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This isn't a personal thing, I just want to know the worlds opinion on such a touchy subject to some people.
When you give your answer please add detail, and a reason for your opinion.

2006-11-04 17:19:06 · 19 answers · asked by Manx 5 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

Thank You to everyone who has taken the time to answer my questions!

I think living with someone first is smarter than just jumping into such an important decision. I don't think it's wrong to live with someone before marriage, if your just gonna divorce a few years down the road then whats the big deal? Maybe you would have saved yourself some money if you had tried living with them first to see if you are compatible.

2006-11-04 17:33:18 · update #1

19 answers

I believe in it... its a test drive.

If you don like the car, don buy it!

2006-11-04 17:21:28 · answer #1 · answered by lolitakali 6 · 1 0

Well I am a christian so from any christian stand point the answer would have to be it is wrong. Not only immoral but also if you are following God and choice the one that is right with him, you have to trust that he will make you compatable. Now from a non-christian view ( because I know everyone isn't) I still think it is silly. My best friend from 6th grade actually moved in with her boyfriend. Now they are seperated and everything finacially is screwed up. They hardly know whos bills are whos. it is thrusting a relationship into family mode without any kind of commitment. This just seems dangerous. Think about all that married couples already have to work out. How can an unmarried couple living together be any better. Guys also find girls that they live with and aren't married to more often less attractive because they are trapped with them.Also you can spend enough time together and even nights without moving in and getting smoothered. It's a volatile situation and the break ups are nasty. If you don't believe you will break up get married. they have an 80% chance more to get divorced in the long run

2006-11-04 17:30:11 · answer #2 · answered by Kara C 1 · 0 0

Since the 60s, there have been all sorts of studies done on this topic, and as far as I can determine, there haven't been any definite conclusions that living together before marriage offers any lasting advantages over not. That is, a marriage that follows living together has no greater (or lesser) chance of success. However, I think that the woman is at a definite disadvantage when she agrees to "shack up". Why? Because she is the one that runs the risk of pregnancy. And, if there is no legally binding agreement, the guy can simply walk away from the whole thing (depends on the state you live in). My opinion: have a long engagement period living independently - at least a year, if not longer.

2006-11-04 17:27:21 · answer #3 · answered by SafetyDancer 5 · 0 0

I grew up in the seventies, and living together became the "thing to do". I did it, many of my friends did it. But it's really just an excuse to have sex without any of the committment that should really be there. Most couples (in general) who live together don't last very long a few years maybe. I did end up getting married, and did not live with my husband before marriage. I think it worked out much better for me.

2006-11-04 17:24:09 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Hi October, I think that is the best thing a couple could do. Test the water and see if everything works.This is a great way to see if you can live with this person, that you think you love.Most of all if things don't work out,you can grab your hat and move on.
The reason i feel like this is i was marry to a abuser and controller.The divorce was real nasty on his side. He lied like a dog to the judge,and made -up stories. This is why i feel like this. Never marry until you have lived and had sex with a man.

Clowmy

2006-11-04 17:31:08 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

At the risk of being labelled (old-fashioned) i'll say that I am against it, unless it is the first step before marriage. I still think that marriage is and should remain the cornerstone of society. The reason is because if children are born into marriage, they will get more love and attention. Now, if people are living together without marriage, they will not have the incentive to get married and have children

2006-11-04 17:32:03 · answer #6 · answered by seek_fulfill 4 · 0 0

I have been married twice. Both times I lived with my mates (5 months the first time & year & a half the second). Marriage number 1 lasted 6 years & number 2 lasted 1 year. So next NO I wont do it. No more testing for me.

2006-11-04 17:21:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

My opinion is that age and maturity are the main issues here. If you are under 30 and never married, then living together before marriage is not the best thing to do.

If you have already been married, or are at least 30, then living together before marriage makes sense.

2006-11-04 17:22:20 · answer #8 · answered by physandchemteach 7 · 0 0

It can be an INCREDIBLE eye opener!!! I recently ended a relationship after dating a girl for three years, and giving serious though to marrying her! We moved into the same space and it ALL went to heck in a hurry! My advice - if you're contemplating marriage, you ought to live w/ the person for a little while first, esp. if you have the slightest bit of doubt about marrying them. Living in the same house changes things completely, and it's better to find that out before the ceremony.

2006-11-04 17:23:51 · answer #9 · answered by Matt S 2 · 1 0

The point made by the authors is that, overall, the risk of divorce after living together is 80% higher than the risk of divorce after not living together, which is already too high. In other words, those who live together before marriage are almost twice as likely to divorce than those who did not live together. But they also point out that the risk of divorce is even higher if you don't live together more than three years prior to marriage. The longer you live together prior to marriage, the less the risk of divorce until after 8 years of living together, when the risk of divorce is equal to those who have not lived together.

2006-11-04 17:21:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I have lived with a few ladies,,, in my time,,,

My first wife was a virgin and we didn't live together,,,, that lasted 20 years,,,,

my second wife,, lived with her for 1 year before getting married,,, she set a time line one year married or out the door,,,, lasted 3 years we are still good friends and may give it another try

few others with no commitment,,,, 6 months to 2 years,,,,,

I kinda liked the virgin better,,,, are there any 54 year old virgins left out there?????

2006-11-04 17:26:39 · answer #11 · answered by S h 3 · 0 0

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