my bf has been smoking weed for a very long tyme like 2-3 years. When I said he smokes I mean he do it like it's part of his life. He do it daily! That is why it breaks my heart seeing him hurting his health. About last month he decided to quit. He showed lots of improvements. Back then when he said he will quit he quits for a few days than back again. it's always disappointment. But after this time I am very happy But again lately he started again. He did it couple times last week and he did it again 2night. I asked him why. He said it's his day off and he is bored and stress. But that is not a good reason to start again. Reason I care for him so much is becuase we both talk about our future. HOw we want to be together (get marry) That's why I am so against it. I dont wnat to see anything happen to him in the future. He said he won't quit but will do it once in a blue moon
am I taking it such a big deal? Do you guys have any past experience on how to quit?
thanx
2006-11-04 11:21:30 · 31 answers · asked by ceci 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My advice - get rid of that loser. He obviously doesn't mean to follow through with his promises. He must not be very interesting, either, if he has nothing better to do than smoke weed because he's bored.
2006-11-04 11:24:42 · answer #1 · answered by Sam 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Its better to stop it abruptly. I did it when I was in year 9. I started at year 7 and doing it 3 times a day. It will take a lot of care, love and support from the people around him. Try discovering some sports or hobbies that may be of interest to him. (fingers crossed) If there will be a new hobby that he will be busy with, hopefully, he will stop/forget smoking weed.
Give hime the support and love he needed but give him the ultimatum also. Do this in a very compassionate but firm tone.
Hope this helps.
2006-11-04 11:29:30 · answer #2 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally, I don't care what people do in their spare time, as long as it doesn't affect me. I personally don't smoke weed, though.
But here's the thing. It DOES bother you. Obviously, it's harming him in some way, and you care about him. HOWEVER, he will only quit if he wants to, and he'll only quit when he's ready to quit. Trying to reason with him and trying to get him to quit will not work.
Think ahead to your future. If you are against weed (for whatever reason - it smells, health effects, illegality, whatever), just think about your future with him if you stay with him HOPING that he will quit. He probably won't, it'll cause endless fights, he'll resent you, and it won't last. Take some time away from him, meet new people. Date new people. He'll make the choice to quit if he wants to. And if he does for good, then maybe you have a shot with him. If not, there are plenty of fish in the sea that are more in tune to your lifestyle.
2006-11-04 11:30:47 · answer #3 · answered by AnswerMom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out as soon as you can!!!! You cannot change a person. At this point you are co-dependent and the routine will not stop.
The drama is very addictive for co-dependents and there is a great possibility that you will take the drama into the next relationship. And yes, there will be another relationship. Don't fool yourself just because you want to get married.
I suggest you get counseling because you are trying to control someone.
The above was said not out of meanness but reality.
2006-11-04 11:27:10 · answer #4 · answered by Laughing Libra 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I had a girlfriend that smoked alot we ended up braking up over it as we argued so much about it.. I don't understand why people feel the need to smoke all the time, but it is a big deal if it bothers you. If he cares about you and the relationship he will stop. Otherwise rethink where the relationship is going
2006-11-04 11:26:52 · answer #5 · answered by jetli1333 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you need to ask him if smoking weed is more important than you and tell him that you are not happy with it and you love him but you would love him even more if he would quit. because if he dont stop now it will be harder for him to stop it in the future and if you dont put your foot down right now and tell him how you feel he might never take you serious about it and keep doing it. but i hope you the best with everything!
2006-11-04 11:29:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ceci, look at what you just wrote. There are bunches of ways to quit but you said bf won't quit.
He is a loser and will not change. You need to decide if you are going to hang your star on a loser or get a life.
Good Luck
2006-11-04 11:25:22 · answer #7 · answered by snvffy 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First off... why do you want him to quit when you knew how he was when you got with him?? Secondly, if it calms him down and he's not hurting anybody else by doing, and is still responsible... then what is it hurting? At least he's not an alcoholic getting behind the wheel... weed really has no bad effects on you except for mellowing you out.. alcohol on the other hand impaires your vision and intervenes with your judgement... Good Luck
2006-11-04 11:28:19 · answer #8 · answered by lil_adidas_gurl 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Yes it is a big deal. Good Luck getting him to quit. I do have past experience, my husband did. He quit way before we got married though. Just tell him that you think he needs to quit.
2006-11-04 11:25:07 · answer #9 · answered by Happy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My x-husband also abuses marijuana. Then he abused me.
You are getting a pretty clear red flag. He can never give it up without professional help. Everyday he is using, he is killing his brain cells, his sperm count and lessening your chances of having a healthy baby with him.
It is time for you to leave. Find yourself a healthy man. As time goes by you will see that you are better off without him.
2006-11-04 11:27:16 · answer #10 · answered by mar 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋