His son moved in after his daughter moved out with her entire family. There seems to be boundary issues with these adult kids. They move in with their dad, then move out then another one moves in and then they move out. They cannot seem to get out on their own, not even after they marry and have their own families. I am not sure who is more to blame, the dad for making them comfortable enough to keep moving in or the kids for not being able to get it together.
I have noticed, it is noon, and they have not even packed their belongings. They probably would like to get in that last 1 hour long shower before they pay their own water bill, and enjoy the 78 degree thermostat and use the last jug of laundry detergent before they leave. After all, there is no place like home.
Should I send them a housewarming gift or save it till they move back in in 6 months with their new baby.
My boyfriend confided in me he cannot wait for them to hit the road. He is anxious for them to get out.
2006-11-04 04:56:27 · 6 answers · asked by happydawg 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Your boyfriend is to blame for allowing his kids to do this. It's fine to help your children when they need it, but they need help constantly because he allows them to. They need to learn to make it on their own.
When they come back again, which they probably will, make sure you tell them they will be paying half of the utilities and that you want a deposit up front.
2006-11-04 05:12:26 · answer #1 · answered by Michelle *The Truth Hurts 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you should save the housewarming gift. Instead offer to babysit the new baby (when it gets here) or buy some sort of baby item to help make their life easier (diapers, formula, etc.). In the meantime I would try to make your home a lot less accessable to your boyfriend's kids. Redo the bedrooms so they aren't bedrooms (office, entertainment room, put in a hot tub - anything!). Take back the space they have been using all this time as your own. If one does happen to move in, make it a lot less comfortable. Turn off the cable, hide the laundry detergent, turn down the thermostat (on both the furnace and the water heater), charge rent - make it a lot less homey and welcoming to them!!! As for your boyfriend, you need to build him up and make sure that next time one calls wanting a place to stay that the answer is no. Tell him they are grown adults, and you deserve a life without them mooching off of you - period. Find other resources they can mooch off of (government housing, food stamps, things like that) so when they call you have a few handy suggestions. It might take some time, but eventually you might see some results. Good luck!!!
2006-11-04 05:15:24 · answer #2 · answered by Michaela 4120 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The doctor took an X-ray? Why would he do that? I can't imagine a doctor taking an X-ray of an adolescent girl's belly, on the outside chance that she might be pregnant, which could potentially harm the fetus. Or did you mean an ultrasound? Even so.... What advice would you like? You raised your kids to think premarital sex was OK, and a 12 year old's brain isn't capable of making rational decisions or evaluating consequences. You don't argue with a 12 year old anyway. You need some professional family counseling to help you figure out who's in charge.
2016-05-21 23:14:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How do you deal with it? I would make it very clear that if another "child" moves it, I move out. Your boyfriend needs to get a backbone and learn some tough love, otherwise these children will continue to use him and his kindness. Show them the door and give them the boot.
2006-11-04 05:04:27 · answer #4 · answered by Hallon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dearie, you need to get your priorities in order. If you care to have a life of your own, tell em to make this departure final. Can your boyfriend be that special that you put up with this nonsense? Is it possible that you secretly thrive on disarray and turmoil? If not, kick em all out, bf included..........
2006-11-04 05:03:13 · answer #5 · answered by Paco 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's obvious he loves them alot but the dad need to set boundaries for his kids. They will always feel dad will "bail" them out. By him keep helping them they will keep making poor decisions. Plus his kids are in relationships, they dont need to be in his house disturbing his.
2006-11-04 05:05:59 · answer #6 · answered by Got Curves? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋