ive been going out with my boyfriend for 3 years, 1st relationship over one month, have been living together for 1.5 yrs, feel im asking myself the question, is this it a lot lately, i love him but i dont know if im in love with him, we spend all our time together and maybe thats half the problem. sometimes i wish iwas single, and feel maybe im missing out on something, but then again i dont know what id do without him, im afraid that il do something il always regret, either way. can anyone help?!
2006-11-06 02:12:58 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thats a dilemma you've got there. You're right not to make any rash decision. If you're bored or your minds starting to wonder then you need to find other interests outside of your relationship. try that - get a new hobby, interests, something that gets you apart. If after that you find yourself attracted to other people then chances are you're not committed.
Its normal after a while for a relationship to move from the romantic to the companionate form of love. try not to give up the ghost just yet - you may have something very special where you are.
But as I say - if your new interests take you to new people and you feel you want to grow through a new relationship then its time to call it a day.
Good luck
2006-11-06 03:32:33 · answer #1 · answered by charlie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look girl, you need to stop being afraid of the future with your man. Being afraid of what he may do or what you may do, will make you do stupid things. You need to be happy you have a good man who loves being with you 24/7 and supports you in everything. Right now, you are thinking.... we have been together so long, is there something else better? If there was something out there better, you wouldnt have moved in with your man and told him you loved him.
Imagine what you could do to him, by acting this way or having these thoughts. You are in love with him, but of course, you're still not used to being in the same home with him and being around him 24/7. Sometimes you need space, and you should tell him that. Obviously, you arent being honest with him.
If you make the mistake and do something that will hurt him, you will never see him again and realize this and feel bad as hell. You wont even want anyone else. You will realize how good of a man he was to you and how much he loved you. And you will be giving this up because you wanna go explore other people. Again, that is selfish of you thinking about yourself. You definitely dont deserve this good man, if you feel this way. You should tell him how you are feeling. Thats when you will know how you and him are feeling. If this feeling is mutual, then you can decide, well we dont need to be together.
2006-11-06 02:24:12 · answer #2 · answered by yagurlbubblez 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
start spending one or two nights a week away from him...you need outside attention and input from other people...take a class or start a hobby that occupies a few hours of your life outside your home. If you still feel that you may do something you regret- communicate to him that he is not fulfilling every part of you and that you need to find your path before you can make the decision to take the next step in your relationship. If the two of you are mature enough, you can take a break and have no bitter feelings. Be honest and be consistent. Don't be wishy washy and don't use him as a back up plan.
2006-11-06 02:18:19 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you have grown apart from your partner...it's not hard to do either...but remember being single is not all that either...
I have been single for 5 years following a 11yr relationship...
I am happier being single.....
Maybe you need to find a new interest outside of your home and your relationship.. not another man, but perhaps a volunteer job so you can be doing something other than spending your time with only HIM>
good luck to ya....be well..
2006-11-06 02:16:43 · answer #4 · answered by Babsygirl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you need some space. Why don't you just have time apart - see your friends more often without him and vice versa. Also, try talking to him and tell him that you feel like things are stuck in a rut. He might be feeling the same and that way it's either something you can work on together, or it'll be easier to break up.
2006-11-06 02:15:22 · answer #5 · answered by Wafflebox 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you love him; you are not in love with him. you can live without him, and thats just what you are going to do~!
1.5 years of living together- that will make it harder to move on because you are so adjusted to having someone there at home with you for that amount of time. it will be kind of hard to readjust yourself to a new set of routine, one that will make you stronger as an individual.
girl, its over and you should let it go. all those things that are holding you back are your "what ifs" and your reminiscences of the past that makes you say "it could be."
2006-11-06 02:16:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anna D 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know that saying "the grass is always greener on the other side" Well, it looks that way until you get there and it's a hay field. I just think that you are wondering "what if" and not looking at and appreciating what you have...
2006-11-06 02:17:15 · answer #7 · answered by sundragonjess 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
u just needed space that's all try to go somewhere without him and no communication to him...maybe then u can find the answer to ur problem...if u think ur happy on ur own than u have been happy with him ..then end it in a nice way...listen closely to your heart
2006-11-06 02:18:02 · answer #8 · answered by LaDy in Luv 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
the only person who can help you..is you.
either sit him down and discuss how you are feeling & if he cant be bothered to listen then dump him, as if he was nadly in love with you, then he should care about the way you are feeling.
2006-11-06 02:16:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
When you start doubting the relationship.......it's in trouble. Time to start over.
2006-11-06 02:16:51 · answer #10 · answered by FireBug 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋