want to walk away but as they say "fool me once, shame on you.. fool me twice, shame on me".. It's a catch 22 and I'm unsure of how to handle this one.
2006-11-06 05:38:02 · 40 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you don't trust him, don't be with him. It doesn't matter why you don't trust him. Either you do or you don't. It may start with a little issue over a receipt and a lie, but do you want this lifestyle for your future? Don't be with men you don't trust. Period.
2006-11-06 05:42:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, I have mixed feelings about people that cheat. On one hand, I look at my ex husband, who we had sex at least 4 times a week and we have been divorced 8 years now and he still says I was the best he ever had, but yet he cheated on me multiple times. In this case, yes, once a cheater, always a cheater because he has continued to cheat on his g/f's over the years. On the other hand, try to think and see if you can rationalize why he might be cheating. Is he becoming distant with you? Are ya'll fighting more and having sex less? Are you not giving him everything he hints around to wanting in the bed? If you want to keep him, you have to determine if he is a born cheater. Ask his ex's about him. Did he cheat on them too? If so, he is just a cheater and you need to go ahead and break it off, cry and be sad, treat yourself nice, then find someone else. Good luck.
2006-11-06 05:48:01 · answer #2 · answered by Corona 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You would only be trying to fool yourself in this situation. Besides it has only been 8 months. Obviously you are not the girl for him if he is running around. Most likely he will break up with you anyways, right now he has just not decided how to. He probably doesnt want to hurt your feelings. Believe me, there are plenty of fish in the sea. Some are dirty cheaters and some are really good guys with honestly that are very hard working.
2006-11-06 05:41:17 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should leave him. If someone cheat on you than it means they didn't love you otherwise they wouldn't cheat in the first place.Trust me, guys who love a girl a lot will not think or do anything like cheating. There is no love in cheating. If you looking for a committed relationship don't bother to give a chance to your bf. Find someone who is committed as you and if they love you they will do anything for you and not cheat. I say you should tell him that he got caught up and that your leaving him for a better man obviously he didn't care about your feeling so that why he cheated in the first place.
2006-11-06 05:47:40 · answer #4 · answered by Un4getableAsianGirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WALK AWAY! always walk away from a cheater. Once a cheater...always a cheater. They dont change their ways, and they dont plan on it. I wouldnt even date a guy who has EVER cheated because they simply DO NOT Change. You will always wonder, what is he doing, where is he, who is he with. Just think about it... think about the VERY first time you cant get ahold of him, You dont know where he is... Your gonna always think that hes still cheating and it will ruin your future. Move on to find someone who will treat you right. Good luck
2006-11-06 05:47:02 · answer #5 · answered by Angel Eve 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow this is a difficult one,i feel this one indiscretion,and we have no concrete proof it was an indiscretion,should be noted,but not acted on,you will no over the coming weeks if things have changed,if he does o/t again you must be sure he's up to no good,i dont pretend to no how,sort of hiring a private detective this is hard,maybe find an excuse to phone him.it seems a real shame to give up if you really love him and you had no one for five years.you never no the little indiscretion may have been a big disaster.good luck.
2006-11-06 06:01:45 · answer #6 · answered by Cool Dude 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is a man's world.how many men would walk away from because they cheated on you,you only use your head please.i tell you there is no woman that can claim to be very happy in a relationship except those that ignore the infidelity of their men.if you keep thinking in that direction,you would hurt yourself.matters of men are carried not on the head,but on the shoulder.they are all the same irrespective of the colour.all we need do is support them with prayer that they should not go astray or meet with evil women that would want to 'confiscate' them.
2006-11-06 06:19:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Confront him first just to see how he riggles out of it,,but please if he has been unfaithful,walk because if u let him get away with it once he will try again,,believe,my ex thinks he's a stud muffin but the thing that he cheated with was grose,,,oooooow!!!!!!
I forgave him then he walked all over me..please please don't make ur self unhappy and it is so easy to become a bunny boiler,you won't be able to help it because ur always be trying to find clues..Good luck,,try to keep smiling
2006-11-06 06:02:20 · answer #8 · answered by kimble 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask him as if you know nothing about the hotel, like what happened at work, and if he doesnt tell the truth, add new bits like, do you know this hotel, if he doesnt tell the truth dont bother, dump him, youll get over it, if he comes out with the truth, where he was, what he did, if it was being unfaithful dump him, if buisiness dont dump. you never know it may be just something to do with work, like a meeting at the hotel. my last bf cheated, lucky we were only going out for 3 weeks. i did the bumping, men are toads (most of them anyway)
2006-11-06 06:17:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely walk away! There is no need to try to stay and work it out, it's not worth it. Once a cheater, always a cheater! Good Luck!
2006-11-06 05:44:37 · answer #10 · answered by Manna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋