This is an actual job application a 17 year old boy submitted at a McDonald's fast-food establishment in Florida... and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!
NAME: Greg Bulmash
SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.
DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.
DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.
EDUCATION: Yes.
LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.
SALARY: Less than I'm worth.
MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.
REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.
HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.
PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.
MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"
HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.
DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.
DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.
SIGN HERE: Aries.
2006-11-05 11:42:37 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
just wanted to share with you guys!
2006-11-05 11:42:59 · update #1
ah lol omg i luved it i luv all ur jokes omg lol rotflmfao
2006-11-05 13:03:36 · answer #1 · answered by im lost come and find me 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Very good. I think people should go to their job interviews after they've had a filling at the dentist as their mouth is swollen and they speak with a lisp! That would be funny too!
2006-11-05 21:58:48 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was incredible. I just wish he would have filled out the "Have you been convicted of a felony? If so what was it?" section. I have always thought it would be funny to put something like "Indescent exposure in a school zone" in that section lol
Great Joke!
2006-11-05 19:48:35 · answer #3 · answered by Creston M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was so funny!!
Earlier this week I was giving out a survey for my research class. And there is this guy who actually wrote beside the question "sex?" : "yes everyday, with my girlfriend".
2006-11-05 20:15:07 · answer #4 · answered by ♥ AnGeL oF cLaRiTy ♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats funny... Its kinda old, but who cares?????? I saw it on funny junk 2 months ago... It was fu-nny! With a capitol F!
2006-11-05 20:18:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
funniest thing in this category in a while...
thanks for the laugh
2006-11-05 19:45:56 · answer #6 · answered by Ananymos 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good job!
2006-11-05 20:16:08 · answer #7 · answered by lilmisslouievuitton 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG where in the world did you find that?
2006-11-05 19:46:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
nice cool awesome fuuuny weird!!!!! hahahaha
2006-11-05 19:44:58 · answer #9 · answered by ♥ღ...∂αηg3яσυѕℓу ιη ℓσν3...ღ♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
niiiice
2006-11-05 19:46:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋