whenever she is around at our house he treats me badly sometimes yelling at me saying it's me when iv'e done nothing at all. his father passed away years ago and the mother does things for attention . the sons let her stay in her home by herself with piss everywhere until they can get over to clean it. nobody really has time to sit and care for her not even me so why wouldn't they put her somewhere instead of stressing everyone out. i'm tired of being blamed for nothing being the daughter-in-law. he stays mad at me fussing etc am afraid to say what they should do or even tell my husband because i feel he will go off and push me etc because of whatever is going on.how do i find out the real problem is because i know it's not so why would he even say that
2006-11-03 03:37:27 · 12 answers · asked by mmmm n 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Wow. First, you can't be the one to suggest that your mother-in-law be placed in a retirement facility where they could help her. That cannot come out of your mouth. But what you can do is tell your husband that you will not tolerate being treated that way by him. Ask him specifically what it is that he expects you to do. What about the other son's wives? Do they feel the same way? maybe a family meeting is in order? Would it be possible to have someone come in and stay with her to help take care of her?
Good luck.
2006-11-03 03:43:38 · answer #1 · answered by sassybree1979 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow honey...I know what it is like. My step kids Mom has bipolar and she can be nice as pie when she is on her meds. But if she is off of them she is a witch. Her kids are 10 and they go over to see her. She is so jealous of me because I'm raising her babies. Yet there are days when she comes over to our house with everything of the kids and dumps it on our lawn and says she never wants to see them again. She calls my cell phone and leaves the ugliest messages. Yet they love their Mom...because she buys them things every time they go over.
Is there any way you could put her in a home or psych place? She should be able to get SSI so she doesn't have to work any more. That is where my husbands ex went when she had the babies and went out of her mind. They treated her for like a year and then released her. It doesn't sound like she is living in a healthy environment. If she was in a "home" they would make sure that she takes her meds at lest. If she takes her meds she will be a totally different person.
I'm so scared that my step sons have this diorder also. I pray every day. I'll say a prayer for you also...I know what it is like.
May God be with you...good luck!
2006-11-03 13:36:57 · answer #2 · answered by hard rock girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a nurse and I know bipolar disorder very well....
Without medication she is going to continue to go down and act more and more bizarre.....and if she's staying in the home with piss everywhere...cmon this is really way out of control....She needs to be placed in a facility where she can be controlled by the medication she needs as well as well trained staff members.
This will ensure she is getting her meds on time daily...Once the meds get into her system she will more than likely calm down...and the family can then maybe make some decisions about her coming home.....
In the meantime go on-line and look into bipolar disorders and share the information you gather with your husband.....And call your local County Psychiatric Hospital and get some info about admittance for her.......and honey if your husband is pushing you that's a whole other issue you need to deal with.....maybe you should get away and work on you. No one deserves to he hit and pushed around....
Good luck honey
2006-11-03 13:05:41 · answer #3 · answered by girlegyrl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you saying that your husband treats you badly when his mother is around? If that is the case, you may want to think about ending the marriage. You say you are afraid to tell your husband what you think because he may push you? Do you mean physically push you? That is abuse. It sounds like you are in a bad situation. You have 2 choices, stay and deal with it or leave.
2006-11-03 13:40:56 · answer #4 · answered by Gypsy Girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like the issue is more with your husband than it is with your mother-in-law. Is there a reason she doesn't always take the meds? If your husband defends this nonsense to the hilt because "it's his mom", and you're worried about him getting violent with you, you may simply want to ask yourself if this is just a lost cause. Does "drama" seem to erupt out of nowhere a lot?? If so, RUN LIKE HELL! Especially if you've been expressing your feelings and getting nowhere.
2006-11-03 11:45:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is so much going on her that some one has to step in and get some thing going, Tell you husband that you are not going to put up with his bad temper anymore, he and his family need to deal with HIS mother right now, it is not fair to the family nor is it fair to the mother, she needs help , and so do they
2006-11-03 12:24:51 · answer #6 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have lived with my mother who is bi polar for 24 years. i got the short end of that stick and like you got blamed for most things with out any cause. One thing You must learn and so does your husbands family. You are not a dog to be kicked around by your mother in law. She has a disease to which you are not the cure for. Stand up to her. I learned after almost 20 years of living with my mother that she will either not treat me like that or not see me. Your husband will either respect what you have to say or not. lets hope he does. i know its about his mom. so be gentle. be positive. don't say anything when you are angry. something else i have learned dealing with this disease. just be prepared to have your husband not to be happy to hear what you have to say. so just be calm and point things out to him as they come up around his mother and be patient.
2006-11-03 13:02:08 · answer #7 · answered by meg10_82 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your husband tell him you feel and if things don't change get the heck out you shouldnt be put thru that choose a better life for yourself
2006-11-03 11:49:12 · answer #8 · answered by FLOWER 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a very good blog, a beginner’s guide to abnormal psychology.
Short, clear and simple; and you can even post your question and contact the author regarding particular subject you are interested in
http://sensitive-psychoworld.blogspot.com/
2006-11-06 12:51:26 · answer #9 · answered by LIz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell your in laws to kiss your azz it is not your job to care for a wacko mother in law they need to get some one in there and pay them to do this job and by the way he would not be pushing you around if you stood your ground
2006-11-03 12:10:10 · answer #10 · answered by just_me_1955 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋