Did having a second child feel different? I love both my girls so much, but it seems like I have much more enjoyment in the beginning stages with my 2nd baby, let me explain. With my first daughter I was a young inexpierenced mother and was worried about everything! I seemed so hard to jusy enjoy being with the baby. Now that I have had expierence and am older, I can enjoy and relax my baby with more ease, hope you ladies understand what i mean by that....??? There is a 7 year gap between my girls. Please give me your personal expierences with having your second child and how it ws different. Thanks so much! God Bless all you great mother's out there!
2006-11-05 00:55:14 · 12 answers · asked by Jm 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Honey it is normal. When I had my first daughter I was 22 and a widow as my husband got killed three months before she was born in Desert Storm, oh I loved her and wanted her more than anything but I was always worried was I doing it right, could I raise her alone etc. When my second one was born 6 1/2 years later it was so different I had a husband there to help and was more relaxed I still worried but it wasn't the same as the first time around, when my sons were born I felt like a pro by then. It is natural to relaz more after the first, as a parent you learn as you go and as with anything the more you learn the easier it gets. Now my kids are all older and the youngest is 7 and again I find myself relating to all of them different. The oldest is a teenager and dating so we are at the stage of doing everything together, the others are yonger and still need their special time as well but in a different way than their sister. Just love your children as much as you can and unonditionally and you will survive.
2006-11-05 03:52:45 · answer #1 · answered by Martha S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know exactly how you feel. I had my daughter at 17 and I was so busy trying to be responsible and showing everyone that I could finish high school, work part time have my own apartment and take care of a baby that it was stressing and left very little time for relaxing and just enjoying being a mommy. Then like you 7 years I have my son. Its so much different with him then it was with her. I'm now married and it seemed more socially right in the eyes of others. It is more relaxing with my son with then with Alexis, but that doesnt mean that I love her any less. Me and her will always have a bond that nothing will ever come in between. We kinda grew up together.
2006-11-05 09:05:34 · answer #2 · answered by kittykat 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ditto.for me ,sis.Though I would say that the experience of brining up the first child is a unique one with all the imperfection, fears and mistakes. The process of learning with the mistakes is upsetting but also enjoyable all the more because it is a novel experience. With the second child and that two after a long gap like yours the novelty has already worn off. However, the confidence gained from experience with the firs issue makes the bringing up rather easy and therefore more enjoyable. The joy is not marred by uncertainties as in the case of the first born.
A word of caution. If you repeat the feat I am afraid the experience would not be so enjoyable. What with bringing up the first two you may find brininging up the thired rather tiresome.So as they say in India We are Two. We have Two.
2006-11-05 09:05:05 · answer #3 · answered by Prabhakar G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have three, in a five year gap, and if you think you are relaxed with the second one wait til you have #3...laid back and having fun...lol !! The down side is I always feel a bit guilty knowing that my oldest is always breaking new ground and sometimes I am still that over protecting "new" Mom. We are just a year away from the ever popular "first date" and I am already getting nervous...and it's not that I don't trust my daughter...it's the boys I'm afraid of! (It doesn't help that I used to work with teenagers daily at a resturaunt and they told me all their secrets!!) I am afraid that she will date, and afraid that she won't. I'm afraid of her first heart break. I'm afraid of that car driving thing...and wondering how the heck I'll get her through college...and then I realize that by the time my youngest gets to do all those things I will be alot easier with it all. (Hopefully)
The funny thing about having three...they are all so different! So special in their own ways...I wouldn't trade them for the world. Not one moment, one kiss, one hug, a million diapers...not a single memory...lol !!!
2006-11-05 10:14:25 · answer #4 · answered by Barbiq 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
EVERY child is different. You are not just a more experienced mother, you are a more experienced person! You're 7 years older with more maturity.
I had two years between my kids, but I know if I were to have another, there are so many things that would be different. Even between those two, things were different. I followed the book with my first, but with my second, not so much--more instincts than anything.
2006-11-05 08:59:43 · answer #5 · answered by just browsin 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was at the opposite end of that spectrum. I love both my little girls completely, but I found that bounding and relaxing was easier with my older daughter. However, their was less stress in our daily routine with my youngest daughter 'cause I already knew what I was doing. I think for every parent each child is a little different in the way we relate and bound to them,but as long as you have unyielding love for both their is no shame in the approach difference.
2006-11-05 09:02:19 · answer #6 · answered by novelwyrm 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that the only difference between your first child and any children that you have after wards is that you are more experienced so you are not as worried about everything. The feelings that I had however were no different and I have 5 beautiful children
2006-11-05 15:54:23 · answer #7 · answered by juicie813 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I know exactly what you mean and mine are only two years apart. The second one is much easier and you'll find out the older they get the easier it gets because the second one entertains the youngest one. They have a playmate so it makes it a lot easier than the first one. I was definitely more at ease with my second one.
2006-11-05 09:01:46 · answer #8 · answered by tina 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I do feel more connected to my first born, because he is talking and walks around and he is 2, my daughter isn't crawling, but has said mama and dada. I can't wait till she starts walking and playing big girl with me. I never wanted a girl, but I'm so glad I did. baby to me are all work and no play. I had my children young because of my back problems, I really can't pick them up so having a baby is exhausting and painful for me. When she starts walking, it'll be more fun for all of us.
2006-11-05 09:39:30 · answer #9 · answered by fourcheeks4 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
each child is different....when i had my first i loved her to death and i was so excited the 2nd was a shock and i cried all the time...i had to learn to love her...i mean i loved her but it wasn't like the love i felt for the first...my girls are 5 years apart....you shouldn't feel bad or anything.....its just how u feel,,,thjat doesnt mean that you love one more than the other it just means that you are human and you have emotions
2006-11-05 14:55:31 · answer #10 · answered by PrInCeSs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋