What is the most effective way to discipline the terrible two's?

Question

I try positive reinforcement and praise but hope I'm dealing with just a phase.

Answer 1

yes they all go through phases. i have raised 4 kids, thay are all different in their personalities, and so are my 5 grandchildren. each child responds differently to a parents' reaction to negative behavior, or behavior you want to discourage. time outs are popular, and work well for many. personally i never used them. i just tried to distract them from the thing i didn't want them doing, and praised them when they did something right. for toddlers, if they have too much negative stuff, they will act that way, like parrots. raising toddlers is an all-consuming-daily/nightly effort of love we mothers know too well. thats what wears us out. the battle of the wills. the phases do pass, but at this age do your best to distract, get the childs' interest in another positive activity. let him know how you feel, but gently, no-no, that will give you an oweee, or you might fall down and go boom!, toddlers are in the phase of development when they realize they are separate from mommy, and they want to be autonomous, but they need lots of tlc and learning before they are going to complete that stage of development. it sounds like your on the right path mom! the twos aren't so much terrible as they are tiring for us moms and dads! but this stage will pass, and new ones will come. enjoy it while you can they grow up fast.

Answer 2

All of my friends say - and I agree - it's not actually the terrible twos - there are a series of phases they go through and sometime around age three or when they start getting together with other toddlers in different settings - there are brand new challenges to deal with in what they learn from their little friends and the negative behaviors they teach their toddler friends. I don't recommend the basic timeouts, spakings or negative reinforcement. I recommend 1,2,3 Magic by Dr. Phelan - it's not just a bunch of hype - it really helps a TON - I was just about ready to tear my hair out until I tried it. You won't become a perfect parent and you need to be consistent but if you use this simple method - it will make a world of difference. If you're going nusto trying to figure out what to do - this is totally worth a shot. You're child will still not be perfect and new challenges will come up, but this is so awesome - you have to get the first video in the series - it's amazing - you can probably check it out from your local library. Dr. Phelan says children are not little adults - they are wild animals - we are the wild animal trainers! They do not respond to basic reason about why to behave a certain way and they do not come with a manual.

Answer 3

I think what you're doing is the most effective way. Just make sure your reinforcer is actually a reinforcer. Does that reward increase behavior in the future? If so, that reward is a reinforcer. It's also important to be consistent. Deliver the reinforcer each time the desired behavior occurs.

Maybe you should use a token economy. The token can be a star on a chart, and those stars can be traded in for something more desirable than the stars themselves. Make sure the things the token is exchanged for is not available to your child else where (for example, your mom gives him 5 bucks at each visit) Deliver a token each time the desired behavior occurs. Start by giving one token for each response, then slowly increase the required occurences of response to receive a token. Once you get a steady rate of desired behavior you can slowly fade it out. Eventually you won't need to use it for the desired behavior to occur.

Also make sure you're not reinforcing your child's unwanted behavior by giving him attention.

Answer 4

stick with what you say, no means no all the way ( don't say "okay just this once") it doesn't work that way, kids are always testing your limits no matter how old they are (along with crying habits to see how far your willing or not willing, ex: getting up in the middle of the night crying for mommy even though they already past that age of waking up.
praise when good like what your doing
get a time out stool (2 years old = 2 mins) pay attention ask why they were put there. and tell them that was very bad and next time so and so and so.
I have a 3 yr old toddler terrible two is just a beginning.
remember though this is all accordingly to situation.

Answer 5

I also have a terrible 18 months old.Well-he is terrible some of the time.Anways I use a very firm voice and tell him no don't do ... whatever it is he is doing.It sometimes takes 2 or 3 times but he will almost always obey.He understands no.Just be firm and consistent.

Answer 6

I found that not giving any choices worked well so I didn't have to discipline very often. For instance....

I never asked do you want to go to bed, I just picked her up and said time for bed.

I never asked are you ready for a bath, I just picked her up and put her in the tub.

I put the clothes I wanted her to wear on her not allowing her to pick what she wanted to wear.

Less choices made life so much easier.

When she got a bit older I gave her more choices but not at two.

Answer 7

Not to discourage you but my son is going on 4 and still in the throes of the terrible 2s. be consistent and never give in because the day you do - you will loose what little control you do have. My son is constantly pushing the boundries and trying his luck and there are days I want to send him back from where he came - but to be honest he is more busy than naughty but like I said - be consistant.

Answer 8

Yea,I know what you mean,But time out's work sometimes,and Taking away a favorite toy and making them work to get it back helps too...

Answer 9

Lots of time out for the child

Answer 10

Try completely ignoring bad behavior.

Never react to a tantrum, let it be until the child calms down, and then show it that you love him/her.