I know he still loves me, how can I make him come back to me?

Question

My boyfriend broke up with me, and he told me that he still loves me. I still love him very very much, and he loves me. I don't see why we just can't be together. He said that there were things that he needed to do for himself, and that with our relationship, there was something missing (his partial loss of interest, which in the past had been renewed with some time apart), and that if that ever seemed to change then we can think about getting back together.

This is all very new, and I am having a very hard time especially since he had both planned on being together, getting married, and having a family.

Why isn't love enough?

I need to do something to prove to him that we belong together...

Any advise I could get would be greatly appreciated.

I know that he still cares because he keeps talking to me.

I don't know if it is because he misses me and needs to see me anyway, or he just cares enough to want to make sure I am alright....

I really should have mentioned that we pratically were acting like we were married. We slept together everynight, and spent every moment together. Anything that he needed, I made sure he got it.

It was probably much too much, way to fast, but it was what we both wanted.

Can we recover?

Answer 1

I think he just wouldn't feel right and he isn't completely sure of...both of you... because obviously it didn't work out the first time.My advice is give him some more time.Make him believe,and I mean really believe,you guys can work out!I would feel bad if you guys didn't get back together because you didn't prove to him anything.

Answer 2

What l don't understand is if he loves you why doesn't he want to be with you ? l always thought that true love is unconditional. He seems to have put a lot of conditions on your relationship. Also where does he get off telling you that if the way he feels about you changes you two can get back together. Personally if l was you l would tell him to get a real life and grow up. I don't feel you need to prove anything to him, after all he is the one with the problem.I am sorry for sounding so harsh but you seem like a good person and l think you deserve more than he is willing to give. If l was you l would not even consider marrying someone that is so self centered as he sounds.Just think better to find out about his insecurities now before you got married otherwise what could life have been like if you had 2 or 3 children to him and then he decided he wanted out, even though you say you love him, trust me you can do better for yourself with someone who knows what they want and will treat you with the love and respect you deserve. Get over him, l don't feel he is worthy of your love. Best wishes with whatever you decide to do.

Answer 3

I am sure you are so much better than your question indicates. You need to find your pride in yourself! You cannot prove to someone that you belong together. If he wants time, the best thing you can do is act like you are absolutely fine with that, and you should be. Do you really, I mean really want to be with someone that "needs space"??? Let me tell you, he needs space for a reason. What do you think that reason is??? Don't waste your beautiful life over loving someone that doesn't love you back. Trust me, if he really, really loved you, he wouldn't need time and/or space. Plans change in life. Better now, than if you had actually gotten married and had children, then he needed space. Trust me, better now.... Cheer up and live your life and don't get stuck in the rut of thinking "I can't live without him"... It hurts, but in the long run, you will look back and think "what was I thinking?" Don't BEG! You be in charge... If he comes back (after realizing you are in charge), tell him "I'll think about it", and make him sweat. The best thing you can do is not contact him at all, and if you happen to see him, make sure you look like you are doing just fine without him!

Answer 4

Some people say things just because they want to keep you happy. He may tell you that he loves you, but that isn't necessarily true. Sometimes people do stupid things. It sounds like he may be testing the waters and seeing if there is anything better out there. My Ex just decide to do the same thing after 7 years and yes she told me she loved. He may have found someone else already, but wants to keep you as a back up. Try to move on. There is more than one person out there for you.

Answer 5

You can't do anything to make him come back. If he want's you as much as you think he does, he'll come back on his own. Focus on something else till then
Love is enough...but are you sure that's what you have/had? Relationships always have highs and lows...Both have to be committed to make it through both good times and bad.
Don't plan so far ahead also; not many guys are really interested in that (though some, like myself are).

Answer 6

Love is not enough... Love without respect is... pointless... and dangerous.

And it doesn't appear that you respect him.

would you really want to be in a relationship where your partner was with you because you MADE him be with you?

You can't "make" him do anything, you simply don't have that power.

I think the reason he broke up with you is pretty obvious in the way you asked your question. I think you have some things that you need to work on.

Answer 7

I am going through the same thing right now with my (ex)girlfriend. It is really hard. I love her, and I know that she loves me, but (with the encouragement of my parents) I can feel that it isn't right. I am trying to move on, but it is hard. We still see each other, but it is not the same. I can tell it will be truly over soon. I know you are feeling the same way. I know that in time I will meet someone else, and so will you. Good luck.

Answer 8

OK,
Here's a story that might help. I asked my Friend (female) why do men cheat on their women a good women. She responded with "Most me like a hoe in the bedroom and a wife in public." It made since to me, maybe you could try an spice up your sex life, find out that special something that he likes or a fantasy that doesn't make you feel uncomfortable. And give it a try.

Answer 9

if it's space he wants, then give him some space.... and then proceed. think about it. appreciate his honesty now. isn't it better that he is honest with you now instead of later down the road being unfaithful to you or something because of what he feels is lacking or something that could have been fixed or maybe (hate to say it) he isn't the one for you. how do you know that maybe there is someone way better than him that might come along? take your time when deciding to marry.

Answer 10

sometimes plans don't always work out. I used to think I was in love with this guy and I was going to marry him but after we broke up and I annoyed him for awhile, he hated me then I stopped loving him. We went back out but it didn't feel the same. Sometimes its just better to be apart and see what you're left with if you go back out.