Should I tell about abuse?

Question

I'm 14, I was sexually abused by my ex-step-father 3 years ago for about a year. It's really been eating me up inside for the past year, now that I'm past the denial, but I'm not sure if I should tell someone. I'm afraid it'll break up the family, and I'm really so ashamed of the abuse that I don't think I should. Could someone give me advice on what I should do?

Answer 1

Yes you need to tell your mother as soon as possible or someone you are comfortable talking to. A best friends mother, counselor, you doctor.

It was not your fault and you did not deserve to have this happen to you. It is important that you report this so this man cannot hurt others like yourself.

You can then start the healing process and have a better chance to have a happy healthy future.

I pray you find the courage to go forward....

Answer 2

Tell your family (or some other adult who you trust, such as a teacher) about it, tell the police and then seek some help dealing with the abuse. Psychologists and organizations for abuse victims can help you learn to deal with this experience. Don't be ashamed of telling about the abuse. You did nothing wrong, it was HIM who was wrong and did a horrible thing to you. Don't let it eat you up inside. Talk to your family, tell them the truth. It's a really hard step to take, but it's for the best that you take that step. It will help you deal with the problem and it will possibly prevent that he will do the same to someone else.

Answer 3

Don't YOU be ashamed of the abuse! It wasn't your fault!!! It's never too late to tell but be prepared that some people, especially family members who liked the fellow, might not believe you. If he's now out of the picture, it will be much easier to discuss it with your mother. I suggest going to someone other than her first..... Do you have another close woman friend, not a girlfriend, but someone with some authority? Teacher? Counsellor? Then you can approach your mom together and you have someone on your side who believes you.

You may be past the denial stage but now you have to deal with the anger. I strongly recommend first getting it off your chest and filing charges, then getting some counselling. I'm sending you some strength as you're going to need it! Take care and good luck..... :o)

Answer 4

It’s hard to deal with the past. I known three people through a few years who had the same thing happen to them. It brings a great anger to me how someone can be so selfish and inhuman to anyone, especially a child. Your ex-step father is a monster and is sick.
If you let this go, it will only eat you up inside.

This is serious, but there are a few ways you can stop this. If you feel that you can’t talk to anyone in your family, maybe you can set up some therapy and start there.
Check out these FAQ and hotline
http://www.stopitnow.com/comquest.html

http://www.darkness2light.org/GetHelp/national.asp?showstaticmenu=1

You are not the only one, and I am sorry this has happened. It must be hard to trust human beings.

I hope you make the right choice for yourself. And to stop him from doing it again!

Answer 5

properly - in case you do tell her, that's her criminal accountability to touch the community regulation enforcement and new child protective centers. as quickly as contacted, they'll come to the place you're at and take you and in all probability your brother (and the different infants interior the relatives). now and lower back rather of taking you to somebody outdoors of the relatives - they'll enable a relatives member shield you and arrest the accused individual(s). they'll then habit an analyze and have the court decide on what's interior the main suitable pastime of the youngsters. they many times will take your area on the entire subject and that they do positioned some inventory into what the youngsters say. With that being reported - i'd communicate on your mothers and fathers, and tell them that what they say and do hurts you and additionally you will like it in the event that they'd replace issues. attempt to paintings it out at domicile first. If that dosent paintings then definitly communicate on your counselor. you're able to no longer would desire to handle abuse - emotional or actual. look out for your self and your little bro. stable success!! wish this helps

Answer 6

If you live in a large city, call the police dept. and ask them if they have a victims service person and if they do, talk to her and tell her everything. My daughter works for a PD doing this and she helps abused girls every day. She will tell you what to do and how to do it and stay with you all the way. Please contact someone, a teacher, preacher, someone because you need counseling because you have nothing to be ashamed about. You were a child and a crime was committed against you. Would you be ashamed if you had been robbed or mugged? Its the same thing and you need to know that you did nothing wrong. Good luck sweetie and please get help.....

Answer 7

If telling how someone abused you breaks up the family, then so be it...if they love you,...and turn on YOU for telling, then they don't deserve you. I would go to the police, and see if they can help you catch him again..and then see what happens...you did nothing wrong..this makes me so sick...Please talk to a woman police officer, and tell her your concerns...you did nothing wrong, remember that..your sicko stepfather was sexually abusing you when you were ELEVEN??? I am appalled at his behaviour, and if your mom condones it she belongs in jail also...I am sorry, but YOU are the victim here, not them..please, tell the police asap. before he does it to someone else also....and I would NOT tell mom, because somehow, I think she already knows..

Answer 8

The practical answer for that would be to tell all about it to your mom. Mainly because anyone's mother reserves the right to know anything about her children especially matters like this. I am sure that your mother could resolve it while having less damage on your part. if you trust your mother, please do this, otherwise choose a trustworthy and responsible person whom you could confide this with. i hope that you'll be able to face your struggles with much courage and guidance from the almighty Being so that you could live your future with less remorse, regrets and resentments. With much sympathy... Mark

Answer 9

You need to tell someone. For yourself. If not your mother, than your doctor, and he'll have to keep it confidential. He can refer you to a therapist or counsellor, and you can get through this in the way that you need to. If you deny help, you'll end up in a world of hurt. You owe it to your LIFE to make something of it instead of becoming a victim of your past. Good Luck, and be strong!!

Answer 10

Tell your mother. It's not only for your sake but for anyone else this pervert can get at or is close to. None of it is your fault so just pluck up the courage and tell your mom what happened. You can both decide what to do from there.