My 2 yr old has began biting and hitting. Time out's aren't working. Any advice on discipline? Plse help!

Question

I have spanked my daughter for this behavior...and that didn't work, the behavior became WORSE. That is WHY I went to time outs...they (at first) were more effective.
Pussy, liberal parent, I'm not...but I am NOT going to beat my child nor am I going to bite her. That is abuse.

Answer 1

My son was a biting child.
What I used was VINEGAR.
We all know how absolutely gross vinegar is, and that it is also completely harmless.
When the girl bites, use a Q-tip and swab her tongue with vinegar. I promise you that it only takes ONCE for the child to realize that it is NOT desireable. And you tell her if she bites, she gets vinegar. It is the best deterrent ever, because they REMEMBER and know how gross it is. Carry some in your purse in a small vile, so that when you are away from home, and she tries to bite, the punishment is consistent, and she knows it.
Good luck.

Answer 2

I have a two year old doing the same thing (and I think I'll try the vinegar approach when things get really bad, that was a great idea!). I use time outs also, and it stops the behavior for the time being, but not permanently. But what I have come to notice is that he never bites or hits anyone except in our immediate family, when we are at home and he is frustrated with something (and no, no one in our family bites or hits, so it's not because of an example he sees). What I've realized is that he's usually frustrated with either me or my husband, and can't adequately tell us his frustrations because of his limited verbal skills. Plus, he's a boy, and naturally due to gender has a tendency of needing to express himself physically. When he hits or bites, it's not an immediate reaction, like a reflex...he will actually actively search things out to hit or bite and won't stop until he is disciplined (he's come to expect time out and even tell me that's where he needs to go if I am slow to respond). So I've discovered that channeling his frustrations onto something more appropriate than mommy (a stuffed animal, for example) has helped tremendously. Have you ever been so frustrated that you've just put a pillow over your mouth and screamed into it? It's healthy to get it out, but he needs to learn appropriate methods for doing so. So my son has a bunny that he can hit and bite all he wants, and if I see him start to come at me, I quickly get the bunny and let him have at it. Then I explain to him that it hurts mommy, but it's okay to do to the bunny. Once the language barrier is no longer an issue, I believe the biting and hiting urges will go away. But if he does it to me, it'll be time out (and the vinegar now too!) until he learns to stop. Be persistent, I know it's frustrating!

Answer 3

When giving him a time out explain to him why he is on a time out. Make sure you keep him there on the time out. You need to be consistent. If he is kicking and biting when he is playing with someone and it's because he can't have a toy then by all means take away the toy and remove him from the situation. Then explain to him and ask him why you had to give him a time out. Then once you have talked with him make sure he stays on the chair or whatever until the amount of time is up. If you put him in his room, make sure it has no toys for him to play with in it, or the time out won't work. It takes some time, but patient is key also. Don't give up. Something will work.

Answer 4

For biting--I sprayed listerine in my son's mouth--the yellow, medinciny tasting listerine. I only had to do it twice. He never bit again.

For hiting--Say something like, "You must need mommy's hands to help your hands be good." Put both of his hands in between your two hands. Then turn your face away from him. That's the part that really gets them. They are immobilized, AND they can't get your attention. After a minute or so, release him and turn your face back. If he does it again, repeat. Don't lose your temper, and don't argue with him. Even at 2, he knows you don't approve of this behavior. Big explanations aren't needed or helpful. Constricting his movement like this and denying him any attention (even the attention of a lecture) is pretty frustrating for him; and that frustration makes a great deterrant.

For my kid on these particular problems, these tips worked a lot better than spanking or timeouts.

Answer 5

Well ill just tell you something. You can put a child in time out, take aways their toys, no TV...etc, but it just wont work.

I dont know how you spank your child, but i tell you that if you do one good hard time, he they wont to it again. I know, i have raised my nephew and i dont think they come any meaner (lol)

No matter what anyone thinks, spanking a child is NOT abuse. I was advised by a social worker (when his mom died) to punsih him with the same thing he is doing. Im not saying hit your child, but when it bites you...bite back (not hard of course)...and they will stop! Its not abuse...its discipline...okay?


good luck...

Answer 6

dont yell at them, thats the last thing you want to do..oh and hitting of course because they might end up saying something like i don't like you mommy, which i would imagine would beak your heart, the best thing to do is tell them to stop( calmly and kindly) if they keep doing it ignore it act as if it has no importance to you, but if it hurt raise your voice a little bit making him sure that your tone isn't to loud or mean , and on the 3rd try find an area in the house where he can sit alone without breaking anything or making a mess and say you just...me now you have to sit in here and when i come back you have to say your sorry. and close it so he can't get out. keep going back until he says sorry then set him free. this is a sort of discipline that will help , but you can't feel sorry for hitting them or whatever you have to stay firm and thats how you 2 both learn and when he acts better you can give him/get him something special that he might like. ( does he/or she talk??)

Answer 7

Apparently try to get to him before he bites or hits and make the bites into kisses (therfore praise him and make a fuss) and turn the hits into strokes (actually take hold of his hand and make him stroke you.) Sounds a bit soppy but positive praise for positive action is much better than a reaction for bad behaviour.
If all else fails, I used to bite when I was tiny and my mum made me eat a spoon of mustard, making it v clear why I was doing that, and I never bit again. I bit because I loved them soooo much that I just had to bite! Good luck!

Answer 8

I don't care what Dr. Phill or any other PhD out there says.

SPANK your children!

It is perfectly normal and natural. If your child bites you, bite it back. Obviously not really hard, but enough to pinch the skin. When the child burst in tears. Explain to it that it hurts you as well when they bite. Experience is the best teacher.

Answer 9

This shouldn't be looked at just as discipline. Perhaps your child has some pent-up anger?

What you need to do is have a child her age pinch her as hard as they can (but rememeber, he/she is a two year old, so that won't be hard). When your child gets annoyed, tell her she just experienced your point of view.

Be firm. Yell if you must, and do NOT falter because of tears.

Answer 10

For biting, I'd make him taste soap...they'll stop real fast... for hitting, I'd take away their favorite thing for the night. Let him cry...it's just one night. In the morning, when he wants his thing, ask him if he got it taken away for hitting...he should say yes, or nod his head. Ask him if he's understands that you'll take it again if he hits. He should nod yes.. Then ask him if he's going to hit again...hopefully it's no,...if he says yes, just say " well, you need to try,..but everyone gets a second chance....and if you do it again I will take it away again." This way he learns consequence of actions that aren't acceptable. Keep the time-outs in the pic. as well, and make him apologize to who he hit.