He says that she is a wonderful mom, but that she is a sorry wife. She doesn't even get up to make him lunch and she doesn't satisfy him like he wants. I mean, why does he have to tell me all this when I don't ask and when he knows that I care for him and I respect that he has a commitment with marriage? I have asked him why is it that he won't leave her and he says because she would leave him with nothing. Can somebody give me some advice?
2006-11-05 09:33:09 · 39 answers · asked by Ladyinred 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Run away! Fast!
Even if he did someday leave her, would you really want to step into her shoes? Then he would be somewhere else with someone else saying the same things about you. How would you ever trust him? The man is a manipulator and not worth your time and trouble.
2006-11-05 09:38:13 · answer #1 · answered by gatheringplace2002 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Stay out of his marital issues and when he comes to you with his drama, tell him politely he should be talking to his wife and trying to make his marriage work. There are two sides to every story and I'm sure his wife has a few things she could tell you about him also. I've seen men like him before and what he wants is to have his cake and eat it too. If you were low enough to play into his immature game he would have you in bed in a heartbeat. His statement about his wife being a sorry wife is just an excuse to make him feel less guilty about what he's up to and to make you feel sorry for him and give you the impression his wife deserves whatever she gets. Please don't fall for it. You may think he's the love of your life, but I can say without a doubt he's not the one for you. He can't be trusted......he's proved that by the way he's acting. Find a guy of your own and try to stay away from this loser. Hope it all works out for you.
2006-11-05 09:46:00 · answer #2 · answered by softlyinspired 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He has his cake and eating it too....so the saying goes. Yes, his wife could very well be a wonderful mother, but he is being a very self-centered, selfish bastard! Unless you know for sure what his wife is like and if what he tells you is the honest truth, you can only base judgment on what is "word of mouth" and look at your source...a cheater. Everything he tells you is only to ease the guilt he is feeling...he's saying all these negative things about his wife to justify what he is doing behind her back. When push comes to shove....will he really be there for you? Are you content to stay in the shadows, never being able to tell people about your "love"? And you have to ask yourself: "Do you really want to be with a man who cheated to be with you? Can you ever truly trust him?" He won't leave his wife because she is a source of "security", someone he can run back to when things with you get too rough for him to handle, he keeps you on the side because you provide him an easy escape, a temporary diversion from his real life and an extra bed to cozy into. You give him the sex he craves that he had before he became "husband" and "father"....he feels "young", virile" while he's with you. So before you get any deeper in this affair, THINK of how you would feel if you found out your husband was cheating on you and go from there. Good luck.....
2006-11-05 11:02:14 · answer #3 · answered by AngelEyes In SF 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I will. Why would you want to be drug into somebody else's relationship. like it or not, that is what you have done. You are just his side kick, nothing more. The truth hurts but if he cared about you he wouldn't still be married. You should never believe a married mans excuses as to why he needs someone else. you are being so played and I wouldn't doubt his wife is perfect! he is just a slime ball. He will never leave his wife for you. he's got both now, why make any changes.
You are a fool for falling into this one...sorry...
I have zero respect for anyone that would get involved with a married man or woman. NONE!
Maybe someday you will get married. Don't get your panties in a wad if your hubby cheats! You get what ya give in this life.
~T~
2006-11-05 09:41:40 · answer #4 · answered by ~*bUtteRFy~*~kISSeS*~ 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My advice would be to stay away from him. First and foremost, if he is talking about his wife like that and he does eventually decide to leave her and begin a relationship with you, do you think that he may talk about you like that when he gets bored with you? Secondly, there is a commitment between his wife and him, and you have feelings for him....you should definately live this alone. I understand that you know there is a commitment there, but there is no reason for you to complicate the matters anymore. How would you feel if you were in a relationship and you knew that your significant other had a 'friendship' like you and this guy? You would be a little miffed. Live this alone. Nothing good can come of this. This guy doesn't sound like a great guy at all.
2006-11-05 09:39:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You really dont want to be the reason for him leaving his family do you? Alot of relationships are ruined by "the other woman" or "the other man". It's sad that he thinks it's ok to have you on the side of a family, it really is sad. And you, as being the "other woman" should have more respect for his wife and their children to be involved with him knowing all of this. He can NOT have both. If he is doing this to her and their children dont you think it can happen to you too? Most likely it will when another woman comes along who has more to offer him than you. Really, you should step back and take a good long hard look at what is going on here. You ONLY know what he has told you, that's all. You dont know what type of woman she is or how she treats him as a husband.
2006-11-05 09:39:42 · answer #6 · answered by Help Me Help You 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Cut off communication with him. He does not feel about you the way you feel about him. The next thing you know, you'll be the Other Woman. It always starts off with "She doesn't...."
He's playing you. He knows how you feel. He doesn't care about you because if he did, he wouldn't torture you with these questions. If you really respected that the was married, you would tell him to talk to his wife and work it out and to leave you the hell alone.
You really need to evaluate what this guy is all about and why he continues to be the love of your life.
2006-11-05 09:39:27 · answer #7 · answered by Le_Roche 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My advice to you is get you a real man. I know that sounds mean but your gonna get your heart broke with this man. No matter how much he talks about his wife if he really truely wanted to leave her he would. That she'll leave me with nothing crap sounds like an excuse to me. If this man loved you like you love him then he wouldn't stay with someone making him unhappy. He is either running game or being a coward and you don't need either.
2006-11-05 09:38:57 · answer #8 · answered by K@t 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
yep - move on - he's not going to leave her, he's hung up on the material part of his marriage and don't want to lose them. Think about it, he has the best of both worlds, all the materialistic stuff in his marriage, plus a family and you to satisfy his needs that he ain't getting at home - would you want another woman interferring if it were you?
2006-11-05 09:42:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's probably hoping that you will "fulfill" his "needs" out of sympathy. I'd steer clear of that one. Sounds like he wants some side fun. He'll find someone else to feel sorry for him. Protect your own self. Messing with a married man will get you no where but down in the dumps. Be careful.
2006-11-05 09:39:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anne 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋