Some tips for being a pallbearer?

Question

I'm going to be a pallbearer for my grandma's funeral next week, along with four of the eldest grandsons and the eldest granddaughter. What are some tips about duties/responsibilities, what to wear, etc?

Answer 1

Very sorry to hear of your loss , a funeral director will be there to instruct you what to do and when , it doesn't take long . Just wear a suit or whatever clothes you normally have available there are no set rules or duties but to follow the funeral directors instruction on when to lift and carry that all there is to it . Good luck to you , you'll do fine , god bless !

Answer 2

Pallbearer Etiquette

Answer 3

This Site Might Help You.

RE:
Some tips for being a pallbearer?
I'm going to be a pallbearer for my grandma's funeral next week, along with four of the eldest grandsons and the eldest granddaughter. What are some tips about duties/responsibilities, what to wear, etc?

Answer 4

Don't worry, the funeral director will tell you exactly what to do, and will probably ask if any of you have served as pallbearers before. He will show you how, and when and where to carry the casket, and how to slide it into the hearse.There is usually a place for them to sit, reserved cards, so you do not have to step over people, and can get up out of your seat quietly, and repectfully, to file around the casket. Some funeral directors ask you to step away so the casket can be closed, others allow the bearers to witness this. At my friend's father's funeral, they stood in front the casket, while it was being closed, I guess to shield the family from having to watch, and to bear witness. Usually there is a car provided for them, again so they can be near the head of the line of cars going to the cemetery, usually the car after the chief mourners limo, and can move quietly from the car to the hearse. Usually, the funeral director stands to the side at the funeral, and motions by a nod when it is time for your duties.
Wear a dark suit, the ladies should wear something dark,preferably black, too.
A black suit is appropriate, maybe if you don't own one or can't afford to buy, try to borrow. You do not have to coordinate clothes, but it would be nice not to clash too much. A sober tie and a white shirt.and shirt. The girls should try to wear black, hair and makeup are subdued, and a pair of very sensible shoes so they can carry the casket without falling, they can bring a pair of heels for the wake.
Behavior is as you might expect. Your duties are carried out silently. Sometimes the bearers stand by at the rites at the grave, or stand at the back of the casket, sometimes they sit. Most stand as still as is possible, heads down, hands clasped together, or watch the rite. After the funeral, it is expected you watch the crowd, and offer help or support for elderly or infirm, and you should attend the wake, or dinner at the church, whatever follows.
I've seen pallbearers stand guard over the casket at the funeral, but that is rare.
There was a wheeled carrier at the funeral home for my father, no one had to actually carry.
My sympathy to you on the death of your Grandma.

Answer 5

What Is A Pallbearer

Answer 6

I'm sorry about the loss of your grandma. Talk to your parents, aunts and uncles to see if your grandma had any special wishes, or if all of the bearers will be wearing similar colours, etc. Often pall bearers are given special corsages and either sit at the front of the church on the opposite side of the church from the family or right behind the immediate family. Depending on how old you and your cousins are, you may be sitting together with your parents at the front of the church.

You will 'bear' your grandma more than once-from the hearse to the church/hall (if the funeral isn't at the funeral home), from the church/hall/funeral chapel to the hearse and from the hearse to the burial site. The funeral director will understand that none of you have done this before, and should give you directions about how to make the task easier. If it's a snowy, cold day, make sure you have non-slip shoes or boots on.

Don't be surprised if your grandma feels heavier than you'd expect; remember you are carrying the casket as well as your grandma's body.

The link below will give you the other basics.

Answer 7

A suit would be nice. Check with the others to see what they are wearing. Coordinate colors. I'm sorry for your loss. If you were close or not , remember she was part of your family and should be treated with respect. Talk to family members about her, and what they want to happen. Don't get trapped in "who she liked best syndrome." At this point it doesn't matter. Remember her in a good way, if you can, and know you were asked to carry a member of your family to their final resting place. Try to think of it as an honor. I hope this helps. Once again, very sorry for your loss.

Answer 8

I honour your intentions and hope you are as strong as your wishes to be a pallbearer. I well remember my mother's funeral and as much as I would have wanted to be a pallbearer, I didn't feel up to it. This task was left to the firm of undertakers.
You will be required to dress soberly. Black morning (mourning?) suit, not necessarily with tails, would be the order of the day. I would suggest having a word with the funeral directors about this, as they will be sympathetic to your wishes, not because it might save them the cost, but they have to be seen to be honouring the wishes of the berieved.
Please accept my condolences in your loss. The links below may give you some guidance.

Answer 9

I have done it and i wore a suit and tie and followed the instructions of the funeral home employees