My husband and I are helping out my parents. So we are living here at the moment. I have a 19 year old younger sister. On halloween my mother and I took my 3 yr old out trick or treating and she got a TON of candy. When everyone else was asleep, my younger sister had her friends raid my daughter's halloween candy.
WHen I woke up in the morning, I saw she had literally 5 pieces of candy left and went ballistic. This is NOT the first time she has stolen from other family memebers, but it IS the first time she's taken anything from her neice. Any ideas on HOW I should teach her a lesson? I don't want to fight fire with fire, but this, in my opinion, is one of the lowest things you can do. Stealing candy from a kid.
2006-11-04 00:19:54 · 18 answers · asked by Mom of 2 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
First off, since it is your 3 year old, replace the candy at once and take your sister along (this prevents your sister from delaying purchasing it on her own and making it worse for your daughter). Your sister needs to cough up the dough to buy it. Your 3-year-old won't understand any lengthy delay.
She then needs to apologize to your daughter. 3-year-olds WILL understand doing wrong and the need to forgive. It will be a good lesson.
Next, your younger sister and parents need to take responsibility for their own lives. Why are you "helping" so much? You are ENABLING their behavior, not really loving. Why is a 19-year-old sister (and parents) living with you ? If she isn't going to college she needs to get out, now. She needs to FIND A JOB AND STOP MOOCHING OFF OF YOU.
I'll bet someone in your immediate family is feeling a little neglected. Try asking your husband. So you need to seriously think about how "big of a heart" you have. Take out a piece of paper and draw you, your husband, and your children in it. Circle that. That is what you need to take care of, and set up boundaries that no one can cross. Take care of your own family first. Leave the rest up to God.
If your parents haven't raised their 19-year-old daughter to be responsible, not steal, treat people with disrespect, you shouldn't be the one to parent her. Kick her out of the house. Maybe your parents will go too.
2006-11-04 00:42:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
The very least she can do is replace the candy. then she needs to grow up. Taking things is stealing...it doesn't matter if it's from your family or not. And taking Halloween candy is childish.
Part of me wants to suggest that you "raid" your sister's room once a day when she is gone and take something...see how long before she notices that it's gone and what she does...how she feels....I think I would start with small things and keep it up until I'd made her good and crazy... That might get the point across.
the other part of me wants you to take the kids to a friends house for a few hours and then your family has a show down with the sister...parents, husband, you & your sister...and get all the rules for living peacefully reviewed and agreed upon. Good luck!
2006-11-04 00:37:02 · answer #2 · answered by Barbiq 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm sorry. That stinks.
First Auntie needs to replace what she took.
Second, you and mom and dad need to have a chat. a) No cash in the house. b)Lock up anything she may find attractive to steal. c) No one gives her money.
Your sister needs to find a job. She has way too much free time on her hands and cannot use the time constructively. She should be maintaining her living space independently and should be doing her own laundry. You and mom and dad agree to this.
Then have conversation with her. You and mom and dad and sister sit around the table and read from notes. Tell her all the good things you know about her. (Did well in History, sews nicely, is kind to small animals, whatever you see.) Tell her the stealing has to stop and that you guys expect to see better decision making from her in the future. Let her know you expect her to have a resume done in the near future. Take her to Your State Department of Labor and help her find the job openings and show her how to send her resume. She can make copies and fax it from there for free if she needs to. She needs to be working full time. She needs to have a plan for transportion so her employer is sure she can get there every day. Help her find her path towards independence.
2006-11-04 00:48:03 · answer #3 · answered by Sunbaby 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
A 19 year old is far too old to be "stealing" candy. How mature is she? She should be made to apologize and replace the candy. However, you need to be careful about the "sharing" issue. In the future perhaps you could designate candy that is shared versus candy that is not. This is a tough lesson, especially for the 3 year old, because she should be sharing. It is unfortunate that the "adult" child took advantage of the situation.
2006-11-04 00:33:04 · answer #4 · answered by bampoo 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
What a brat!!!!! She is old enough to know better than to do that. You need to confront her and make her feel guilty. Perhaps if you let her know that your daughter was really upset that after all her hard work trick-or-treating, she has practically no candy. I think that if your sister has any heart at all, you can make her feel really guilty. Heck, get your daughter to say something to her. Maybe that will double the guilt.
Either way, she needs to replace the candy. I am a dental assistant, so I know first hand about the dangers of sugar, but geez, it is for Halloween. As long as she brushes really good after she eats the candy, it isn't going to kill her or rot her teeth.
2006-11-04 01:34:48 · answer #5 · answered by LittleMermaid 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's a blessing that the candy is gone. A 3 year old does not need TONS of candy, ask any dentist or pediatrician.
As for taking things that don't belong to her, have a sit down with your sister and tell her to knock it off. Ask your parents to talk to her also.
Many Kimkins diet member share that Halloween candy is their worst temptation for dieting and that having tons of candy when they were kids encouraged them being overweight.
2006-11-04 02:12:20 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the two get a depended on and stable individual to take a seat with the cat at an analogous time as you bypass out trick or treating, or have the important different stay domicile with the cat. do no longer enable the cat outdoors for any reason (you in all probability does no longer besides). it is stable which you subject on your puppy. there is not any rationalization why you're able to no longer agonize along with your animals besides with the aid of fact the youngsters. do no longer hear to rather everyone who tells you to agonize approximately your infants and in basic terms the youngsters. those people who inform you which ones are specie-ists. i'm very disenchanted to hearken to that different cats are harmed on Halloween. Throw those human beings interior the slammer and throw away the main. i'm hoping kitty is okay this year.
2016-10-03 06:36:40 · answer #7 · answered by blumenkrantz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
here are a few things to teach your neice 1.always share your halloween candy with others 2.dont eat it all at once 3.brush your teeth afterwards because she could get a cavity with all that sugar in her teeth. and 4. dont steal other peoples candy it isnt right for her to get it all and no one else gets to eat it.
2006-11-04 02:08:31 · answer #8 · answered by mamas_grandmasboy06 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could always sit the sister down with your child and have your sister explain why all the candy is gone. Make sure you are there too so it can't be spun... like thanking the child for sharing all that candy....If that fails, try flogging.
2006-11-04 00:33:01 · answer #9 · answered by miracol@sbcglobal.net 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to give you ten bucks and take your daughter out and replace as much of the candy as possible.
Forget about teaching her a lesson. She's just a dolt!
2006-11-04 00:25:17 · answer #10 · answered by Angela 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋