Me and my gf have been dating for a year now. We both want to sleep together but we know we shouldnt. Twice now that weve had close calls. We want to wait till maybe marriage or atleast till we can find a special place to be alone so we can enjoy it.
Lately its been so hard for me. Sometimes we are making-out and I begin to loose control. I dont want to be this way, and I need to control my urges. What can I do?
2006-11-05 10:15:01 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I really want to give you my advise based on my experience. Others are advising you to eat papaya, cold showers, etc, but i do believe that it will not solve your problem but more so it will drive your urge further. I considered myself a sex maniac before I used to masturbate 5 times a day but for now i am now improving. the key is your thinking or what enters your mind. You can actually control what you will be thinking or ideas that you entertain on your mind. Even when you are with your girlfriend alone in bed both naked and if your mind is strongly resolved not to have sex then you will don't do it no matter what. So the key is focus and mind control and conditioning. Sex and masturbation and the likes initiates from a very very little idea or sight that triggers or caters on your sexual fantasy such as seeing a sexy woman or parts of her body or a sexy scene on tv, etc. If you can control your mind not to entertain thought pertaining to sex then it is very possible. I proved to myself that mind is powerful over our body. Believe me. Hope this helps you.
2006-11-07 06:55:15 · answer #1 · answered by arnold g 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hmm...Well here are a few options...
1. Lessen the intensity of the romantic sessions.
2. Go out in public more
3. Focus on something else during it and it will dissapate
4. Wear a belt backwards. If things get too intense, you will become more frustrated by it than aroused.
5. Work together on the problem with your girlfriend. If she agrees with you, you both can work something out.
Good luck.
2006-11-05 18:22:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
take time away from her or try not to do things that trigger a reaction like that. kissing is okay along as you don't french kiss because that is a way to lead up to something you aren't ready for. it's a subconcious thing and the tongue going in the mouth is kinda like a type of pentration or a showing of the physical urge to have sexual intercourse with her. stay away from making out as well because when you do things like that it makes your body want to go farther. it's an animal urge that makes you want her that way. you may be human and smart than the animal species but human's urges are purely animalistic and based on animal instinct instead of common knowledge. i believe we act more animal when sex is envolved than huiman. it is a natural thing in life and we all have the urge to be needed and loved. that is just one way of dealing with and showing love towards one we care about. that is what separates us from the animals. human have a greater intelligence and can show more emotions. plus we know when to stop.
2006-11-05 18:25:43 · answer #3 · answered by demonswt88 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Cold showers and keeping a firm hand on things helped my man. Good luck to both of you, you are making the right decision!
2006-11-05 18:20:42 · answer #4 · answered by shojo 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
You need to slow down your making-out sessions before they get to intense. Take cold showers. Think about non-sexual things. If all else fails, get some lotion or lube and take matters into your own hands, so to speak.
2006-11-05 18:29:53 · answer #5 · answered by A 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Try to not make out so much. Try not to be alone and get the urge to even make out. Just keep reminding yourself that you want to wait.
2006-11-05 18:17:39 · answer #6 · answered by ♥dream_angel♥ 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I understand exactly what you're going through. And I respect your decision not to engage in premarital sex.
I'm not sure what you can do as my boyfriend tends to have that problem sometimes to... Best I can say is maybe try masterbating more? I don't really know... I'm sorry...
Well...I know I wasn't too helpful... I hope you find a way. Good luck!!!
2006-11-05 18:20:01 · answer #7 · answered by StarlightRedemption 3 · 1⤊ 3⤋
Taking cold showers often does help some...but it's not going to for everyone....there are medications for this too...and just try to to make-out as much and try to keep hold of your temptations...you are doing the right thing by waiting.
2006-11-05 18:48:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋
try to have people around you more often, and remember that sex is a sacred thing that God intended for married husbands and wives. if you start feeling lustful about your girlfriend, stop making out or whatever and just calm down and watch a movie or go out in public or something. if you trust God and believe in Him, everything will turn out right.
2006-11-05 18:20:16 · answer #9 · answered by Dont Steal My Bongo 1 · 2⤊ 2⤋
the only thing you can do is take a cold shower... i wish i could reduce my sex drive too. it's just something you have to really try to keep under control. good luck!
2006-11-05 18:18:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋