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She has gone beyond tantrums and is in a rage if she doesn't get her way or has to do something she doesn't want to. We are at our wits end as it's been going on for 6 mo now and ignoring her isn't working. Actually she gets louder and the neighbors have gotten us thrown out of our apartment because of the disturbance. We are trying to fix the problem before we get thrown out of anywhere else.

2006-11-03 06:42:25 · 10 answers · asked by mchllfeliciano 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting Toddler & Preschooler

10 answers

I would suggest a child psychologist if you are having that much trouble. Since she is 3 years old, she is most likely able to convey her feelings.

2006-11-03 06:48:37 · answer #1 · answered by KathyS 7 · 2 0

Well, my daughter is much younger so even though they both have the same problem they have to be handled differently.

I would suggest asking her why she is yelling. Ask her what it is she is trying to say and explain that there is no need to yell. "If you don't want to do something just say so! You don't have to scream." Don't let her know she's going to get out of doing what needs to be done but that yeling is not ok. It goes towards "catching more flies with honey."

We've taught our daughter that she has to use a quiet voice because we can't hear when she yells. So far it's worked! When she starts yelling we just sshhh her and say we can't hear your words when you scream. Don't underestimate her intelligence. Yelling just happens to be a faster way she thinks she can get her point across.

Good luck and know that a majority of kids grow out of that and you can return the favor by teaching their kids how to do it if you really want to. lol Isn't parenting a fun hobby?

2006-11-03 06:55:35 · answer #2 · answered by Annie Hightower 3 · 0 0

wow! Sounds like you need a country place where she can scream her guts out and no one cares...she is starting out early to let her wants known...ouch...My sister is going through this and her girl is five...she has tried alot of tactics...it gets calmed down for a couple days and something will set it off like not having a certain color shirt right before school...she has tried time out and spanking...she even told her that mom and dad were in control so talking does not work (reasoning). If it deals with something you want her to do...take something off of her that she just has to have and when she does the chore give item back...If you have to pick up toys, make a mommy bag and keep them...There are adults who act this way and it is sad because people walk away from them or dislike them.

2006-11-03 06:54:36 · answer #3 · answered by Patches6 5 · 1 0

in all reality, your first instinct - to ignore it - is the best; with any behavior modification the frequency of the inappropriate behavior will increase before it decreases; in other words, she will try harder to get her way before she realizes that it won't work; any time she gets rewarded for acting (even you attention can be a reward) out it will be harder to extinguish the bad behavior; my daughter discovered at 15 months old that she could make herself gag by sticking her fingers down her throat and thereby getting my immediate attention when she didn't get what she wanted; it took some time, but I finally realized that she would not die from doing this and I would walk out when she started this behavior; she eventually stopped at home only to try the same thing at day care; when I told them to ignore her it stopped there also; I know you are frustrated, but you must have the patience and stamina to stop this now before she grows into someone that no one wants to be around; good luck

2006-11-03 06:57:54 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

my 3 and a half yr old daughter is the same way at times.she used to do that all of the time before we started threatening her that we will pop her butt if she doesnt stop screaming.(we only had to spank her 5 or six times until she learnt that we mean it so all we have to do now is to threaten her and she quits and tells us"ill be good i dont want my butt pop")but if you are one of these new age families that doesnt believe in spanking a child,i would do this way instead:(i use this way if she does it in public)tell her if she doesnt quit her screaming she wont be able to go outside and play or get a treat after she eats if she keeps it up.that works too espelly if it happens in public but to me threatening to pop the butt works best....lol.to me the time out thing doesnt work and ESPELLY IGNORING HER doesnt work(trust me we tried that too)and anyone that recomends someone to do that is crazy cause thats giving the kid the say so that"mommy and daddy doesnt care if i do it so im gonna do it")hope that helps hun

2006-11-03 08:52:54 · answer #5 · answered by ShreekyDaStonerLette 420 2 · 0 0

I wasn't a teenage mom and my infants are nonetheless very small. regardless of the shown fact that, I somewhat have alwasy assumed that if one among my boys ( i comprehend its alittle different by using fact I somewhat have boys, yet I even have stepdaughter and can manage the area an identical way) have been given their female buddy pregnant at a youthful age, i might settle for it. I dont somewhat see what the ingredient is in getting mad and screaming approximately it, its achieved. there is not any reason i'm able to be sure to outlaw the boyfreind seeing as he's merely as accountable in all this by using fact the daughter. i might merely g forward and get happy, youre going to have grandchild in spite of everything! i might settle for him into the relatives as long as he respected what which potential. He might must be supportive of my daughter jointly as she have been pregnant and somewhat make an truthful attempt to be a competent father whilst the toddler grew to become into born. He might additionally must be prepared to stand by potential of my daughter and help her finacially. that's what i might assume of my boys have been they in that venture. helping the boyfriend is one way of supportng your daughter. My mothers saying is and consistently has been... if shes(me) happy, then i'm happy. If she will become unhappy with him (my husband or boyfriends on the time) then I grow to be unhappy. Be there on your daughter, by using fact no longer being there mightchronic her away. good success to you!

2016-12-28 11:56:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Sounds like ignoring isn't working. You need to make sure she realizes you are in charge. If my child yells at me, I tell her in a firm voice that I am her mother and she is not to speak to me that way. Then I will either place her in a corner to stand, put her in her room, take away some toys.....whatever punishment works at the time. Once she is calm, we revisit the situation and I make her tell me what she did wrong so she understands.

2006-11-03 06:46:38 · answer #7 · answered by smllover 3 · 1 0

When my daughter does this I send her to her room and shut the door. It took a few times, and every now and then she still does it, but we tell her when she is done yelling she can come out. When she realizes there is no one around to listen, she usually quits. Hope it works for you.

2006-11-03 06:52:08 · answer #8 · answered by purpledragonflyjrh 4 · 1 0

There are tantrums that are considered "normal" and ones that aren't. Normal is stomping, screaming, etc.--the usual fit. Not normal is screaming and throwing a fit so bad that you get kicked out of the apartment building. It's not your fault, but you do need to do something about it before she hurts herself or does something else terrible because of her fits.

Ignoring them works for regular tantrums, but tantrums like these I think it's best you consult her pediatrician and see what he/she recommends.

2006-11-03 06:47:58 · answer #9 · answered by CelebrateMeHome 6 · 0 2

time to smack her bottom and put her in time out. set boundaries and stick to them

2006-11-03 06:55:36 · answer #10 · answered by kleighs mommy 7 · 0 0

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