I met my boyfriend online and we have been inseperable for the past 7 months. We have never met but we chat via webcam and mic daily. I live in Russia; he in the States. Plans have been arranged to meet. We are both virgins with conservative views and waiting until marriage. I am 21; he is 25. Recently,our normal everyday intellectual chats have turned into more amorous in nature and not due to me. I have been very uncomfortable since he has persisted on. 2 days ago he sent me suggestive photos of himself and has been continuing to send more. He does it to please me he says. Sadly, this has me very uneasy and I feel no attraction when viewing his photos. It is repulsive to me and I do not wish to be with him in this manner. I was pondering this all may be a result of never being with a man. Understand, I cannot express this to him for fear it may destroy his newly attained self confidence. Has anyone had a similar problem and is there is a way to overcome this impending doom? Thank you
2006-11-05 18:24:51 · 14 answers · asked by Olya 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Don't worry about his self confidence. Worry about yourself.
He is a friend you met on line. He is not a boy friend in the sense that you want a physical relationship with him. Guys are more visually stimulated them women. He may think he is doing you a favor with the photos, but he isn't. This could be one of many misconceptions. What does he want to do when he meets? Does he want sex? What are you willing to give him. Be up front about it. Let him know how you feel or it will just get worse.
2006-11-05 18:58:52 · answer #1 · answered by Mr Cellophane 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't suggest that you have this kind of intimate relationship via webcam, because I don't think you can be intimate in any way other than in person. You need to express to him that you are content in working at a close friendship at this time, and maybe in the future when you can be together in person you will be open to exploring the possibility of a romantic relationship. You need to be honest with him, and let him know that you are not ready to take things to that level at this time. You may never be attracted to him, but if he shows you respect and understand now, your relationship may very well develop into something beautiful later on.
2006-11-06 02:34:15 · answer #2 · answered by Cynthia 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you are not ready for that & to please stop sending the pictures.
But if you still feel that you are not attracted to him, even if he did stop with the pictures. You really should end it. Do it before you guys take the time, energy, and money to meet each other. It will be so much easier to end it if you guys have not met face to face, and if you haven't invested all of the money into meeting.
If you do meet make sure he doesn't pressure you into anything that you do not want. Make sure you still stand by your belief in waiting until marriage.
2006-11-06 02:34:08 · answer #3 · answered by ;-) 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If he truly respects you he wouldn't do that. Since you haven't met him, discontinue this cyber-ship with him. Trust me his confidence won't be crushed. Your not wrong to feel disgusted I would too if a man I thought was like me started sending me perv shots of himself. I wouldn't deal with that. Forget him, your too good for that. PLUS he's 25 and a virgin!? I am not saying he isn't a virgin all I'm saying is that you shouldn't be naive into believing that so fast. Take care.
2006-11-06 02:41:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sexual attraction wont last very long. There are many more men out there who could be as sexually attractive as he is to you.
If youre not satisfied with his looks...looks dont last very long as well. Dont agonize too much over it. As long as a man makes you feel happy and healthy,he deserves a chance ;)
2006-11-06 02:52:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to stop sending you the photos. Ignoring the photos and forgetting them completely, how do you feel about him. It you aren't attracted to him, then dump him.
2006-11-06 02:29:44 · answer #6 · answered by Christina 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
For one thing, if you think you fell in love with him, it was for his personality and not for what he looks like. Just let him know he is being too aggressive.
2006-11-06 02:31:00 · answer #7 · answered by blondie 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Oh please! If he's doing something you don't like,then you have to tell him so.At some point you have to stand up for yourself.Just tell him you don't like to see him nude,stop sending me the naked pictures and if you don't it's over between us.
2006-11-06 02:32:24 · answer #8 · answered by master_der_man 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He's not doing it for you. He's doing it for him. He's an exhibitionist. Probably he's lying about his virginity as well just to trick you into his bed. Don't take your chances with this man as you might be sorry after wards.
2006-11-06 02:27:51 · answer #9 · answered by Z 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
try tlling him that you both live to far to ever be together and find a boy near you that simple in my opion?
2006-11-06 02:31:53 · answer #10 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋