Trying to get back to God...and reconcile faith with logical beliefs.?

Question

I was raised Catholic but left the church at 15 after moving to a new, larger town where I didn't feel comfortable and welcomed in a congregation where I didn't know anyone. I was also beginning to have new ideas about things like abortion (pro-choice) and homosexuality (whatever floats your boat), and felt it was dishonest to belong to the Church when I felt this way.

I still feel the same way about abortion and homosexuality but feel a desire to belong to the Church again. Who else out there has dealt with the same issues? How did you reconcile your faith with what seems right and fair to you?

Also, I've been going back to church a bit but don't feel right taking communion. I enjoy the ritual and the comfort of the mass, but don't quite feel as comfortable as I would like. Has anyone read any books that might help me in this journey? Or just any suggestions?

I think perhaps many people are confused as to what I am asking. I don't need to hear the arguments against the religion. For the last several years I have lived without it entirely. It was the emptiness I felt that has brought me back. I am looking ONLY for constructive advice of people who may have gone through a similar experience. Thank you.

Answer 1

I've dealt with similar issues. I was raised Protestant and left the church for a while. I missed the fellowship, a lot. There's so much to be said for the comfort you can find within a good church. The problem was that I could never reconcile my beliefs about evolution, my scientific paradigm about the origins of the universe, homosexuality, and feminism with the Bible's opposing views. To me, I couldn't just choose to re-interpret the Bible for my convenience. It means what it says, not what I want it to mean. I was unable to return to the church because I was unable to believe in the god described by the Bible.

After that, I looked at religion itself pretty seriously and from an academic standpoint, rather than a religious one. I found a few textbooks describing religion as objectively and sensitively as possible with humans doing the work and managed to get into a college course regarding religion.

I suppose when it comes to deities, I'm best described as "spiritual". I believe it's possible that there is a god of some sort out there, but I don't believe that anything written by man can describe it, let alone explain what any god wants. Religions are man-made. Still, I needed religion. I found Zen Buddhism to be to my preference. It suits me. I don't believe in re-incarnation or immutable souls. I think we're always changing, always learning. It's the nature of living. It took a long time, years, for me to get where I am because I had a lot of residual fear of going to hell. Sunday School is effective indoctrination. In the end, that was the final nail in my Christian coffin. I could not respect a religion that promised love and held on with fear.

I think it's different for you in ways, but it's also the same. The Church's ideas don't fit yours, but you're still drawn to the comfort of fellowship. Perhaps even the comfort of god. I don't know any books that would necessarily help you, because I don't think that's your issue. Do you miss the sense of belonging or do you miss god? If you miss god, then your problem lies in understanding that any beliefs that you have that are against what the church says are sin. If you miss the fellowship, but not god, then perhaps you can find another way with values you agree with to fellowship. There are Protestant churches that agree with you on abortion and homosexuality. If religion isn't to your taste, you can also find fellowship by finding groups that meet for secular reasons. I belonged to a reading club for a while. We'd gather in the library every Wednesday night and discuss the book we'd read that week. It felt wonderful. Then I moved.

I'd suggest you talk to a priest, but it's their duty to return you to the fold so you won't get the help you actually need. I wouldn't suggest you talk to anyone else's minister/rabbi/whathaveyou for the same reason. It's usually their duty to convert you. You can speak to someone, such as a therapist, a mentor, a teacher, an advisor about it as well.

My crisis of faith was the hardest thing I've gone through, even harder than boot camp and childbirth. I'm feeling a lot more rewarded and confident about my choices once I'd gotten through it. I hope that you'll find peace with your choices as well.

Answer 2

I will keep this short.

There is nothing sinful in having a different between what the Church (Roman Catholic) teaches. Being pro Choice and supportive of homosexuality (to name a few) is not a sin. Having an abortion or carrying on a homosexual relationship is.

Since I don't know you or have heard your confession, I must be general in my response.

Church is a house of God where sinners go to pray. Our perfect pray is the mass. We do it because Jesus asked us to.

Confession is another sacrament. We confess our sin to God in the present of God's priest. This is your entry way back into the faith. Usually a general confusion where you that ask forgiveness of all sin from the time you left to the time of the confusion. At this point, you can fully partake in the mass.

There is more, but I wanted to keep it short.

Answer 3

Hi, if you are uncomfortable with the ritualism and traditionalism of your church, then try a new church. instead of going for the Catholic church, try a Christian church, they are more relaxed, you will feel much more welcomed.

as far as abortion and homosexuality goes, i dont have the same opinion as you, and i will not get into it. if u wanna know why i dont believe in abortion, check this out (copy and paste): http://abortionismurder.org/HTML/I-A-4-photos22.html

if you want to be free to make your own choices in worldly beliefs without the church on your back, but still want to be a follower of Christ, i suggest going by what the bible says. when you believe in God and ask Him to come into your heart, you are saved, but then you need to renew your mind, learn the truth about not only spiritual things, but the worldly life issues also. When God says NO to something, He always has a perfect good reason for it, and He tells you that reason in the word of God.

get your "beliefs system" from the WORD of GOD. the Bible, not a denomination or church. then, when you see what the bible has to say about stuff, join a church that lines up with the word of God.

as far as not feeling like you can go to church or pursue your relationship with God just coz u have a few opinions that dont line up with what you have been taught.... that is just the devil telling you that you arent worthy and that youd be a hypocryte to stay. its just the devil rubbing his hands together smiling coz he wants you out of God's will for your life. there is nothing more dangerous to the devil than a Christian on fire for God who is walking in God's will. The Lord loves you no matter what... and He wants you to seek Him at all times... not run from Him.

God hasnt forgotten you, He's just waiting for you to pursue Him with all your heart, find a church that will help you do that.

i did, and its been awesome. i also go to bible college. that was the best thing i ever did in my life, for my walk with God AND for life in general. it really grows you and teaches you about so many different things. Church related, and world related.

God bless you in your journey!

Answer 4

Girl, I've so been there. 13 yrs of catholic school. Reason enough to leave the church. I'd felt a need to get back involved with church because of my children. I don't want to preach, convert or tell you what to do. But I've found Unitarian Universalism to be an open, welcoming spiritual road, allowing -- indeed, encouraging -- "the free and responsible search for truth and meaning". There's no way to do it justice here. Check out this link if you're so inclined: www.uua.org.

Good Luck! :)

Answer 5

Not having organization ideals myself, now not certain how so much support I can also be. But, possibly that's the reply. Our brains are fairly alternatively confined. For evidence, I sight the infrequent character, like da Vinci, Einsteinn, or Hawking, who sees the sector in an fully extraordinary method & enlightens us to what has consistently been there. Even Newton. Just a couple of examples, you'll be able to discover extra in the event you seem. Their intuitiveness and targeted outlook indicates us only a small fraction of what mankind could also be in a position of someday, one day. I recommend you attempt to get extra in contact along with your little one self. The person who did not have a difficulty with now not having all of the solutions however used to be inclined to move on intestine emotions. If you'll be able to get in that mind-set & consider in your difficulty for a even as, possibly you'll be able to see your formative years ideals are however a small piece of a greater puzzle. I am ok with my ideas at the universe being fluid. I discover such a lot faith to be like Aesop's Fables or fairy stories, cautionary stories with a few well courses. It is in which those religions overlap that I consider the reality lies. Most cultures have a first-class flood tale. Why all people has one, whatever like that occurred that burnt up such a lot tribes. Somewhere in technology is side of the reply as good. The extra we study in that discipline, I consider the extra we must become aware of that we're simply babes within the universe. We are consistently one million leap forward suggestion & mathematical evidence clear of throwing out matters we have now authorized as truth a while. Why are not able to your spirituality be extra like that? These are the matters I presently recognise to be actual, that is the hole in which I am now not certain how they have compatibility in combination, and sooner or later lies the lacking hyperlink that ties them in combination. Well, only a inspiration besides.

Answer 6

I would recommend looking into how the church reached their decision on the topics you don't feel comfortable about. (Look them up in the Catholic Catechism to start, perhaps or check out a few catholic websites… maybe EWTN.com or somewhere), While I wouldn’t expect it to change your mind, it will at least help you make you a truely informed decision to agree with the chruch or agree to disagree, and that might bring you some peace of mind.

Answer 7

Isn't it annoying when that bugger common sense kicks in and tells you to use your own judgement and it tried to trump the values others are forcing on you because they don't make sense or agree with you? The church doesn't like it and it is hard to blindly believe things when rationalizing openly is a far better option and you have started to figure that out. Trusting your own judgement is much better than accepting the judgement of those who are long dead and outdated in a blind and unseeing way as the faithful do.

For someone like you, faith, the disgusting plague of humanity, is not going to be possible for very long and you need to search out your own path instead of continuing to blindly accept the outdated and self-righteous "morals" of long-dead Jewish guys who had paper and vivid imaginations.

Answer 8

Here's the answer to your problem.
Give up on the idea that there is a god.
Once you can accept that reality, the whole religious system falls apart at the seams.
Then live your life withion the constraints of what is acceptable to society as a whole and to your own moral standards. It is really easy to do if you have confiidence in yourself and are able to stand up and be counted.
Leave behind all those childish ideas and be an adult.

Answer 9

Prayer is the key and faith unlocks the door God wants to restored to you the joy that u once had he is willing and redy to accept you in his arms just believ in him first start by confessing your faults and sins to him let him know how u feel he will for give u just trust in him acknowlege him for who he is and he will direct your path he come that you might have life and life more abondly he wants u to be happy

Answer 10

I really feel that the "whatever is right for you" attitude is wrong. If we truly have that attitude, how can we say that rape or murder or anything "bad" is wrong?

As for your church, I'd just ask you this: Are you being drawn closer to God, or a church?