How can i improve my poor self-esteem?

Question

any tips would be helpful~

Answer 1

wow that really reminds of me of last year...
i'm currently in 8th grade, 13-years old, and i live in Southern CA.
But I moved here about 3 years ago, and the first two years of my new middle school were torture.
I had TREMENDOUSLY low self-esteem, and I know that because I was so deeply affected by it.
I was afriad to look a guy in the eye in case he thought i was really ugly
I was afraid to talk to a "popular" or "semi-popular" girl in case they insulted me or spread rumors about me since i was so "ugly" (or so i thought)
when i looked in the mirror, i saw only flaws
Whenever I tried talking to guys, I would freeze up and I would look somewhere else, and they would always go, "are you okay?" which was really embarassing.
It was HORRIBLE.
I felt like I was worthless, ugly as a troll, and that everybody hated me. Basically, i was paranoid AND lacking self-confidence.

But this year, i dunno, maybe it was because i left the peak of puberty or something, but i'm feeling a lot more social, happy, and self-confident than i was last year.
i can look deeply into a guys' eyes w/o thinking he thinks i'm ugly
i accept myself for who i am
i LIKE myself for who i am, and I know other people do too
i have a LOT mroe friends than last year, mostly because i'm more talkative and less like the "wallpaper" I was last year.

i think what hapenned was that i got over the stress of moving to a new school.
do you experience a lot of stress?
if so, that could be the cause of your low self-esteem..

I posted a question similar to yours in that "low" time I had last year, and the answers I received were great.
one of the best that i think helped me get my act together were to:
*dont be envious about other people's looks. look for what people might envy in YOU.
(look in the mirror. ignore the flaws, they're nothing. focus in on the good parts of your face, your body, your personality! nobody is perfect, nobody is worthless)
*be yourself. don't try to be someone you're not, because sooner or later, people are gonna see you for who you truly are
*smile. a LOT. you don't have to scream and giggle with someone to be social! whenever you pass someone in the halls or something and you catch their eye, smile a big wide smile. people will eventually begin to understand that you are a good person, you are approachable
*keep yourself healthy and clean. people tend to shove mounds of junk food into their faces when they have low self-esteem, just to make themselves feel better, and sometimes people don't even bother with hygiene because they think they're worthless anyway. when you're NOT. shower every day and wash your hair every other day. eat healthy, excercise. get a friend to jog with you.
*when people compliment something you are wearing or have, etc, don't say "naw, i got this from my grandma, it's really ugly" and try to fight the compliment when the person is trying to flatter you. that's what i used to do. when people compliment you, smile and say "thank you"
*wear cute clothes. even though clothing or appearances don't really, really matter in life, wearing clothes that you are proud of is always a good self-esteem bumper. just don't go for the "wrong" kind of cute or flirty.
*make a few friends that you can talk to about ANYTHING. you can pour your heart out.

i really hope this helps, and good luck!
alyssa skye

Answer 2

You can improve self esteem by doing the things that you think are right for you. Find out what you believe, what you like and do those things. Do the things that make you feel good about yourself and don't do anything that feels wrong because someone else thinks you should. You have to listen to your body, your stomach, bowels and head will let you know when you are doing something that is wrong for you.

Answer 3

I would want to know a bit more of your background before I presume to say too much, but I can offer a few things.

Ways of thinking are as much a habit as anything else. So a person who keeps putting himself down is going to believe it, no matter what.

What you might want to do is make a list of the things you like about yourself, the things you're good at. Make sure to leave this list where you will see it a lot.

Start surrounding yourself with positive things. Some people find that cleaning and organizing their houses gives them the control they need to organize and take control of their lives. Other people like gardening: The thought of little plants growing because of them is really quite enjoyable. And still others find exercise useful because it encourages the body to rev up and actually feel good.

This isn't much, I know. But it's a start.

Good luck!

Answer 4

Honey remember you are the most important person in the world, coz its YOU. Never Judge urslef by how you look and how you perform rather become a person who is in peace with self. Simply means trusting ur ownself and doing good deeds.

Read the book called "See you on the Top" and paulo Cohelos "Alchemist"

Answer 5

We all have what we call negative talk that we hear in our minds. You have to learn to replace the negative talk with positive talk. When you catch your self thinking negative thoughts. Find positive things abut your self to replace them with. Such as I have really pretty hair. I am a good friend. I have a lot of positive things things I can draw on.Write down on the good things about yourself and place then where you can read then when you are feeling negative about your self

Answer 6

Woozy: the only way to improve self-esteem is this
you must control that just by seeing an sychologist they
are very best doctors whom will help mental paients as following
requirements because I know how to control myself-esteem
which is now alot better http://yahoo.familysychologist.com

Answer 7

expensive sufferer, It seems such as you're very harm over a topic and that i could be incorrect and need i'm, yet to reply to your question the two have no longer something especially courting and little or no customarily courting. that would sound complicated yet i will interrupt it down so as which you will see that i'm no longer attempting to demean your question. First that's an exceedingly stable question and thank you for asking it in this internet site. In a gay courting or way of existence as i like to call it there is no longer something that shows rather that the detrimental self-worth is asserted or on the subject remember of being gay. added interior the popular sense of detrimental self-worth being interior the gay way of existence there is a few yet no longer very plenty, that's taken way out of context. all of us have detrimental self-worth at countless and distinctive cases in our lives and that's what we choose for to do with it that makes us the greater desirable individual. So in a popular sense it has in basic terms a small area interior the gay way of existence and with any luck as we as gay human beings come to settle for ourselves for who and what we are we are able to have much less and much less detrimental shallowness approximately ourselves. i'm hoping this solutions your question rather. stable success and would God Bless!

Answer 8

I want you to know this,...

Everyone has something about themselves that they are not happy with... nobody is made perfect, if they look perfect, it probably cost them alot of money!!!
Now its important to get to know yourself .. not to compare yourself to others...
except who you are and be proud of yourself

I believe that today's society they put to much into how a person should look..
I read cosmopolitan, and did you know that in some issues it shows the stars caught out with no makeup...LOL they look pretty bad without being all made up and all that make up.. no different than anyone else in this world , so chin up sweetie, I bet your a lovely person with with alot going for you

Answer 9

Volunteer work has helped a lot of people who have this problem. Also, doing something extra nice for yourself once in awhile is good to do. I hope you're feeling better soon...you deserve to be happy!!

Answer 10

You have to spend some time talking yourself into it. Then you have to believe it. If other people talked to into your poor sel-esteem, spend some time ignoring them.