My 12 year old daughter ia making out, what should I do???

Question

My 12 year old daughter(Cheyene) has been literally making out in the back yard!! I wasn't spying, I was going to shut the back door & I saw her. Her boyfriend started putting his hand up her shirt. What should I do??? Please answer ASAP!! THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!

Okay her "boyfriend" is our neighbor. We trusted the kid until now, that why they WERE allowed to hang out together!!!

Answer 1

You should probably try to talk to her about it before it gets too late. If her making out scares you, wait till she's past that stage. If you don't talk to her, she'll be onto other things very soon. Bring it up casually and try not to make her feel like a bad person for doing it. If her boyfriend is pressuring her into doing things, you can either tell her that it might be better if she doesn't date right now, or you can have a little chat with her boyfriend about how to treat a lady.
Good luck to you and your daughter!

Answer 2

Well since I basically live in Disney I can say for sure that you will love it! For your 5 year old daughter they have this place in Downtown Disney called the Bibbiti Bobbiti Boutique where they transform you into a princess. I am sure your daughter would love that. You should go to Magic Kingdom because there are a ton of princess type things to do. I just got back from Disney today and I remember in the Magic Kingdom you could meet Ariel and Snow White I believe. I do not know where you are staying but if you are at the Grand Floridian resort they have a Sleeping Beauty Tea Party that is wonderful! Although it is around one hundred fifty dollars it is a great experience! Usually you can find a character breakfast with some princesses. I remember in the Grand Floridian Resort 2 years ago I went to a character dinner with Cinderella the Step Mother and daughters, and Prince Charming. Sorry sorta tired can't think of anything else at the moment! Hope I helped!!!!!!!! Enjoy your trip!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 3

I don't have any kids, but I have seen such behavior when I was her age. Ok kissing is ok, but feeling up her shirt is not. I would call them in the house and make them sit in the living room or at the kitchen table. Then would explain to both of them what you saw and make them understand that it is ok to have a boyfriend, but not feeling up the shirt thing. For now on when he comes over, them two are to be in your presence at all times and then the bird and the bees talk. You should also talk to his parents about what you saw so they are aware of the situation. However, if you strictly punished them in any way, they will find a place you where you may not know where they are doing it again in spite of your home laws. They will do it at his house, basement, playground, bedroom, at school with out teachers seeing them, at someone else house, who knows where they will do it. They will do it behind you back, and try to hide it from you regardless you want them not to do it or not. Remember, Kids are rebellious. I would keep them in the same room as you are at all times, and keep them busy doing homework, games, etc....Also you should talk to your daughter alone and tell her what boys and men only think most of the time and what they are only after. You know teenage boys and young adults are only after one thing? Good luck on stopping the problem before it starts to become a troubling problem.

Answer 4

My 12 yr old has a "boyfriend". This is a young man who, when he comes over, we plan activities for them to do they both enjoy (movies, trips to museums, baking cookies, etc.) with adult supervision. If they choose to sit outside and talk, or go to the park, they know I will check on them frequently, without warning. Both the young man's parents and I have had discussions individually with out children about what behavior is accpetable for thier age and development levels. The parents and I also have a very open level of communication and any plans involve both sets of parents talking them out first.

For a 12 yr. old to have a "boyfriend" beyond the level of a "friend they like more than other friends" is running a huge risk. To allow that behavior in your home is sending a message that you simply are not willing or are too afraid to address the issue, First, speak with the boys parents. They may be surprised as well. Hopefully, all of you can work out an agreement about when and how long the kids can see one another and what sort of activities are allowed, along with how much supervision they should have. If this happens, sit down with the kids and lay it out for them. If the boy's parent's are not willing to get involved, then you need to speak to the kids yourself. First, speak to your daughter on her own. Make it very clear to her that you are distressed with what you have seen and that, at no age, will that behavior ever be welcomed in your home. When the young man comes over, sit them both down together and repeat what you have told your daughter. Lay down the ground rules as to when they may spend time together, what is allowed and what isn;t and that if you see any further inapporiate behavior (and be very clear about what that is), the young man will be asked to leave and your daughter will find herself grounded. How you handle this now is going to set the tone for the next several years. Be firm, stay clam and follow through no matter what.

Answer 5

No offense, but why would you even allow your 12 yr. old daughter to have a boyfriend? That is way to young. You need to sit down and explain to her that she is still too young to be doing those type of things. However, I suggest you don't tell her in an angry manner. If you do, she won't listen and will find another way to be with her boyfriend so they can make out. Be calm about the situation and make it clear that you are her mother and are only trying to help. Good luck.

Answer 6

You should have stopped it as soon as you saw their lips touching each other. Call that boy's parents and explain to them what you saw them doing. It also be a good idea if they don't see each other anymore. You might even want to ground her if she knows what she's doing is wrong and inappropriate.

Then sit down and explain everything to her. Menses (if she hasn't had it already), sex in all forms, sexually transmitted diseases, pregnancy and it's affects on your body, as well as what behaviors with boys are off-limits. Also, you need to talk with her about learning how to be proactive in setting her own boundaries. Explain to her that it's okay to say no when a boy asks her to do something that she shouldn't be doing or if she's not comfortable with it. And explain to her that they should take no for an answer. Also tell her how to avoid putting herself into these situations, and giving her the no using alcohol and drugs talk as well, you can tell her something along the lines of 'drugs and alcohol makes you not able to control all of your actions and you can lose consciousness and then fall asleep and you won't be able to stop people from doing bad things to you.'

Answer 7

You need to put a stop to it, right NOW. My daughter is 12 and she is not allowed to have a boyfriend until she is 16 or so. I lost my virginity at 12. I was a mother at 15. You need to step up and tell her that is totally unacceptable and not allow her to see him again. My son is 10. He will not have a girlfriend until he is 16. That is something they will have to live with, because I will not be changing my mind on it. They have many years to worry about this kind of crap, no need to start so young.

Answer 8

Wow! She's so young to be doing that! I think you need to sit down and talk with her about what is appropriate and inappropriate. She needs to know that you do not approve of the way she was acting with her boyfriend. Definitely make sure that this boy is out of the picture as much as possible - I would definitely ground her. It's time to sit down and talk to her about morals and all that. And just practical consequeces - at 12, it would be bad to be labeled as "easy" or "a slut." She'd be happier in the long run if she has time to cool down this relationship. She won't be happy with you now, but you're the parent - take charge of the situation!

Answer 9

Biggest question is how does your daughter feel about herself! If she feels need to allow boys take all they can get get to attract one, then you have problems. She is very close to age when low level making out happens. This is important but over used statement: Keep communication between you as older wiser person and you daughter open. Explain your feelings about her behavior and reasons for these feelings, and try to find ways to build her self-concept if necessary, and gently add more structure into her life explaining as best you can one line my mother used with my sisters: Males don't buy the cow if they can get the milk free.

Answer 10

If you really love her, sit down with her and tell her that you are not pleased with such behavior. Also come in contact with the boy and his parents and donn't be shy or bashful or try to save face...let it be known that you will not tolerate such behavior out of him or your daughter.

Have you really explained sex to your daughter? Well now is a perfect time to get her informed before you become a young grandparent. Explain to her about morality as well. Help her to be morally strong and wise in the face of a our growing world of sexual immorality. We don't need another broken down family because a parent failed to speak up...do your job! Good luck!