Atheists - what do you do with yourself when you're in a "group prayer" situation?

Question

I usually am silent. Think song lyrics in my head. I look around for kids who might be "peeking" so I can wink at them. How about you?

Shane: BE HONEST - would you join in a prayer for something you didn't believe in? Join in for a joint "talk with Santa" or "lets ask Allah"?

And I don't distract the kids from anything! They're looking around because they're already bored. It's not like I yank their devout little heads up and wink at them :P

Answer 1

I bow my head in respect for others, and list all the things for which I am thankful.

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Answer 2

I stay silent and don't bow or close my eyes as to me that has always seemed a bit hypocritical. But I believe one should show respect for others beliefs if you have agreed to socialize with those same people otherwise. And they also should respect your right not to have to pretend to agree with them in the religious area.

However, I wouldn't wink at others who have their eyes open. For all you know they are checking you out to see if you are in fact disrespectful. Most likely there are more other non-believers in these sessions with their eyes closed than not. And they could be right in choosing to close their eyes purely out of respect.

Answer 3

I have to leave the group as if I need the loo or something...I just find it too hard to stay. I get this sort of nervous laugh and KNOW I need to get out straight away because laughing would be soo disrespectful. It's just a nervous thing with me!

Answer 4

If you an Atheist than why are you involved in a group prayer situation? Excuse yourself and leave the room.

Answer 5

I have yet to be in a group prayer situation. As far as those "moment of silence" situations, I raise my eyebrows and smile at anyone who notices that I haven't got my head down.

Answer 6

a million) for my area, i haven't been in a topic as complicated as yours with the aid of fact entering atheism / skepticism, apart from my grandmother passing. in spite of the incontrovertible fact that, as mean as this would sounds, I regarded forward to her passing. She became a solid lady in her existence, yet with the aid of onset of extreme diabetes, coronary heart ailment, Alzheimer's, and her very own grief over the lose of her daughter, her ideas and physique have been devastated. She became no longer the lady she was once. What made up my grandmother became long previous years earlier her physique gave up the ghost. I discovered plenty from that have, in spite of the incontrovertible fact that it became at no factor person-friendly. to administration, i'd routinely in basic terms sit down and picture. a great style of complicated questioning. understanding what became happening alleviated my helplessness. 2) you could pray all you desire, yet once you recognize it may no longer paintings, then why attempt. yet whilst it helps you, choose for it. 3) that's particularly helpful to objective meditation rather of prayer. yet regardless of you do, gain this sparsely. stable success, and remember that administration is an phantasm. you could in basic terms administration your very own self. attempting to administration a topic or persons will reason you undue tension.

Answer 7

I deal with this all the time at holidays, at least during those holiday gatherings where it's not at my house. I don't allow "group prayer" at my house. Private, personal prayer, but not "group prayer" where I have to join in. You can pray, but leave me out of it.

But I can't always do that, especially at Christmas. I'm usually safe at Thanksgiving, but my uncle's a minister and can't get away right at Christmas. So usually we either go to his place or of that doesn't work, we have Christmas here and then they come here closer to NewYear's.

Whenever I go to my uncle's, of course, him being a minister and his wife being insanely devout(I like to think of her as akin to Mrs. Lovejoy from the Simpsons, only way b*tchier), there's prayer at meals. There's always prayer before meals(at least lunch and dinner, I can't say I've seen a breakfast prayer, oddly enough) and especially holiday meals where my uncle leads the prayer.

It's their house and I'm fine with that. They have the right to do group prayers, just like I have the right to restrict prayer to the individual at my house. So I deal with sitting in group prayer situations at least once a year and what I do is just close my eyes and sit quietly. Prayers last less than thirty seconds, sometimes closer to a minute for holiday meals, but I don't really care. I don't join in, I just sit quietly, and leave it at that.

My aunt actually tried to make an issue of that once, writing me to say I "didn't respect her" in her home because I didn't pray at meals. That's complete b.s. and I told her as such as I can think of lots of things I could've done to "disrespect her". I could have eaten, I could have started banging my silverware on my plate, sang an obscene song about sex with turkeys, lots of things. At least I sat quietly while they prayed and waited to dig in when they did.

For the record, I didn't change what I did to appease her. I used to, as a teenager when I started to doubt my beliefs, join in on prayer anyways, mostly because I didn't know what to do. I didn't have the option of not going and I figured that I'd avoid trouble by just "keeping up appearances". It didn't work. I felt like such a sellout, so I quit and just remained silent during services and table prayers. Nobody else makes an issue of it as I'm being respectful and quiet while they pray, so that's what I do.

My aunt's the only one who makes an issue of it and frankly, she's a control freak with bigger issues than I have, so she doesn't count. Until I get the whole family up in arms about me remaining quiet in my seat, I don't plan to do it any differently. They can pray, I can avoid praying to something I don't believe in, and everybody wins.

Answer 8

How come you dont join in the prayer? Dont distrct the children who are trying to pray by winking at them.

Answer 9

I bow my head and think good thoughts, out of respect for those around me.

Answer 10

I leave before I start to laugh or I try to count tiles on the ceiling.