I've been going out with a girl for a month who seemed really into me, but the other day seemed upset and told me that "I am everything she want's in a guy", but the closer she gets to me, the more she starts missing her ex of 4 years." This is a week after wanting to introduce me to her friends and paying for a $120.00 dinner for me. She says that she needs some time right now to gather her thoughts. What should I do?
2006-11-05 10:46:02 · 24 answers · asked by cityteach116 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Let her know how you feel about her and that you understand.She might be afraid of getting hurt or attached.
2006-11-05 10:57:07 · answer #1 · answered by Sweetheart 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well… she needs time… time away from you and time closer to her ex.
The simple truth is she hasn't gotten over her ex, she's involving herself in situations that her and her ex would have been involved with (ie, intro to her friends and picking up a tab), and is really looking for a way to justify her leaving you for her ex. Problems exist with two people, and for the most part, exist b/c of our ex's. I assume you have little contact with yours, and she has had much contact with hers.
Question? Have you slept with her yet? If your relationship has gone past three dates and you have not slept with her yet, then she is really pining over the sexual overtures of her ex-boyfriend, and maybe she's waiting for you to be more sexually aggressive. But, probably not. If you haven't slept with her yet, she really just wants to sleep with her ex. Women enjoy the feel from a man that gave them a three-second feel of life; especially if that woman is competing for affection from another women involved in his life. This is a fact you will need to face.
The truth is her ex will sleep with her, drop her like a bad habit, and may come crawling back to you. You need to let this happen, and let nature work its course. In the meantime, you need to find a playmate to pass the time until your g/f comes back, and which point… you completely end your relationship!
You need to get back into the drivers' seat of your life, and quit being reactionary. FYI for your new playmate… you need to take her out a lot, get socially noticed with your new babe, spend a hell of a lot more than $120 on dinner and drinks, make the sweetest love to your new babe as you honestly can, and make your g/f jealous as hell. This will go a long way towards your ego!
2006-11-05 11:13:25 · answer #2 · answered by diagofaldi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is being somewhat honest but not totally. U R bringing up some memories that she can't get over yet and she doesn't want to hurt u.The $ made her feel better maybe. Let her have her time. Write her a short honesat note telling her how ya feel. Good luck!
2006-11-05 10:51:08 · answer #3 · answered by rhonda_seiler 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sounds a bit confused. How long has she been away from her ex? Knowing that might help you to know how much time to give her. You certainly don't want to be a rebound. Your relationship will only go so far if that's the case. My suggestion is to give her the space she's asked for. "If you love me set me free, if I come back it was meant to be."
2006-11-05 10:51:17 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her go. Give her the space that she wants. If she doesn't figure out what a good person you are, this isn't someone you should waste any precious time on. After all, why would you want to devote yourself to someone whose heart is not in it?
2006-11-05 10:49:41 · answer #5 · answered by Zengirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if she's still missing her ex back off a lil bit and let her gather her thoughts , i mean he is an ex for a reason right
2006-11-05 10:52:56 · answer #6 · answered by mzlyte 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's breaking up with you, just like my ex did a few months back. They wait for your most vonurable moment to stab you in the heart!
2006-11-05 10:50:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's not over her ex, and she's not ready for you either so give her some space....maybe if you give her time to breathe she might come around....
2006-11-05 10:50:12 · answer #8 · answered by bellita_716 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You everything thing she wants in a guy, but is this guy you? Give her some space.
2006-11-05 10:53:28 · answer #9 · answered by Honey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
........your'e probably a nice guy, but maybe she want's tuh check out other guy's as well, but cant corz your'e there...... She does'nt sound quite ready, to commit to the one boy, at the moment, so it might be better if you consider doing likewise.....
2006-11-05 10:55:27 · answer #10 · answered by peanut 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋