What do I say when my friends make fun of my older boyfriend?

Question

Before I even say anything, I just need to say that if I hear one more person use the words "pedophile" or "child molestor" I'm going to scream. So if you're going to be a jerk and not give me real advice then don't even bother. I'm not in the mood.

When I was 16 I met a 23 year old guy, introduced to me by my aunt. He was cool so we started hanging out and became good friends. It's two years later, and we're finally dating (I'm 18 he's 25)

Nobody knows that we're 7 years apart and this is the greatest relationship I've ever been in because it started as a close friendship. But my other "friends" are constantly teasing and making comments about him.

I'm at the end of my rope. What do I do? What can I say to them? Dumping him is not an option. He's incredible and I'm holding on to him for as long as the relationship works out. Please help.

Thank you guys for giving me mature answers. And you're right. What kind of friends do I have?! They should be excited for me. For those two years, they knew how much I liked him. And now that I've got him, they can't be supportive.

I think I need new friends.

Answer 1

honey, dont even worry about them if they cant support you on e this then tell them they arent real friends to you if they are they will stand behind u take it from someone who knows dont let other people ruin ur life im with a guy im not sure i really love b/c my parents forced me to leave a great great guy good luck and i say hold on to him sounds good

Answer 2

Don't say anything. Just smile in a way that looks like you're thinking they can make fun all they want because you know something they don't . . . and the joke's on them. When they ask what you're smiling about, raise your eyebrows a touch, avert your eyes while keeping the smirk, and then - with it still in place - very obviously change the subject by asking something else without answering. You'l look unaffected and like you have a secret about him so good that a) nothing *they* can say could begin to compete with whatever it is you know that they *don't* and b) it's sooo good (and so JUST between you and him) . . . that not only is there no chance you'd tell them, but there's *SO* no chance, that you're not even going to *say* there's no chance!
No matter what they say or ask, don't loose your mild amusement (at their expense!) and don't ever give them a direct answer - even about WHY you won't answer -- just keep changing the subject, smiling tongue in cheek, and asking them totally new, unrelated questions. Make your questions more ridiculous, the longer it goes on. Just make sure you keep a sidewys smile and a twinkle in your eye. By the end of it, you'll be the one having the fun and laughing for real. And the best part is, try it once and I guarantee you, nothing they say about him will ever bother you again. But chances are, they won't, anyway, because once you have, there's just nothing in it for them anymore. Try it. You'll see, I guarantee it.

Answer 3

Smile as though you have a secret that no one else knows...and tell your friends that you are not letting go of the best thing that has ever happened to you. Tell them that no matter what they say, this is the best relationship you've ever had. If you are always positive about your relationship with your man, they will begin to see that you are truly happy... and your TRUE friends will be happy for you. And those that are not your true friends are merely jealous because you've managed to do what so many people can't do... find a good man!!!! Keep him. Seven years will seem so insignificant the longer you are together!!! Congratulations honey!!

Answer 4

Age is nothing but a number. As long as you didn't do anything with him when you were underage, you won't hear the word pedophile from me. I would tell your friends that your both of consenting age now, and if the age difference doesn't bother the two of you, why should it bother them? The only thing that makes sense is that they're jealous that you found love at such a young age and your love continues to grow.

In short, don't defend your love, just enjoy it.

Answer 5

Breaking up with him would definitly not be an option because he isn't the one starting the problem, it's you're friends. Maybe they're just jealous? It's not like he's a child molester because when you two first started hanging out you were 16, and 16 is the legal age of consent.
Tell your friends it bothers you, and to stop. If they keep saying things to bother you, then they're not real friends. And if you lose them who cares you have your boyfriend :)

Answer 6

I think you know what to do, you just don't want to do it. the problem is your friends, you have a good thing and you know it.
Love like that does not come around offen, maybe never. If your friend are just playfully jesting, i wound do the same. I suspect it is not. What ever the reason for vogar taunting does not matter. They are not your friend if they dispize your happyness. Find new friend, let go of the past and make a future with "father time"
((jesting)) with him, don't waist time, you don't get it back. sharing your life is what makes life worth living

Answer 7

I am not going to criticize. I am married, and my husband is 5-6 years older than me. And I was 13 when I met him. We were just friends until I turned 18. Anyway, there's nothing wrong with what's going on, as long as you were over age when you started dating. Anyway, that being said, if he is incredible, and you are happy, your friends, if true friends, should be happy for you. They should accept him because he treats you well, you are happy, and they are happy for you. As much as I hate to say it, maybe you should re-evaluate your friendships. Tell them how you feel, and see if they accept him. If not, find new friends that want you to be happy. Hope this helped. God bless!!

Answer 8

I'm 24 & my last bf was 42 so I don't judge. Here is my take, some people are way to immature to know how to handle this situation. They don't understand. What has to happen is you either have to tell your friends that it hurts you so they will stop, or just learn to live with their ignorance. If you tell them & they don't stop, they aren't very respectful & you should find some friends who do respect you. I don't think that this age gap is a big deal AT ALL. I wish you all the best.

Answer 9

well, it seems to me that you really like this guy. and sometimes, your friends may not know whats best for you. if they cant support you in the decision youve made with you life, then you really need to talk to them. granted losing friendship is worse than losing a guy, so you really need to just talk to your friends. they probably dont even know that its bothering you that they do this. you sound just like the kind of person i am. you make the slightest indacations to show some connection to anything thats bothering you, but no one else seems to see them right? tell them whats up. maybe things will get better :)

Answer 10

It sounds such as you choose some new pals. perhaps THEY arnt popular. they're installation habit policies for you. you're able to do something you prefer to do. waiting for the spectacular guy to return alongside is a greater physically powerful thought than finding a boyfriend because of the fact your persons say you need to.

Answer 11

You can't let what people say bother you. There's always going to be someone who has a problem with your relationship. The man I've got a thing for is 17 years older than me, but our families are okay with it. You've got to just ignore them and make your own decisions. Good luck.