i am a nursing assistant so should i be expected to take care?

Question

of my mother-in-law because i work also and she says isn't this what you do. i feel if noone is able to sit at home and give her care she should go to a facility am i wrong. it's like i feel guilty because am a nursing assistant. this woman has bipolar disorder should i be expected to know everything to do and am i a failure if i don't

Answer 1

The fact that no other (immediate) family members have stepped up to take care of her does not mean that you should do it. Discuss this with your husband and let him know how you feel about it.

As a student, you are still learning and probably expect to take a full-time job when you graduate. How will you work outside the home if you are taking care of your mother-in-law? Would your husband's family be willing to pay you for your time caring for their relative?

There are other things to take into consideration, but like I mentioned above, you need to discuss this with your husband and DON'T let anybody make you feel guilty for making yourself the most important priority right now.

Answer 2

There is no reason why you should know everything about bipolar disorder. It is not your responsibility to care for this woman 24/7. Out of respect and love for your husband, you probably spend some time caring for her, but if she needs constant care and the other siblings are not willing to help out then she should go to a facility. When she asks "Isn't this what you do?" just say no, its not. Try not to let her put so much pressure on you.

Answer 3

I'm an accountant, and I won't do my family and friends taxes without some compensation.
My friend is a mechanic, and the last thing he wants to do after working 10 hours is go fix a relatives car. He'll work outside of work for cash only.
How many hours per day does anyone in your family expect you to work?
Now, if you husband works 8 hours a day of hard labor, and then has to come home and put in another 4-6 hours on home projects, the expectation is probably the same for you.
The problem is that for anyone to be able to bare the burden you're faced with, it must be done out of pure love to last the duration.
Otherwise, once someone is off the clock, the only work they should be expected to do is pay the bills.

Answer 4

Don't do anything that you feel uncomfortable doing. Don't let your husband or relatives make you feel responsible for the care of your mother in law. Now if you truely love her and care about her and want to help go for it. But if you are working and feeling exhausted when you get home and maybe have children to look after, taking care of her too would be too much overload for you.

Answer 5

You should not be required to be her private duty nurse unless your are being compensated for it in some way. If she is living independantly she may only need to be monitored by her doctor(s) to make sure she is taking her meds. What does your husband say? Does he have other siblings who can pitch in if she needs more care?

I used to work as a nursing assistant and we didn't get much training in working with mental health patients.

Answer 6

This is a very good blog, a beginner’s guide to abnormal psychology.
Short, clear and simple; and you can even post your question and contact the author regarding particular subject you are interested in

http://sensitive-psychoworld.blogspot.com/