So so lonely?

Question

Its bben 5 weeks since my BU. I have this empty empty feeling inside me. Everyone around me is in a relationship. Have no friends that are single. I try to keep myself occupied but nothing seems to be working. I keep thinking about my ex bf and wish I could just call him and have him want to see me and spend sometime with him. I am so incredibly lonely that I have no idea what to do about it. I have my family, a have 1 close friend and a couple acquaintances but my ex is the one I miss the most. I just want to call him and talk to him. But I know talking to him will just make me feel worst. I know he would talk to me - but he doesn't want to be with me. I miss him like crazy and I am going crazy in my head. Nothing nothing is working. i work full time, I go to University part time, I go to the gym. Nothing is working at all.....Someone help me....Shoul I call him even if it would comfort me for one minute.....

Answer 1

Unfortunately, it's going to take some time for that feeling to go away. I lived with a guy for 12 years, we were crazy about each other, then things got bad and he split. I met another guy just a couple of months later-- I didn't really like him that much but saw it as a way to distract myself from feeling really bad, plus it made my ex boyfriend jealous so that was kinda cool. I just broke up with that guy a few months ago after having a very strange relationship for nearly seven years (he was in prison for most of that time). Now I can feel the loneliness starting to creep back in. There are other guys that I like and I have a few friends, but no one who is "special"-- and I admit I miss that. But I know I can't force it; I just have to let it happen. At least I don't sit and obsess over one person anymore. It took about a year for that feeling to go away.

It's hard for me to give advice to someone in your situation, because really some time needs to pass before you start feeling better. I would say DON'T call your ex. Do try to stay busy even if your heart's not in it. Try to think of something you always wanted to do but never did before, and get involved in that thing. For me, I found that I really enjoy taking road trips and wandering around, visiting various places, all by myself or with my dogs. Going on road trips was a drag before when trying to get my boyfriend to go with me-- I found I'm much happier by myself and I have a lot more fun. I mean, I was fairly miserable for quite awhile, but one day I found myself sitting in a nice area after having ridden my motorcycle for a few hundred miles; I was just sitting and digging the scenery, smoking a cigar and sipping wine from my pocket flask, and quite suddenly it dawned on me that I was REALLY, REALLY happy. That was my "cure". I had gone through all that pain and I was happy again, and it didn't depend on another person, if you can see what I'm saying.

And finally: The internet is actually a great thing for people who are lonely. I have met people in chat rooms and on forums that became good friends in real life. Yes, there are a lot of jerks, weirdos, and freaks in chat rooms and discussion forums-- but at least on the net you have an "ignore" button. It's a lot safer way to socialize.

You're not alone in this. A lot of people (like me, for instance) have experienced what is happening to you right now and they got through it. You can get through it, too. Good luck!

Answer 2

Instead of sitting around and thinking about being lonely why don't you take up a new hobby, take some classes, get out and make yourself happy. Then when you find true love you will be a happy whole person who can bring her fair share to the relationship.

Pity parties and going back to an old boyfriend for the reasons you state are not very healthy.

Move on and as time goes by you will feel less alone. IF you are a student put your time and energy into bringing your grades up so you can get into a good college.

You will have many loves and relationships in your life until you find the right guy for you.

peace

Answer 3

Hi Jovy... It's very hard what you have to go through, I can relate. I've been living the same situation since last year, I broke up with my GF who was my absolutely best friend. She's now seeing another person, so I cannot call her anytime like I used to. I live in Santiago, Chile, I practically have no friends here, I moved to this place about 3 years ago (I'm not originally from Chile). I work, go to the gym, and do whatever to keep my mind busy, but sometimes I think I will just go crazy in the solitude.

I think you should call him, even if it will comfort you briefly, but also it's very important that if you see no future in your relationship with him, you meet other people, not necessarily to start a new relationship, but just to befriend other people... loneliness is a horrible feeling.

Answer 4

I'm a men. I'm lonely by choice. Single is simple, free to go, own time, some responsibility, wonderful vacations, no stress of kissing somebodies as s for favors. I know who I want is just very difficult to find the person and trust. I don't care whatever happened and future brings me , is OK.

Answer 5

Why dont u try and get a hobbie or somthing like collecting somthing or just spend some time with some friends.

Answer 6

i feel the SAME way sometimes.
Its a horrible feeling of hopelessness.
Just call him for fun and ask what is happening.
I think it will help ease the pain.
And if you have any more problems just email me girl, k? have a good day

Answer 7

Im so lonely, oh so lonely, i have nobody to call my own, oh so so so so lonely

thats hot right there

Answer 8

Don't call him. You'll get over this.

Answer 9

you should call him ... you still love him .. that\'s for sure ..

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Answer 10

if he doesn't wanna be with you, find someone else to be with...