I have a fiancee who suffers from schizoaffective disorder,but I never saw his disease as a problem.His "bad moments" were never related to me and were never that bad-he's no different then any other person in their cranky days, only difference is that he has to take a medication for it.I'm doing everything to be by his side and understand him as much as I can and I enjoy it!We share love that i never though i could have with anyone.We are soulmates!He is always there for me and together we try to appriciate the little things in life-what makes us so happy.
I'm curious to know if there are other men/women who's partner is suffering some illness (mental of physical-and which?) and do they find it as a problem?Do their friends mind?I don't mind not even a bit, infact i have never been happier in my whole life. My friends and family see that, but I guess many people amaze by our or my couridge to have a relationship.Part of love is accapting good and bad sides that we all have!Isn't it?
2006-11-03 02:14:18 · 7 answers · asked by lina_girl06 3 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Thank YOU lakshmi s, for your words!!! For now I must say that he is doing very well, he found a medication that fits him after a long stuggle! His side effects are not big and not affecting his life too much, but his not a person who complains - for that and many other things I consider him a hero!He won his depression couple of years ago, and is battling social anxiety-which is so much better now! All I have to say to people like him is never to give up! You only have this illnes (it could happen to anybody) but you are NOT the illness itself!
2006-11-03 02:36:41 · update #1
Dear sarge927, my fiancee also had problems with past relationship and his illness. Mostly, he never said anything as he though he will scare off the girl, but also coz he really tried not to get too serious with them and "expoused". I was the one who stayed and in the beginning (as from a start we felt something amazing between us) found out about his condition. I remeber he was so afraid of what I will do or say, he sent me an email (as he found it easier to write it) and NEVER minded or never looked him other way after knowing the truth. In fact I think that our love got even deeper, more then i would say "normal" couples feel. He is my life! And i already promise I will do everything to help him and understand him at anytime. He already does that for me!
2006-11-03 02:46:55 · update #2
My wife suffers from myotonic muscular dystrophy. She's almost fully functional but she can't jump, she has problems going up and down stairs, she has trouble grasping and pulling on certain car doors, she has irritable bowel syndrome because of the MMD, she falls every time she loses her balance, and of course she's "weaker" than women her age who aren't afflicted with this disease. It's possible that she may be wheelchair-bound someday (she was the last time we went to Disney World on vacation -- she can't walk very far without getting tired either)
Is it a problem? Nope. I have to help her with certain things and she has to be careful not to lose her balance, but that doesn't change the way I feel about her. When we first met she told me she had MMD, thinking I might get scared off right away, but my reply was "You'll have to do better than that -- my first wife was completely healthy and was killed in a car accident, so I don't make decisions on what might happen because we have no guarantees in life anyway." She was FLOORED. Every other boyfriend she ever had either had reservations about her MMD or flat out told her they couldn't handle it. What wimps!
Our friends and family don't have a problem with it, and I find that most people are very understanding when it comes to her condition. I imagine it may be different for you because your fiancee has a mental affliction, but it doesn't change who he is or the fact that you love him, right? If other people can't understand that or can't deal with it, that's their problem.
2006-11-03 02:27:07 · answer #1 · answered by sarge927 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have episodic depression and my baby's father has major depression. His depression is only shown to me, the rest of the world he hides it very well. I am the "demon" and the "cause" when he wants the world to know how he feels. Yet I am the one who helps him when he's down. I keep his depression and what happens inside to myself. Mainly to protect our daughter. It has been an issue since we got together 8 years ago. Now that we are have a 2 1/2 year old daughter I couldn't withstand his depression and mine together or mixed together. When his is triggered mine is triggered. This causes a whirlwind of emotions that I just don't want my daughter to grow up seeing on a day to day basis. I've lived it all my life with my mom who also has major depression. I know the effects it can bear on a child. I have to see her father every day of course but the depression "conflict" isn't sparked as it used to be. I feel this is a wise decision for my daughter, my sanity, and his when he realizes why I've left. He doesn't now, I'm here for him to help him understand but I'm still the wrong doer in his eyes. Don't get me wrong, there were far more other reasons why we seperated. If it was depression that kept us apart we wouldn't have been together for 8years to prove it. :D
2006-11-03 03:52:33 · answer #2 · answered by Her Mama 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husband has schizophrenia and I suffer from major depression with dissociative disorder. I have never found my husbands illness to be a problem.I got educated on the illness to understand it more for his sake.When you truly love someone for who they are then no matter what the problem you can handle it and see them through it. Our friends don't mind most of them are very understanding and his family is supportive as well
2006-11-03 02:38:19 · answer #3 · answered by nana_viki 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes my ex has schisaphrinia sorry about the spelling anyway he started doing drugs and he wouldn't take his med to help control himself he became abusive because of his disability but one thing i can say is we did have 2 beautiful children together and its been 4 years since being together and he is getting worse because of the drugs.Honestly you r in a wonderful relationship and all is well it doesn't affect you or anyone else then that is great.I hope it stays that way as long as you and himr happy and u love and respect each other then that is all that matters.
2006-11-03 02:29:28 · answer #4 · answered by too4barbie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you assert she refuses to get help, yet will she circulate to the medical expert with you? certainly w/ her background she realizes there is not any shame in getting help for a psychological problem? possibly you should show on your medical expert what is going on and pretend it is an appt . for your self and you like/ want her to circulate with you. it incredibly is a protracted shot yet possibly it would artwork. additionally, have you ever checked, meaning researched. what meds, if any, she is on? some drugs could have an quite undesirable reaction or interplay w/ others and reason very almost a chemical psychosis. I took ONE Cymbalta pill as quickly as for some minor melancholy and went right into a 2 week rigidity attack the place i assumed my loved husband replaced into attempting to kill me, etc. it incredibly is a joke now in spite of the indisputable fact that it replaced into frightening as hell then. A neurologist shown it incredibly is uncommon yet that it happens to 3 people w/ SSNRI drugs. My mom replaced into additionally placed on multiple meds for melancholy and rigidity that had her questioning extraordinary issues. additionally a type of clogged arteries could reason a type of dementia. some dementia can be extremely almost anger pushed and violent. It has some thing to do with loss of oxygen being carried to the concepts. returned, perhaps the two one in each and every of you should in basic terms decide for ordinary physicals mutually and you should furnish the medical expert a clue of what is going on previously. I choose i must be of extra help. you rather could desire to love her yet each and every from time to time we ought to love ourselves first. If she would have the ability to no longer settle for that, you and the babies might ought to circulate on. i'm no longer prepared on ultimatums yet thus i think of you are able to ought to assert- seem, I care approximately you yet i'm able to't stay this way- you are able to desire to get help or i'm able to't stay. you apart from could do no longer say how previous the babies are. I actually do no longer agree w/ utilising the babies yet possibly thus, she is rational adequate to nicely known that till she gets a sparkling bill of psychological well being she could lose the babies?
2016-10-21 04:57:41 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i should congratulate u for ever thing u are giving hope and life to a person who is sick.do't think about others But be prepared to some side effect he gets due the medicines. do what u r mind says GOD helps u and GOD BLESS U
2006-11-03 02:22:42 · answer #6 · answered by red rose 5 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i am physicaly disabled my husband is my carer i have a rare genetic desease besides arthurithus all through my body also got heart desease which is under control through diet also have asthma now i am having problems with left arm being numb and the doctor seems to think i have a trapped nerve in my neck we all get our off days though i would be really k******** with out him he does everything for me not many men like him
2006-11-03 02:29:04 · answer #7 · answered by patricia b 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋