Affair with an older woman....?

Question

I've made a mistake and gotten myself involved with an older woman. We both have significant others. I screwed up. I don't want it to continue and I've told her as plainly and politely as possible but she keeps calling me and trying to see me. I don't want to just tell her it's over because I think she will go psycho on me so I've been trying to slowly ween her off the sexy goodness. (that was a joke, but I'm totally serious) What should I do???

For the record, I'm going to tell MY significant other about my actions, but I want it to be completly over before I do. It's going to be hard enough for us to work through without some crazy woman causing more problems.

Mikey - I think she would actually go for that....the older woman that is, not my girlfriend.

Answer 1

First of all, you need to hear a "shame on you". With that being said you just need to stop contact completely. If you have to change your phone number and email or find another job, then do it. You can't worry about her getting psycho unless you think she would actually harm or kill you or the girl you cheated on her with. If that is the case, you need to get a restraining order and that may require a confession to the girl you are with but sometimes we have to do what we have to do and deal with the consequences based on the mistakes we have made. You can't just go about this with a safe approach and try to hide it in spite of your own indiscretions. The fact is, and you know this, you have done something wrong and possibly unforgivable but you need to own up to it and learn from it. Many of us, have had the option to have an affair and chose not to but you chose to do it and there is a reason, no matter how minute that reason is. There is something that led you into this decision to have an affair and that needs to be addressed. This is about owning up to the person you are in spite of the mistakes and hopefully you will have the outcome you desire, but if you don't, you will have to accept that it was your decision that led to the outcome. Best of luck and in the future you might consider thinking about the future and not meeting a momentary need.

Answer 2

She has to realize it is over and unfortunately, since you need to keep it secret, you cannot gain support from friends and family to help her understand it is over.

You should consider changing your phone numbers so she doesn't call at home and spill the beans to the wife... or you should just tell your wife so you can have her support to get her to end it.

Maybe you and the wife should get some "holiday" pictures made and that may help her see you two are a couple.... and she is out of the "picture".

Answer 3

have a 3-some

Answer 4

If you think she is going to go psycho, than i think you had better tell your wife now. That women might tell her,
and it would be best if it came from you.

Answer 5

be a man and break it off with her, no need to worry, if she threatens to tell your wife, let her know that you already have. then, DON'T tell your wife, and don't do it again, and go to your grave with the guilt. why should your wife be hurt because you are a cheating lying yellow bellied coward?

Answer 6

1. Run Forrest....run....

2. Seriously, you may have to use tough love and call it quits point blank. If she goes psycho....see step 1.

Answer 7

Fake a std-That will cool things down.

Answer 8

Go Cold Turkey or go on a holiday.

Answer 9

dont answer her calls

Answer 10

simply tell her to leave you alone.