I am being forced to go to Church by my parents, and I don't want to go, because I don't feel like I get anything out of it. I have been going to Church my whole life, and I have always felt this way. Whenever don't go to Church with my parents, they yell at me and punish me. I've tried telling them that my beliefs are different than theirs, but they still insist on me going to church. What should I do to keep them from punishing me whenever I don't go to Church?
2006-11-05 06:06:07 · 23 answers · asked by homeslice191 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I've talked to them numerous times about why I don't want to go, but they never hear me out.
2006-11-05 06:13:42 · update #1
I'm Presbyterian
2006-11-05 06:18:27 · update #2
I'm 16, and I've been actively involved in the Church until about a year ago, when I realized that my parents were just forcing Church on me.
2006-11-05 06:19:44 · update #3
When you tell them you don't want to go to church, don't do it in anger. Wait until things are good between you (not on Sunday morning, pick another time). Ask if you could talk to them about something important to you (taking the initiative shows maturity). And don't forget to tell them that you love them and respect them a lot.
Say "Mom n dad. I love you and respect you a lot. You know this. Lately we've been fighting about going to church and I've heard your side of this. I want to ask you to listen to me for 90 seconds. That's all I ask. I've been going to church all my life. I know very well what you believe and what the church teaches by now. All your years of teaching me haven't gone to waste! In just __ years I'm going to be on my own and making ALL my own decisions about everything. I would like to begin making some of those decisions now, and one of them is to not be forced to go to church. I have respected your position on chruch for years and now I ask that you respect mine. I think, deepdown, you know that FORCING anybody isn't going to lead to anything good."
Good luck.
2006-11-05 06:14:38 · answer #1 · answered by Black Parade Billie 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Your parents have a misguided way of believing they can help you become a better person. The more you fight, the more they fight back. Be understanding of their flaws and talk with a normal voice about what you believe. If it ends up 'if you want to live in this house, you go to church', then you have some thinking to do. Maybe, since it is only a couple hours, you can stand a bit more time with it and they will wear down, let you make up your own mind.
2006-11-05 14:11:41 · answer #2 · answered by TCFKAYM 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's probably not much you can do if they insist you go. You are a minor, living under their roof. Unfortunately, you just have to stick it out. However, while you're at church you could take this time to use your imagination. We have wonderful minds, and we can be creative using visualization in our heads. I imagine you sitting through service bored as I'll get out. So put your mind in a different world. Create stories, create a scene you like, or anything. You start out by relaxing and then you put a clean slate in your mind and start creating. Time will go quickly, and you'll look like an obedient kid!
I do this when I'm in situations when can't leave, and I'm bored. use your inagination to create stories. I know this sounds funny or odd. I would rather say, " bring your head phones and listen to music, or play your nintendo game"....but you'd just get punished for it. Good luck.
2006-11-05 14:20:17 · answer #3 · answered by sweeta : 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't act like a rebellious teen all the time, and don't try to piss them off. If you do, and you have this feeling about church, they might think you're going through a phase or something and will doubtfuly take you seriously. Be mature when this comes up, don't whine, cry, or beg, don't yell at them or accuse them of anything. Sit down with them calmly (NOT on a Sunday when they're in a hurry to get to church on time!) and explain what you are feeling and not feeling. Say that you're not benefitting from your attendance like you think you should, and your beliefs don't match. Tell them it's always been this way. Calmly and maturely tell them what's up. Say that you don't want to pretend you believe something when you don't, and that God would want you to be true to yourself. I hope this helps. Good luck, and Blessed Be!
2006-11-05 14:14:51 · answer #4 · answered by Rachel the Atheist 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋
I can see your point if you get nothing out of it. I am interested in what church you are refering to. I go to church and just got back as a matter of fact, I love studying Gods word. And the worship is Awesome. And God uses my Pastor to speak to me through him. Once you have an experience such as this and you are touched by the Holy Spirit you will love going to church. But this will not happen at the wrong church.
2006-11-05 14:16:09 · answer #5 · answered by ditzhitz 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Have you considered Jesus Christ at your church and asked Him to come into your heart.
Do you love God?
Some churches don't teach about Jesus Christ and His Good News. So I hope you aren't being forced to go to one of these.
If your parents are forcing you to go to a true Christian Church then they are doing right by having you go to church with them. You are then suffering from a rebellious spirit. Or it's a church that isn't a true Christian church and you don't want to learn false doctrines.
So, when someone is born of God, will ask God to protect them inside a false christian church, That the spirit of truth will give child discernment in what is true. Honor your parents in the LORD, that you may have a long life.
2006-11-05 14:15:00 · answer #6 · answered by t a m i l 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Talk to the priest/pastor/minister/whatever. More then likely, he or she will be able to reason with your parents. Assuming that this does not happen, however, you can either lie to your parents and tell them that you are going to another church (probably a bad idea) or you can simply refuse to go and accept the consequennces for it. You also have the option of just biting the bullet and going to church until you're old enough to move out, or you mght be able to strike a compromise with the parents. See if they'll let you get out of all, or at least some, church meetings if you do something else worthwhile....maybe some volunteer work, or something.
2006-11-05 14:12:36 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 4⤋
What's your religion? First of all, have a talk with them about what your religion is to dispel any stereotypes or anything bad. Next tell them why you feel that your religion is right for you. After that, tell them you feel horrible when they take you to church and why and hope they understand. A parent shouldn't force their child to believe anything. It makes the child seem like a slave!!
e-mail me. svincenzam100@yahoo.com
2006-11-05 14:16:44 · answer #8 · answered by Parvati 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Read the Book "Letter to a Christian Nation" By Sam Harris. Then, if you find yourself believing the way that Sam writes, then kindly ask your parents to read it.
Since they are your parents, treat them with kindess and dignity in this situation. Arguments won't get you very far.
2006-11-05 14:30:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Grace unto you, and peace,
from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
Re-mind them of a STERN biblical exhortation:
"forbid(law) them not": Mt 19:14; Mk 10:14; Lk 18:16
And of a stated result for ADULTS who off end children:
it'd be better for them to have had mafia style drowning:
Mt 18:16; Mk 9:42; Lk 17:2; Rev 18:21
Legalism is the most harmful thing there is.
And sadly the churches are full of legalists.
Spiritual abuse is the hardest to recover from.
Remind them the law is "mortal", had an expiry date:
http://www.godshew.org/ShewBread9.htm#Expired
Is why God didn't send his Son, till law expired: Gal 4
Remind them the end of the Bible is the "last trump" it:
http://www.godshew.org/RevelatorySermons13.htm
The GRACE of our Lord Jesus Christ WITH YOU ALL. AMEN.
2006-11-05 14:28:19 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋