Crying out for help..............?

Question

I am getting to the point where i have just had enough
i feel so misserable
i see a thearpist but finding it hard to tell her how i feel sometime ( incase she judges) i know she shouldnt but i need to tell her i just had enough but i am scared of the outcomes of telling her this? and i always find it hard to tell her face to face, anyone got any other ideas?

Answer 1

Therapists don't "judge" that is why you go to them instead of discussing your problems with relatives or friends. If you don't disclose how you are really feeling you are not only wasting your time and hers, you are making your life worse.

How about writing down how you feel and tell her you prefer to do it that way for a while. She can read what you wrote and then discuss it with you.

Not being honest with your therapist tells me you cannot be honest with yourself or others either. That can cause big problems in your life. I suggest you open up and feel safe with her and start writing all your feeling down on paper. That way, you get it out of your head and onto the paper, very cathartic.

Answer 2

It is not uncommon to feel so low you can't function - including telling your therapist. The advice to write about how you feel is often a good one, as long as you don't use it as an excuse to be too self indulgent and morose. Doing that can drag you lower. Actually, the way that such writings help is that they take away the emotion and in just plain black and white the problems look a lot more trivial than they feel, which funnily enough can sometimes be a real disappointment- some people know that in advance and resist comitting to print.

As an alternative, do something which will completely take over your mind - something all engrossing, e.g. running, any exercise will do, the break away from your thoughts will do you good. Shove on some loud music, and really concentrate on something else. Think about only things which make you smile and laugh (I know that bit is really hard ) and keep it going for as long as possible.

Lastly, try not to be alone, even people who you don't like are better than being stuck by yourself whilst you feel this way. Soon it will begin to fade.

Answer 3

Why not write out your feelings? How about a journal? If you do not feel comfortable with your current therapist, perhaps you should check out someone else. Sometimes, if you ask your friends, you would be surprised just how many people see "someone". I am lucky to have found a wonderful therapist that half my co workers have been to at one time or another. I wish you the best of luck and don't give up, it will get better :)

Answer 4

You need to find a new therapist -- one with whom you are comfortable with. It's important to have a feeling of trust and comfort with your therapist.

Don't quit your therapist without telling her why you are going somewhere else.

Also it's really important to stay with her until you have gotten the other one lined up and ready to switch.

Don't risk having in=between time without some form of support - even if the one you have now isn't optimal. It might help to ask around - ask your family doctor for a referral or ask friends if they know someone whois good. You will learn a lot about a your options before you switch.

Also really make sure you let the therapist you have now, know that you aren't completely comfortable. I know it's hard, but you have to think about this --

If she isn't making you feel comfortable - it may something that is going on with other patients as well. By making her aware of it -- You may be able to help other patients as well.

Just be sure to take care of yourself and be careful during the change. It's hard to make changes, but in the long run you may have a better relationship with your tharapist.

Therapist really don't come in a one-size fits- all category. Some are just better suited for you personaility wise than others.

Hang in there and kudos for having a therapist and for getting someone to help out. Long run it can make a big change for the positive.

(I had the same therapist for twelve years who got me through a really rough time -- It's amazing to look back and to see how well I am doing now by comparision.

When I moved and had to switch - It was really hard to find someone with that same understanding. But I hung in there and was able to find someone. It's taken time, but I now feel like he helps a lot.

I still write letters occaisionally to my previous therapist letting him know how I and my family are doing.)

Don't give up and hand in there!

Answer 5

i had the same problem with the psychiatrist i was seeing i thought if i said how i really thought and felt she would judge me and think yes you are daft etc.
but do you know i got to the point where i could bottle up my thoughts and feelings and before i told her everything i kept saying but your going to think I'm silly and I'll go home and not want to face you again cos you'll have made your mind up about me and I'll be embarrassed after much talking i finally said what I'd been wanting to say
i expected her to laugh or ;look at me like i was stupid but she didn't she started to work out how to put things into perspective and i felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders
tell your therapist i can assure you she WILL NOT JUDGE
hope i've helped :)

Answer 6

if you are close to a family member or friends talk to them, if not a therapist is not there to judge, they are there to help no matter what, I've had problems myself and i found it easier talking to a therapist because i am sure they have heard it all or similar before and they are on neutral ground.
you may find it easier once you have gained a little more trust with the therapist, opening up about your problems is the first big step and the hardest to take but trust me once you've taken that step it will become a lot easier. i hope you manage to open up and get the help you need. good luck. xx

Answer 7

I often have trouble with what I feel is confrontational situations. I will often write what I want to say down. Sometimes I give this to the person other times I practice and just say what is on the paper.Maybe your therapist and you need to explore different avenues of communication until you feel more comfortable with face to face verbalization.

Answer 8

I feel for you, I am a strict Orthodox Christian, and I have to go to confession every month, I know it is SO hard to tell the priest what I have done wrong, I feel as if he will look at me and say "oh goodness, she did so and so what a bad person." You need to remember that the therapist is there to help you, not judge you. Eventually you will get over your fears as i did of confession.

Answer 9

your going to a therapist is a good thing but you need to be honest with her or she will not be able to help you ,,, they do not judge >>>> if you do find it imposable to tell her face to face maybe you could schedule a phone appointment with her or write all the things your not telling her and have her read it before your next appointment, maybe that would help you be more honest with her as she needs all the truth before she can help you ,,,, good luck, this isn't a easy time for you right now

Answer 10

Sweety, you need counseling. If you are afraid to speak to even your counselor you have severe social anxiety and very, very poor self-esteem.

Remember, your counselor works for YOU, not the other way around. If she judges you, she is a crappy counselor. Just this ONE time, write down ALL your feelings and give them to her...send them if you must...but you need to be getting the right kind of counseling and I am not sure she is giving it to you.

The relationship between a counselor and a client MUST be one of complete trust, a bond. I have had awful counselors before, they are not that uncommon. Basically, especially for you, you need to LIKE your counselor or your therapy is going to be a waste of time. Good luck hun.