On Xmas day 2004, my sister and I had a heated argument. Her husband got involved and words were exchanged. My BIL told me that my life was virtually hopeless. I made the statement that my father's death at an early age had caused me to suffer from depression and then said, "At least you still have your father".
In Aug 2005 his father died suddenly and he did not want me to know. My sister gave my mother clear instructions that her husband did not want me to know about his father's death. My mother was very puzzled and my sister said it was because of the comment I had made - that at least he still had a father.
I did not know his father nor did I have any association with him. He died of heart complications. To this day, he still does not know that I know. He told my sister it would mean the end of their marriage if I knew. He has convinced my sister that I am responsible for his father's death and he dosn't want me to know.
It is all so upsetting - we havn't spoke in 2 yrs
2006-11-03 17:00:02 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Health Professionals are the ones to ask. Counseling is what needs to happen even if it is just one session, whatever works. But, you have to talk about this with health professionals. Please do so.
2006-11-03 17:23:28 · answer #1 · answered by zclifton2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, heart complications come from what we eat, failure to exercise properly, smoking and drinking, worry and birth defects, unless the complications were because of violence . I don't think you were forcing or causing any of these things to happen to his father (assuming you are not guilty of violence). Also, I am sure the doctor involved told him what caused his fathers death. Try this, send a Xmas card to the family but do not put any of their names. Just say something like happy holidays, with love. Don't say anything about health, or life, or wishing the best.Then forget about it and move on with your life. Your sister is a victim of ignorance from her husband and she has to keep peace with him or there will be more problems for her. Just send the card to end the two years of not speaking, on your side. If they will not respond, you have done your best.
2006-11-04 01:33:39 · answer #2 · answered by ageless 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well 4starters why the hell would u b fussing on the most special day of the year and u were out of line talking about his father u need to apologize and no matter what u said u r not responsible for his fathers death it must have been a really heated argument if this has been going on for2yrs
2006-11-04 01:08:03 · answer #3 · answered by sandy k 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would hate to meet up with you on the street if your words kill. I have a similar situation here, but the one's pushing the blame are usually feeling so guilty that they are blaming you do not hastle - one day they may come to terms with it, if not, I think they are just coverin hurtful guilt and feel they won't handle life any other way LOL!!! Just love and forgive them
2006-11-04 01:07:03 · answer #4 · answered by tracey s 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Quit talking to the SOB. He sounds horrible. It isn't your fault. I don't know why he's being such a complete and total asshole to you. Depression is a serious issue. You did not kill his father, and he's a jerk to say so for a comment made almost a year earlier. He just has it out for you. Stay away from him, you're better than that.
2006-11-04 01:03:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
don't sweat it.the guy just needs to grow up.
2006-11-04 01:11:17 · answer #6 · answered by jgmafb 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋