What should I do?

Question

I've been seeing this girl for about a year. When our relationship started she was married. I know that some of thar responsibility is mine. All I will say in my defense is that I honestly tried to get her to work it out well before I acknowledged my feelings for her. They'd been together for ten years. Then I tried to get her to take a year to deal with the separation. She didn't want that, and we let our emotions prevail. I try to be very open minded, but i've never been the type to take relationships lightly. I've never been the reason for a break up before this, but I do feel like i've been that transition guy more than once. Now she is wanting to do some "things" she feels she missed out on in her younger years. She has this friend she 's been texting. She swears there's no attraction. But last night, while we were out she texted him that she would be "over" today. And there she is. Not alone, but with him nonetheless. Her actions this year make me believe she loves me. But this!!

Answer 1

I am going to be honest with you. It sounds like you were the transition guy because she needed a reason to leave her marriage. I wouldn't blame you for being the reason, but with this type of relationship you have to expect that things won't come out good in the end.

Just think about it, she left her marriage of ten years for you. If she did it to the first guy, she will do it to you. You say she says there are some "things" she wants to do that she missed out on in her early years. She is basically telling you she is going to cheat on you in a rather nice and polite way.

I don't doubt that she loves you, but it is probably not for the same reason you love her. She loves you because you were a reason for her to leave a long drawn out marriage she didn't want to be in.

Now there is a new guy. So basically you were the transition guy. But hey! Think of it like this, you helped someone get out of a situation they didn't want to be in. Talk to her about the relationship and where ya'll stand. Ask her where she see's YA'LL (you and her) in the next 5 years. If she doesn't include You in her plans then move on and get away.

You seem very sweet so it shouldn't be hard for you to find someone new, but take time to yourself and figure out what you really want. Maybe next time you will have be getting engaged and then married.

I'll pray for your situation though.

God Bless,
Princess

PS if you need someone to talk to hit me up @ [e-mail]

Answer 2

Maybe she does love you maybe she really just missed out on alot that she wants to make up for. You know that better than I do your with her. You have to decide if you want to go through all of this or if you think you can find happiness somewhere else

Answer 3

I would just tell her that you are going to give her space to figure out what she wants. After being married that long she may just need time to adjust and not be in a exclusive relationship.

Answer 4

she is mixed up and even though she probably is aware of what she has done to you, she probably thinks you will just deal with it. i would stay away and learn from this...you sound sensible enough so i hope you can get through it. good luck x

Answer 5

if she lives with you , i would kick her out and tell her to make dam sure that she is ready to committ and if she just wants to have her cake and eat it too then send her on her wa...be up front about it and get on with your lif, there are women out herer that dont't put up with that crap and neither should men

Answer 6

sounds like you got her on the reboundand she isn't done playing the feil yet.

Answer 7

your her rebound sorry