Hey people.*tear* could youplease give as many answers as possible??

Question

why would you ever molest a girl??Do you not realize it scars her for life. Can you all tell me why they do this to us??
every time my bf touches me (he is very understanding) I have flashbacksand remember what happened. Is this normal??Will it ever go away?? I feel bad cuz he is trying to help
I live in 60010. This goes to show you rich people don't get off easy.

(60010 is 1 of the wealthiest zips in the US.)
Would you ditch the girl cuz she didn't want sex??

I feel like somehow I was unfaithful to my bf becuz of all this. When I cry he goes to hold me but then I remember the guy and pull away. I feel bad cuz I know it'shis way of helping. Should I just let him and get over it??
BTW: no shrink for me!!

It was at my bf's party.Do you think if he knew what was going on he would've helped??

I trust him I just seem to have flashbackes with every touch from every1. What can I do to help change this?? Just let the flashbacks happen and they will get better. We used to be really "close"(i think u no what i mean) but now even a brush on my arm triggers it.Will it go away soon? It'sbeen about a week!!

Answer 1

therapy NOW!

and yes in time you will heal but first you need to face it and talk about it...time heals..but therapy speeds the process.

Answer 2

Hey Sweetheart it takes time. No two people are the same, but for the greater percentage of people this happens to yes it gets better but it is going to take time. I honestly dont think there is answer for why people do these things. Our society assumes alot of different reasons, but we are not the perps so how could we possiably know. As for your boyfriend, I would hope he would have helped you. Maybe you should ask him? It might just be a starting point for him to try to understand. Although his understanding will NEVER be complete, it might help. Flashbacks are normal for some time. However if it becomes to troubling there are medicines that can help. Just as a note, if you have note reported this Please allow me to say you should. If you have good for you and you should now that you did nothing to deserve this. Also as a note, if you have not reported and wish not to, thats your choice no one elses. (I never reported it) You can go to your doctor and get those meds Menttioned early to help with your nerves without reporting it. Those flashbacks are commonly known as PTSD ( post-traumatic stress disorder). It is common when people have had a traumatic experience. This occurs when the mind takes over to protect us when situations are to harsh to deal with, It blocks our pain and memory, but only for a time. Little things like the smell in the air , a simple touch, a sound just about anything can trigger or jolt if you will our memory and thus the flashback. I personally have been through similar, and My now husband but boyfriend then has been so supportive and understanding. It took us a while to get back intimacy and to get through the flashbacks. I on the other hand gave up and went to the doc and my doctor was very helpful. Yes the meds truely helped if you have the chance Personally recommend them. As for your boyfriend, Girlfriend if your relationship was meant to be he will ride this out with you. Your relationship will be that much more meaningful and loving, and will prove love can endure all. I dont know you but I wish I could just hug you and let you know your not alone. There are so many of us out here going through the same thing, Please be well and Good luck, remember to be open and honest with him, your bf cause you dont want to leave him in the dark cause Im sure hes feeling helpless as it is. God Bless You Darling

Answer 3

It happend to me 2x but i didnt need therapy nor would i have gone either. Everyone deals with it in their own way and belive me this happens to often and i bet some of your friends or coworkers, classmates whatever have been through it also. Find someone other than your boyfriend to talk to like another woman. Ask her what helped her and talk w/ your boyfriend. He is someone you can trust wants to be there for you. But he or anyone else cant help you unless you try and help yourself. its hard but you cant let this ruin your life. I dont know if you will ever get over it but i know that it will make you stronger once you come to terms with it. Dont forget it but dont let it run your thoughts and ruin what you have with the person who loves you. Sorry if this doesnt help but great if it does. Sadly molestation is very common no matter where you live.

Answer 4

It'll be okay I was molested from ages 3-11, the my ***** *** uncle didn't know I would relive that nightmare every time a guy got close to me. And I would never leave a person because of lack of sex, I don't think a lot of people would either. Whoever molested you did not realize how much it has hurt you and you WILL heal it just takes time. A good boyfriend wouldn't pressure you into it and he would let it all fall back into place. Don't cry hunny, you'll learn to trust people.

Answer 5

Honey coming from some one who has walked your shoes ..........I hate to tell you this but that is a long road of pain and healing. You need to get some serious help! Not that anything is your fault but if you do not find yourself someone to help you through this it can turn out real ugly for your future. www.lifetimetv.com have message boards that are great to help people that this has happen to. They also have resorces there such as phone numbers and organizations ect..... Sweetie sex to someone of your nature that has had issues is not the best thing in the world to face but it is something that one day will be a very important part of your life and you need help to understand how to get yourself to gether. As far as your boy friend if he is a friend and truly loves you he will wait and support you. I wish you luck on your journey healing. PS It happens everywhere rich poor it don't matter. It is sick but true.

Answer 6

I was molested. Yes, I was scarred for life. He did it for a bet with his friends. Yes, it's normal to have flashbacks. Only with therapy, and even with it, only little bits. I've forgiven the guy. It's not what he deserves, but I don't like the feeling of hating someone. Good luck.

Answer 7

Sometimes people do this to women because they go crazy over something like a girl they couldnt have or the way their life went. and it is normal that after this many people have flashbacks but with proper therapy they can eventually be forgotten. if i would have a girlfriend that was like that i would try to undersand her and sex is not important as long as you love the girl you can wait and when the moment comes make her feel better. you should try to talk to a psicologist or just talk to me is like the same thing...

Answer 8

I think you need counceling and what ever you do, be patient with yourself. Sounds like your boyfriend is a keeper. This reaction is normal and yes you'll get over it. You just need help getting over it. You can't do this alone. I can't tell you why there are child molesters. Some psychologist say it's because they have been molested themselves as a child. This may be true but they can break that cycle if they really wanted to.

Answer 9

Seek a couselor to help you throuth this. Yes in time yo will start to feel better about what has happened but you will never forget it. This something that will only take time to heal. Yes there are some very sick guys out there that get there jollies off by having forced sex with a girl but you need to realize that not all guy are like that. So please go to a couselor not for your boyfriend but for yourself.

Answer 10

Damn girl , you should see a psychiatrist , they have treatments to help you with not having those flashbacks. I know they do . Hope you get better.

Answer 11

I don't know why men do the things they do. but some men do it for the fun. I hate that happened to you. you might need to talk to a preacher or someone who can help you get over this. just be patient. i am sure you will be just fine. God Bless!!!!!!!!!!