My sister is now 4 months pregnant which would be fine if she wasn't 14. Everytime I look at her I become angry with her because of what she did and it makes me nauseous I feel like she's not my little sister anymore. How can I overcome this?
2006-11-04 15:02:52 · 9 answers · asked by ♥mizfit♥ 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
imagine if you made a mistake like that.
if you were 14, was suddenly in the moment, and suddenly YOUR sister made you feel like a criminal. imagine if your FAMILY was all on your side, but that one person wasn't. imagine how much WORSE that would make you feel.
she probably KNOWS that she's made a mistake. but hey..you can't turn back time. so quit being so hard on her, and accept the facts. she's young, and young ppl can be stupid. just be there for her, and maybe help HER feel better about all of this...by maybe picking out some baby names. buy some baby clothes. help her get EXCITED about having the baby, no matter what the circumstances are. but just make sure she knows...abortion is wrong. adoption is better. ♥gl
2006-11-04 15:09:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You are upset because you thought she was smarter than that. And you are wanting to know why did she do this? and why didn't she do that? The bottom line is, you need to forgive her. It might be easier to just be mad at the guy.
I'm sure she didn't plan to get pregnant. She's young, she might have known better, but when your hormones are running strong, sometimes you think that it will be OK this one time.
Right now she needs you more than ever. She knows what you think and what other people think. I'm sure she is scared of what is going to happen next, giving birth, raising a baby, her future, her life, the baby's future the baby's life, all of that.
If she is going to keep the baby she will need help and morale support from you and the rest of your family. If she is looking to adopt the baby out, try Bethany Adoptions, they do open adoptions and let the mothers choose the family their babies go to. Your sister needs options and she needs to know you will still love her no matter what. Little sisters always care what their big sisters think.
One of my friends just adopted her second baby from Bethany. The girl who gave birth to her new little boy was also 14. That little baby is making my friend and her husband VERY VERY happy. The 14 year old is still allowed to visit the baby, and my friends send pictures of the little boy to the girl's parents so they can still feel involved in the child's life.
2006-11-04 23:21:27 · answer #2 · answered by Dawn J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's understandable that you'd feel that way. But try not to be mad at her, she knows what she did wrong. The best thing you could do is say, "You may be pregnant now, but either way, you're still my little sister and I want you to know that I'm here for you." Being there for her is the best thing of all, not only will she feel good (because she's probably lost some friends b/c of the pregnancy) but she will also look up to you because of you taking a brave stand in such a time like this.
Talk to her and help her out. Write down how you feel-writing will help you express your feelings, you don't gotta be the best writer. Draw how you feel if you like to draw.
Whatever you do, be there for her and love her-even if she did make a big mistake that is hard for everybody around her besides her.
2006-11-04 23:24:25 · answer #3 · answered by sweetdollツ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it sounds corny when people suggest this, but write down everything you're feeling - why you're angry with her, what you wish she had done, what your fear about the situation is, what will change, how will it impact your life, etc.
It won't solve your anger but it does help to see it on paper, rather than just thoughts bottled up in your mind. Getting over your anger at her is going to take a long time and a lot of patience. This is a huge change in your life and seeing your sister in that position is more than difficult, so take it slowly.
If you can, try to get in contact with a psychologist - just to have someone to talk to and who can listen to everything you're feeling. If you can't do this, try talking to your parents about what's going on and what you're thinking. Also, if you don't feel comfortable talking to your parents, try phoning a relative you trust and talking to them instead.
I think, in general, you should find a person you can release your feelings to so you're not dealing with this on your own. It might help to have someone on your side when you're trying to come to terms with what's happened.
2006-11-04 23:17:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
being pregnant at that age is probably the worst thing that can happen to you. Her whole childhood is being taken away from her, and she will never get to expirience life the way most teenagers do. she is already dealing with too much pain, and the last thing she needs is for you to be angry with her. you have to just hold back your anger and think about her. put yourself in her shoes. afterall, sisters are supposed to ALWAYS be there for eachother through thick and thin. just remeber that
2006-11-05 00:08:01 · answer #5 · answered by spicyangel8 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a friend whose cousins all got pregnant before the age of 17. One got pregnant at 13. Maybe you could talk to her and ask her how she feels about it. Also try to put yourself in her shoes. Getting excited about the new addition to the family (your neice) might also help.
2006-11-04 23:05:56 · answer #6 · answered by Kaity 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless you want to spend the next 70+ years angry be her friend.
She's going to need a friend now more then even. No matter how tough she may be acting she's scared to death.
Also the baby is going to need an aunt...that's you.
2006-11-04 23:28:38 · answer #7 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please be supportive of her she will TRULY appreciate your love. That's all I can say. Please find it within yourself to let this one pass.
I'm sure she knows how you feel. I am sure she is scared too.
2006-11-05 00:15:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
be there for her, she needs your help and support
2006-11-04 23:16:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋